Strange occurences while urinating

[ian.64]

Strange occurences while urinating

I once saw a man standing with his hands on his hips while he was urinating in the bogs at Heathrow Airport. His stance was one of a proud man, who was so in control of his genitals that he didn't need to touch them at all in order to guide the piss out of his member.

Yeah, we've got one of those people at work. He's also a bit...well, creepy. A couple of years ago, he had complaints from staff for his propensity to play with himself while working at his desk.

On a slightly unrelated note, I think that firearms and weapons should be given to those in society who stand over a toilet bowl to pee and leave pools of piss on the floor. If they can't hit a foot wide ceramic bowl whilst standing over it, then their chances of hitting anyone from five feet away with a semi-automatic is virtually nil.

[Stumpy Pepys]

Strange occurences while urinating

I had a piss next to Jonathan Ross once, at the Everyman cinema in Hampstead.

[beak]

Strange occurences while urinating

I had a piss next to Bobby Gould at St. James' Park once - he looked like a fucking tramp with the shoddiest gardening gloves I've ever seen sticking out of the pocket of his wax jacket, along with a twenty deck of Silk Cut.

The last time I told this story here was more memorable for the mockery I got for saying that I loomed over Kevin Keegan in the corridor. I fucking did though. Loomed all over him.

Anyway, I touch surfaces/fittings etc. in public toilets (not, like, gratuitously..) and have failed to die of any diseases so far. I'm not Howard bloody Hughes.

[Third rate Leszno]

Strange occurences while urinating

Incandenza wrote:

Squid Ink wrote:

I once saw a man standing with his hands on his hips while he was urinating in the bogs at Heathrow Airport. His stance was one of a proud man, who was so in control of his genitals that he didn't need to touch them at all in order to guide the piss out of his member.

I've seen guys do that. Also, the stance where a man leans with one hand on the wall, like taking a leak is exhausting and he really needs to rest.

I favour the one handed lean as it gives the added benefit of being able to see your old chap, something which sadly isn't possible in a vertical position unless I really suck my belly in.

[ad hoc]

Strange occurences while urinating

I once had a piss standing next to Bob Holness at Watford Gap services. I resisted the (not very strong) urge to make some "I'll have a P please Bob" gag.

More seriously, Harry, a year or two back I had this occasional and odd warm sensation that would run down my left leg (it wasn't connected to me actually pissing, though it felt almost exactly like I had pissed myself every time it happened). Anyway I was told by my doctor that it was very likely a circulation issue and may be a blood clot (which of course is dangerous because if the clot moves away from the leg, you could be in trouble). Anyway, I had that checked out and it wasn't that, and I was instead directed to a neurologist who decided it was probably a non-specific nerve condition, and prescribed something for that, which (touch wood) seems to have taken care of it. He speculated that it could be related to ingesting DDT which is not very heavily regulated in Romanian agriculture.

Anyway, if you've had it for 20 years, then presumably the circulation can be ruled out. The drug I took was called Milgamma which is available over the counter here, and might be worth having a bash at.

[steveeeeeeeee]

Strange occurences while urinating

I was having a half-time slash at the Luz a few weeks ago and a fully grown man came to the urinal next to me, undid his belt and trousers and let them, along with his boxer shorts, fall to his ankles before commencing urination.

I'm hoping my description gives the correct mental picture because it was frickin' weird.

[adidas beckenbauer super]

Strange occurences while urinating

I once had a piss into a well known Brazilian Celtic players water tank whilst i was working on his roof.The very fact that i was urged on by the two Celtic fans i was working with and who hated this expensive flop made me rest easy at night.This also is a warning of the dangers of drinking at work ...............

[beak]

Strange occurences while urinating

ABS: You're not talking Scheidt, are you?

[ad hoc]

Strange occurences while urinating

No he clearly said piss.

[adidas beckenbauer super]

Strange occurences while urinating

dogbeak wrote:

ABS: You're not talking Scheidt, are you?

Yes the much maligned Rafael,his big house in Mearnskirk Newton Mearns.Still he got off lightly two more Stella's and he would have been wondering why there was a funny smell and lots of flies buzzing around his bedroom.

[Toby Gymshorts]

Strange occurences while urinating

I didn't see him piss, but Rhys Ifans (physically) bumped into me as I was coming out of the bog at the Supergrass gig in Shepherd's Bush last week.

I should imagine he was doing quite a bit of leaning, as he was spotted at the bar about an hour earlier, ordering quadruple Vodka and Red Bulls. On a schoolnight too, the scamp.

[Bored Of Education]

Strange occurences while urinating

Does nobody else's phlegm taste of brazil nuts either?

AS you know, mine does when I have a cold.

As does my piss

[ian.64]

Strange occurences while urinating

I don't get you lot. How can you touch anything in a public bog, much less lean on something with your head?

Or, more to the point, what is it about work toilets or any kind of public toilets that cause men to become neurotic or just plain daft when entering them, if most stories here illustrate?

[WOM]

Strange occurences while urinating

I'd chalk it up to being the only place where you're out in polite society, amongst strangers, with your drawers down and your tackle hanging out. A bit of an odd situation, really.

[Ray de Galles]

Strange occurences while urinating

Bored Of Discipline wrote:

Does nobody else's phlegm taste of brazil nuts either?

AS you know, mine does when I have a cold.

I'm not sure I like the way that reads.