Sheikh Your Moneymaker - English Premier League 2023-24

[Sean of the Shed]

You may claim it's too early to be starting the new season thread, but the fixture list is being released at 9.00am tomorrow morning.
Will there be two or three state-owned clubs battling it out?
Do Sheffield United count as state-owned as well?
Who's going to be joining Luton in the bottom three?
Can Spurs be considered a big 6 club any more?
Can Chelsea manage a top half finish?
Can Pochettino make it to Christmas?
Can I have a P please, Bob?

[Botswana Meat Commission]

380 games and then Manchester City win the league. Exciting.

[Snake Plissken]

[HeavyDracula]

I'm not saying that football has eaten itself but the Villa seem to have paid £1.7m for a sporting director...

[ursus arctos]

Which makes infinitely more sense to me than largely vibes based acquisitions of players for ten times more.

But that's just me.

[That Night In Barcelona]

I agree, you'll get a much better return (if he does his job well) than spending on a player I think - £1.7 million would get you what? A reserve-team full back?

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Can I be the first on this thread to hope that Everton are involved in another final day relegation battle? It's always such great fun and they do play the role perfectly.

[Foot of Astaire's]

Can I be the first on this thread to hope that Everton are involved in another final day relegation battle? It's always such great fun and they do play the role perfectly.

I'll confidently predict that Sean Dyche won't be there by the seasons end.

[That Night In Barcelona]

They're definitely following the Sunderland model of circling the drain - fire current manager mid season, new manager saves them from relegation, fire them the next season

Koeman > Allardyce > Silva > Ancelotti > Benitez > Lampard > Dyche

Bruce > Martin O'Neill > Di Canio > Poyet > Advocaat > Allardyce > Moyes

By my count, it'll be relegation next season.

[Ray de Galles]

Applause for the thread title.

Can we do one for every division based on The Black Crowes' album titles? I know, I know...

[Snake Plissken]

Applause for the thread title.

Can we do one for every division based on The Black Crowes' album titles? I know, I know...

Warnock-paint?
Three Snakes and one Charlton?
The Stockport Harmony and Musical Companion?

[Ray de Galles]

The Southern, Hellenic and Midland Companion?

[Snake Plissken]

I was going with the divisions, but that wins as well. Go for it.

[Sean of the Shed]

Buy Your Side would also be appropriate to the state-owned clubs.

[ad hoc]

Manchester City at Vincent Kompany's Burnley on the first day of the season.

[The Awesome Berbaslug!!!]

Which makes infinitely more sense to me than largely vibes based acquisitions of players for ten times more.

But that's just me.

It's literally nothing, If you could guarantee that your new director of football wasn't going use his network of contacts to rob you blind.

[Guy Profumo]

So

Who's the opening weekend Friday night game going to be?

(Won't be Luton, as their first home game is a live match banker)

[Scratch that, it's been announced]

[Patrick Thistle]

Brighton away isn't exactly the big opening glamour tie to mark Luton's first Premier League game. It feels like a div 3 fixture from 15 years ago.

[Snake Plissken]

So
Who's the opening weekend Friday night game going to be?

Champions vs Champions. Like the old rules on the Charity Shield.

[kokamoa]

Oh what a surprise! 2 of Everton’s last 3 games are against promoted sides. One year, I’d like to see the entitled fuckers try and stay up by finishing the campaign with games against Man City, Man Utd and a trip to Anfield.

[pebblethefish]

Arsenal at home on my 50th birthday. I can feel an epic day getting planned. TV had better not move it.

[Ray de Galles]

Lads, lads, it's mid-June!

The Ashes hasn't even started yet, let's not get in to PL fixture list chat

[Johnny Velvet]

For the most part I disliked The Black Crowes though weirdly I found Southern Harmony to be a great album. Largely because of Marc Ford, the sensational lead guitarist who played on it, really.

Spearmint Rhino, formerly of this parish, absolutely detested them, if I remember rightly.

[Capybara]

Am I the only one who thought it was a Fleetwood Mac (or Elmore James, even) reference?

[Sean of the Shed]

Am I the only one who thought it was a Fleetwood Mac (or Elmore James, even) reference?

It was, and to be fair to Ray I believe he realised that based on the tone of his post.