Rubbish nicknames

[WOM]

Guess what Harmonica Shah and Johnny Drummer do.

[Stumpy Pepys]

Synthesizer Patel was a good one though.

[3 Colours Red]

Series one of Look Around You was better though.

Billy Joel. A man that plays the piano. You can guess the rest.

[elguapo4]

"Slowhand "

[Sits]

"Miami" Steve van Zandt AKA Little Stephen.

[Snake Plissken]

Which John Mellencamp himself opposed and subsequently disavowed.

One of the best gags in the criminally under-watched comedy-western series "The Adventures of Brisco County Jr" is

Hired Gun: And who's he?
Montana's Assistant: This here's Utah Johnny Montana.
Mack Brackman: That's some name.
Montana's Assistant: It used to be Utah John Cougar Montana, but he dropped the 'Cougar' because he thought it was pretentious.

[Stumpy Pepys]

Gary US Bonds

[Jah Womble]

There's a blues musician and his way-cool stage name is Johnny 'Guitar' Johnson or something. That's not it, but the 'Guitar' is the middle bit...you know...cuz he plays guitar. It doesn't get much worse than that. I guess you could paint Saxa with the same brush, but I won't...out of respect.

Are you perchance referring to Johnny 'Guitar' Watson - one of the finest blues/R&B musicians of his generation?

Shocked and saddened, sir. Shocked and saddened.

(I'll concede that it wasn't the most imaginative nickname, however.)

Another: Oran 'Juice' Jones. Rubbish nickname.

[Eggchaser]

Whenever I hear "The Edge" I always get a moment where I think of the WWE wrestler, Edge, before remembering it's the guitarist.

Which is a shame, as I am sure many of us would pay good money to see the man also known as Adam Copeland reunite with his tag team partner Christian to deliver a Con-Chair-To (simultaneous chair shots to the head) to Bono.

[Stobart]

The Big O.

[duncanmckenziedoughnuts]

"Slowhand "

To be fair, as it is an adolescent nickname based on his real name being 'Clapp', I think it is a good one.

[Stobart]

Anyone named Clapp at my school would have been given a nickname which has nothing to do with hands ........

[3 Colours Red]

Anyone named Clapp at my school would have been given a nickname which has nothing to do with hands ........

What kind of nickname is "The"?

[G-Man]

This isn't really a thread of rubbish nicknames but of "any musicians with nicknames, some of which are rubbish". For example, in how is the nickname "Satchmo" in any way rubbish? It becomes rubbish, of course, when it is being used pretentiously as faux intimacy. An example is Robin Williams announcing that "What A Wonderful World" -- the least representative Armstrong song in his canon -- was sung by "Satchmo".

Likewise, references to Bruce Springsteen as "The Boss" are rubbish, whereas the nickname itself is pretty accurate. He's nothing if not the boss of his musical ensemble. But that's the thing with nicknames like that: using them implies a certain intimacy, which in relation to remote stars is a pretension on behalf of the user.

From that I'd exclude stage names though. If we are going to slam The Edge, then we should also go after Bob "Dylan" or "Billie" "Holiday" or "Lady Gaga" or "Elton" "John". (Though we could ask John Legend what the hell he was thinking).

[G-Man]

Frank Sinatra, who apparently despised the "Chairman of the Board" appellation, and would probably include it in this thread himself.

I don't know where he stood on "Ole Blue Eyes", but I bet he felt like putting a bullet through Bono's brain when that idiot in their "duet" of "I've Got You Under My Skin" witlessly whimpered the lyrics-corrupting line, "Don't you know, Blue Eyes, you never can win".

[Jah Womble]

This isn't really a thread of rubbish nicknames but of "any musicians with nicknames, some of which are rubbish". For example, in how is the nickname "Satchmo" in any way rubbish? It becomes rubbish, of course, when it is being used pretentiously as faux intimacy. An example is Robin Williams announcing that "What A Wonderful World" -- the least representative Armstrong song in his canon -- was sung by "Satchmo".

Likewise, references to Bruce Springsteen as "The Boss" are rubbish, whereas the nickname itself is pretty accurate. He's nothing if not the boss of his musical ensemble. But that's the thing with nicknames like that: using them implies a certain intimacy, which in relation to remote stars is a pretension on behalf of the user.

From that I'd exclude stage names though. If we are going to slam The Edge, then we should also go after Bob "Dylan" or "Billie" "Holiday" or "Lady Gaga" or "Elton" "John". (Though we could ask John Legend what the hell he was thinking).

Perhaps had you read my post a little more carefully you'll have noted that I clearly described 'Satchmo' as a good (or 'good-ish') nickname? But let's not hope for too much.

And while I accept the suggestion that some of these are alter-egos/stage-names rather than nicknames, if people think those that 'are' to be 'rubbish' then they're at liberty to say so here, I'd've thought.

Yours,

Jah 'The Deckchair' Womble

(Smiley thing.)

[WOM]

When my daughter was maybe 5 or 6, her class did a lesson on nicknames. Not long after, at dinner, I mentioned something or other about Frank Sinatra and she really casually goes 'Ollll' Blue Eyes', which we found both utterly baffling and hilarious.

[Benjm]

During the lockdown I've been listening to a lot of Allen Toussaint's work. I only just noticed this credit on 1996's Connected album:

Produced by Allen Toussaint and Clarence "Reginald" Toussaint.

[Various Artist]

The first CD album I ever owned (given to me at Christmas 1994) was Enigma's The Cross of Changes, and looking at this thread it's just popped into my head that the main man behind the project was credited in the liner notes under the none more rock'n'roll nickname of "Curly" Michael Cretu.

[Benjm]

In fairness, it scores on accuracy, if not dark glamour.




I wonder if Enigma's Amsterdam shows ever had to be halted due to Frank Rijkaard rushing onto the stage with a full mouth and bad intentions.

[WOM]

I wonder if Enigma's Amsterdam shows ever had to be halted due to Frank Rijkaard rushing onto the stage with a full mouth and bad intentions.

Like most of the Cryptic Crossword clues, I'm sure if I worked at it long enough I'd make sense of it. But....meh....

[Benjm]

Like most of the Cryptic Crossword clues, I'm sure if I worked at it long enough I'd make sense of it. But....meh....

Famous spitting incident at the 1990 World Cup.

[Gangster Octopus]

Like most of the Cryptic Crossword clues, I'm sure if I worked at it long enough I'd make sense of it. But....meh....

You're really not One Of Us are you...

[WOM]

You're really not One Of Us are you...

You know that guy staring blankly into the middle-distance on the Zoom calls as you all talk about Cruyff's haircut in game 2 of the '74 cup? Yeah....him....

[WOM]

Famous spitting incident at the 1990 World Cup.

Well, that's not very cricket.