Lolz nicked off teh interweb

[ChrisJ]

See, anyone who's ever spent any time in cheap Asian hotels - or backpacker hostels anywhere - is laughing at how precisely that inverts the actual situation.

[San Bernardhinault]

I think anyone whose ever been anywhere knows how this inverts the actual situation.

[Discordant Resonance]

https://twitter.com/Historiographos/status/1729493204666577359

[Discordant Resonance]

https://twitter.com/BelTel/status/1729588673715274073

[Patrick Thistle]

Nice trophy, mate. What did you win that for? Oh no...

[Hot Pepsi]

[San Bernardhinault]

Funny that neither Leonardo di Caprio nor Woody Allen appear to have said it.

[Discordant Resonance]

https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1731243128860950770

[Gangster Octopus]

I'm also obsessed about the failure of the Northern Line extension to Bushey, but I've managed to hide it from my wife...

[Patrick Thistle]

[Amor de Cosmos]

An email chain giggle. It's a bit long but worth the effort:

"The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid-term,:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, so then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not acceptingThe following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid-term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well : Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, so then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.' THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+. (Well deserved)

[Patrick Thistle]

[Patrick Thistle]

[ChrisJ]

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Umm... chemistry undergraduates needed the terms 'endothermic' and 'exothermic' explaining?

This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, so then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

Also, doesn't it give three possibilities, the third of which is that Hell is expanding at precisely the rate required to maintain constant pressure and temperature?

Also, how do we know "Teresa" really did sleep with him/her?

#actuallyautistic

[Plodder]

Frankly I have my doubts as to whether there even is a Teresa.

[Amor de Cosmos]

Frankly I have my doubts as to whether there even is a Teresa.

I had the same feeling. Sounds like rather desperate wishful thinking to me.

[Balderdasha]

Also, doesn't it give three possibilities, the third of which is that Hell is expanding at precisely the rate required to maintain constant pressure and temperature?

I had the exact same thought.

[Nocturnal Submission]

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/he...ic-exothermic/

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

Thanks NS! So, in short, the Teresa aspect of the story is a modern addition to a venerable original anecdote, and the implausible use, for thermodynamics students’ benefit, of those definitions is just an amendment designed to make the joke comprehensible to a non-scientific readership.

[ChrisJ]

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/he...ic-exothermic/

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0315733/ [smiley thing]

[Nocturnal Submission]

Thanks NS! So, in short, the Teresa aspect of the story is a modern addition to a venerable original anecdote, and the implausible use, for thermodynamics students’ benefit, of those definitions is just an amendment designed to make the joke comprehensible to a non-scientific readership.

Yeah, pretty much I reckon.

Whenever I hear of a brilliantly unorthodox answer to an examination question, my bullshitometer begins to clang.

[Nocturnal Submission]

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0315733/ [smiley thing]

Haha!

[Patrick Thistle]

[Sean of the Shed]

[Nocturnal Submission]