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    #51
    Originally posted by treibeis View Post
    I know. But the twat raising his index finger in the café said, "Nein, nein, nein, junger Mann, nicht DIE Baguette, sondern DAS Baguette. Von "DAS Baguettebrötchen"". Which would be all well and good, but we were talking not about a Baguettebrötchen, but about an actual Baguette. And, anyway, Duden says you can say both, so up yours.

    This all happened nearly 30 years ago, but now it's resurfaced, I'm fucking fuming. Instead of going to work today, I'm going to go out looking for The Twat In The Café and then fill him in. I probably won't find the actual culprit, but any bloke raising his index finger while talking - and God knows there are enough of them in this country - will do.
    Exactly the same thing happened to me, and it was in Hamburg about 30 years ago. I wonder if it was the same twat.

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      #52
      Originally posted by Alderman Barnes View Post
      Exactly the same thing happened to me, and it was in Hamburg about 30 years ago. I wonder if it was the same twat.
      My twat was in the café on the corner of Silbersackstraße and Reeperbahn. The café's still there, but it's now run by Iranians, so I doubt whether he still works there. If it were up to me, he'd never work anywhere, ever.

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        #53
        Should be fairly easy to find- Hamburg has a cricket club, just look for the ageing umpire.

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          #54
          Originally posted by treibeis View Post
          My twat was in the café on the corner of Silbersackstraße and Reeperbahn. The café's still there, but it's now run by Iranians, so I doubt whether he still works there. If it were up to me, he'd never work anywhere, ever.
          Was a different one, then. Having cast my mind back, I've remembered that mine was in Altona and it was a woman in a - wait for it - Backshop.

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            #55
            Originally posted by Alderman Barnes View Post
            Was a different one, then. Having cast my mind back, I've remembered that mine was in Altona and it was a woman in a - wait for it - Backshop.
            One of the best things to happen while I've been here was the advent of self-service bakeries. It was such a luxury to buy bread rolls without the person selling them to me shouting, "MannmannmannmannMANN! Was jetzt? Das? Das ist doch kein Nordfriesischer Roggenklotz! Das ist doch ein Dithmarscher Pferdeapfel!"

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              #56
              I'm confused, why are so people wandering round Hamburg asking for "the" baguette and not "a" baguette?

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                #57
                Hamburg a possible venue for Deutschland- NI in the Euros. Der/ Das/ Die Altona 11 Alster-thon, with a roggenklotz theme.

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                  #58
                  Originally posted by Walt Flanagans Dog View Post
                  I'm confused, why are so people wandering round Hamburg asking for "the" baguette and not "a" baguette?
                  I was paying for what I'd ordered at a table (i.e. not the entire bill), so it was "the baguette" as in "the only baguette on the bill".

                  There's also an old Hanseatic law that stipulates that only one baguette may exist in the city at any one time. People who fail to comply are drowned in a vat of Labskaus.

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                    #59
                    Originally posted by treibeis View Post
                    One of the best things to happen while I've been here was the advent of self-service bakeries. It was such a luxury to buy bread rolls without the person selling them to me shouting, "MannmannmannmannMANN! Was jetzt? Das? Das ist doch kein Nordfriesischer Roggenklotz! Das ist doch ein Dithmarscher Pferdeapfel!"
                    This remains one of my most traumatic German experiences. Not explicitly the bread types that treibeis names (I have no idea if they're real or made up), but having bread-names shouted at me by angry bakery-ladies who seem oblivious to the idea that anyone doesn't know the exact names of all 223 types of bread rolls in their massive case, and almost exploding when I try to point rather than use the correct nomenclature.

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                      #60
                      I also want to thank Alderman Barnes for making explicit the typo-change on this thread from Backstop to Backshop. I would not have noticed on my own, but now it's very satisfying.

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                        #61
                        Hasn't the thread moved on to Bakshop now?

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                          #62
                          Originally posted by Stumpy Pepys View Post
                          It's an old chestnut I always bang on about, but (at least in Bavaria), das Brot, die Semmel, der Bagel.
                          Oh, German grammar fetishists can get worked up about the correct article for Semmel. I think it's regional; in the south, it's feminine, and the further north you go, it's masculine -- or, more likely, das Brötchen.

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                            #63
                            Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                            Oh, German grammar fetishists can get worked up about the correct article for Semmel. I think it's regional; in the south, it's feminine, and the further north you go, it's masculine -- or, more likely, das Brötchen.
                            I'd never have known it was feminine. Round here it's Schrippe, anyway, and Semmel is something to do with breadcrumbs.

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                              #64
                              Never heard the word "Schrippe" before. So, to experiment, intuitively I'd say "die Schrippe". What is the correct article?

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                                #65
                                Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                                Never heard the word "Schrippe" before.
                                Seriously? Apart from alcohol and chips, that's the only source of carbohydrates Berliner have.

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                                  #66
                                  Originally posted by Alderman Barnes View Post
                                  Semmel is something to do with breadcrumbs.
                                  So I've heard, that's a new bit of the citizenship test. They come round your house and inspect your kitchen. And if you don't have a unopened packet of Semmelbrösel in your larder (best before: at least five years ago) and a three-quarters-full jar of Miracel Whip in your fridge, then you're not a proper German and you don't get the passport.

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                                    #67
                                    Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                                    Never heard the word "Schrippe" before. So, to experiment, intuitively I'd say "die Schrippe". What is the correct article?
                                    I'm amazed at that, but your "gen-dar" is absolutely faultless.
                                    Last edited by Alderman Barnes; 14-12-2018, 23:06.

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                                      #68
                                      How can you govern a country that has 246 names for a bread bun?

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                                        #69
                                        Originally posted by Alderman Barnes View Post
                                        I'm amazed at that, but your "gen-dar" is absolutely faultless.
                                        words ending with e are usually feminine.

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                                          #70
                                          I didn't know that, but now that you mention it, you're quite right. It's a good rule of thumb, but not a reliable indicator. Der Käse, das Finale, das Auge, das Ende, der Friede, der Kunde...

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                                            #71
                                            Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                                            I didn't know that, but now that you mention it, you're quite right. It's a good rule of thumb, but not a reliable indicator. Der Käse, das Finale, das Auge, das Ende, der Friede, der Kunde...
                                            Plus all the neuter substantivised verbs (or whatever they're called) beginning with "Ge-" (Gehabe, Getue, Gerenne, etc.). Plus the adjectival nouns (der Alte, der Gehörnte, etc.).

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                                              #72
                                              A woman with horns would be "die Gehörnte".

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                                                #73
                                                Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                                                A woman with horns would be "die Gehörnte".
                                                Yes, but that never happens.

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                                                  #74
                                                  You never met my sister-in-law's late mother-in-law.

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                                                    #75
                                                    Originally posted by G-Man View Post
                                                    A woman with horns would be "die Gehörnte"
                                                    Woman with single horn (oo-er)? Die Theresa mit seine Brexitscheissesturm

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