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    I just got your message, baby...



    So, I have just learned that the mighty Blow Monkeys, suave and somewhat camp soulcialists from the mid-80s, are coming back. Brighton Komedia on May 27, London Jazz Cafe on May 28 and 29. (And a new album on the way.)

    I've seen Dr Robert guesting at a T. Rex tribute gig recently and he's lost his lizardly figure, shall we say (haven't we all?), but I'm still gonna go.

    As a reminder of their fleeting magnificence, here is the young-David-Owen-resembling, letter-R-mispwonouncing Robert and his Monkeys at their peak:

    "Digging Your Scene" video
    "Wicked Ways" video
    "It Doesn't Have To Be This Way" video
    "Out With Her" on ToTP (complete with Bolanesque boa)

    (Sadly there's no clip of their equally wonderful early single, "Atomic Lullaby")

    Phwoar. Never mind Gay For Johnny Depp. I'd have gone Gay For Mid-80s Dr Robert, man.

    I saw them twice, back in the day. The first time they were supporting Lloyd Cole And The Commotions at Treforest Polytechnic, and I had no idea who they were.

    The second time, they were headlining the Hammersmith Odeon, and Curtis Mayfield joined them onstage. Curtis Mayfield was wearing khaki shorts and a pith helmet, like he was in It Ain't Half Hot, Mum.

    If only he'd been wearing it when that lighting rig fell on his head, eh.

    (By the way, as I was writing this, I was thinking "Man, this must be Wingco's least favourite bands ever..." and, lo and behold, when I click the genre "sophisti-pop" on The Blow Monkeys' Wikipedia page, it reads "It was subject to criticism at the time, especially from Melody Maker in the United Kingdom, mainly by Simon Reynolds and David Stubbs".)

    #2
    I just got your message, baby...

    I'm with the Wing Commander on this, I'm afraid.

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      #3
      I just got your message, baby...

      You and the Wing Commander are grotesque freaks.

      If anyone has a spare MP3 of "Wildflower" laying about, I'd be really grateful of that could be cared & shared.

      Comment


        #4
        I just got your message, baby...

        Thank you.

        Hey Horse, are you reading this? I'm wondering what you make of The Blow Monkeys, because they're arguably a proto-Orlando.

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          #5
          I just got your message, baby...

          Comment


            #6
            I just got your message, baby...

            The Blow Monkeys, eh. Cuh, that takes me right back to the sixth form common room. In fact, I've got an irresistible urge to wrap the end of a match in silver foil, heat it up and make it shoot across the table like a rocket. Then finally muster the courage to talk to Becky Blackham, who wears her baggy black jumper off one shoulder and looks so exactly like Kate Bush that she might as well have been cloned from her fingernail clippings. But fuck, what have I done? The bits from my grated cheese cob have gone all down the front of my shirt and made me look like a retarded simian who can't even get food into his own mouth, oh shit shit shit, why didn't I wait until I'd finished it? Perhaps she'll offer to pick the bits off herself. Perhaps she'll offer to lick the bits off herself. No, she's laughing. She's laughing and telling all her friends, and they're laughing. I wish I could just get up and walk off but I can't, because being in her presence, even when she's humiliating me in front of her friends, has given me an adolescent priapism, so I can't stand up, I've just got to sit here and try not to cry until they get bored and talk to someone who doesn't have grated cheese all down their shirt. "I know I'll die, aye, aye, bay-ay-by..."

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              #7
              I just got your message, baby...

              Beautiful.

              How do you do that match thing? I've never seen that.

              Comment


                #8
                I just got your message, baby...

                Well, you just wrap the end of a match in a little bit of silver foil, rest it on the edge of a table with the foiled end overhanging, then use another match or a lighter to heat the foil. When the match ignites, it flies across the table.

                Don't use a safety match, obviously.

                Anyway, 'Wait' - the one Dr Robert did with Kim Mazelle - that was good, too.

                Comment


                  #9
                  I just got your message, baby...

                  No, no. You use wooden matches, obv., and you put two head to head and wrap them together with tin foil. Then you can hold one stick or stick it in the ground or in the crack of a table. Then you heat the tinfoil.

                  If you want to know how to get a bunch of Stanley Cups stuck to the ceiling of your favourite pub, I can do that one, too.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I just got your message, baby...

                    In the unlikely event that anyone was planning to attend one of those gigs, I should let you know that they've now been cancelled, and replaced with a full UK tour later on in the year:

                    August

                    Sun 31 UK, Retrofest

                    September

                    Mon 1 UK, Newcastle, Academy 2

                    Tue 2 UK, Sheffield, Academy 2

                    Wed 3 UK, Cambridge, The Junction

                    Thu 4 UK, Bristol, Academy

                    Fri 5 Day Off

                    Sat 6 UK, Birmingham, Academy 2

                    Sun 7 UK, Liverpool, Academy 2

                    Mon 8 Day Off

                    Tue 9 UK, Brighton, Komedia

                    Wed 10 UK, London, Jazz café

                    Thu 11 UK, London, Jazz café

                    Fri 12 UK, Holmfirth, Picturedrome

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I just got your message, baby...

                      Looks to me more like an English tour than a UK tour.

                      [/chippy Scotsman]

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                        #12
                        I just got your message, baby...

                        Excuse me, Retrofest! Strathclyde Country Park!

                        Call yourself a Scot, and you've never heard of Retrofest?

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                          #13
                          I just got your message, baby...

                          Won't someone think of the Welsh?

                          (Where is Holmfirth, anyway?)

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                            #14
                            I just got your message, baby...

                            Anyway, surely the Holmfirth Picturedrome has to be the pick of the venues from that itinerary.

                            [IMG]br /http://www.moviebunker.com/picturedrome_holmfirth.jpg[/IMG]

                            They've even got a little statue of Freddie Mercury above the door.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I just got your message, baby...

                              OK, so "Holmfirth is a small town located on the A6024 Woodhead Road in the Holme Valley , in the Kirklees borough of West Yorkshire, England." I've never, ever heard of a gig happening there, though. What an odd choice. Maybe it's a band member's home town or something.

                              Comment


                                #16
                                I just got your message, baby...

                                Looking at its website, the Picturedrome seems to be an attractively quaint little venue with a reputation for putting on middle-order bands of a certain vintage (New Model Army, Blue Oyster Cult and Alabama 3 are forthcoming attractions). Perhaps Dr Robert is a Last Of The Summer Wine afficionado.

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                                  #17
                                  I just got your message, baby...

                                  Well I appreciated that Sam Kydd reference, GO.

                                  Comment


                                    #18
                                    I just got your message, baby...

                                    Excuse me, Retrofest! Strathclyde Country Park!

                                    Call yourself a Scot, and you've never heard of Retrofest?
                                    Haha, it's a fair cop, guv.

                                    Comment


                                      #19
                                      I just got your message, baby...

                                      Holmfirth is where Last of the Summer Wine was filmed. That's the only thing anyone knows about it.

                                      Comment


                                        #20
                                        I just got your message, baby...

                                        I think that Dr Robert has only scheduled a gig there because he liked the sound of the village just up the road: Upperthong. I reckon he just wants to have his photo taken, standing next to the sign.

                                        Comment


                                          #21
                                          I just got your message, baby...

                                          King Mob wrote:
                                          Anyway, surely the Holmfirth Picturedrome has to be the pick of the venues from that itinerary.
                                          Yeah, that picturedrome is gorgeous. Would be a great venue for a concert.

                                          Comment

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