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Do you like talking on the phone?

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    Do you like talking on the phone?

    I read something years ago about men not liking to talk on the phone because we rely more heavily on non-verbal cues. Absent those, we get antsy very quickly.

    This is true for me. I can talk in person for ages, but on the phone I'm done-in after about three minutes. Seriously, that's my limit regardless of how much / how little I like the person I'm talking to. I just had to talk to my partner (work, not life) for about 9 minutes on my mobile and I was clawing my eyes out.

    You?

    #2
    I hate talking on the phone.

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      #3
      I spent much of my professional life doing it, but never liked it.

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        #4
        I'm not all that mad on talking.

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          #5
          Not so much anymore. Especially at work--for people outside of our office, I much prefer to communicate via email. We have files that we can upload email conversations to to keep in the record. When someone calls on the phone and wants to talk about something that can have an impact on what we are working on for them, it's much better to have written documentation of what they are asking for us. Also, a lot of times people will call up and ask a question that requires me to research something before I can answer them, but they want an answer right away. It's much easier to email for something like that.

          One thing that particularly annoys me is that on campus, pretty much every office has the same phone, which has a display and keeps a call history. You can see the caller ID of who is calling you, and if you don't answer the phone, you can see a log of missed calls, which are calls where people hung up and did not leave a voicemail. My rule of thumb is that if you call me and don't leave a message, or don't email me after I don't pick up the phone, then it must not have been an important call. I've ignored phone calls, not gotten a voicemail or an email from someone, and then they call back hours later cheesed off because I didn't call them back. They assume that I'll check who the missed call was from and immediately call back to find out what they were calling me about.

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            #6
            I spent much of my professional life doing it, but never liked it.
            Same. I can just about manage it in a professional context, but I hate it for personal stuff.
            I'm not all that mad on talking.
            This too. Given the choice, I wouldn't talk to anyone, on or off the phone.

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              #7
              I sort of hate calling, but not in the way that WOM describes. The length of the call is neither here nor there, 30 minutes or 30 seconds it's all the same. What it is is anywhere where I'm not 100% sure of my complete understanding of a topic and I will prevaricate madly before making that call (I'm actually doing precisely this by writing this post!). I suspect its the same thing, though - worrying about a lack of body language clues to guide me in any necessary bluffing.
              It isn't a problem at all in personal life. I don't tend to make long calls there either, but that isn't ending the call due to discomfort or anxiety. It's simply run out of things that seem worth talking about, so the conversation stalls. If I'm not required to hold up 50% of the conversation as is the case with the few people who do natter on when they call me, I'm happy enough holding on to the other end saying 'yes' 'uh-huh' occasionally for as long as they want to stay on the line.

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                #8
                I do enjoy talking on the phone to people I know at least reasonably well (either personally or at work.) Absolutely hate talking on the phone (or indeed in person) to people I don't know very well.

                I'm awful at face-to-face conversations though. I can't read body language at all and hate making eye contact, and generally seem to have a special gift for making people uncomfortable.

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                  #9
                  I love talking to my mother in law. But when she calls for L, it's pretty much...

                  "Hello."
                  "Hi! How are you?"
                  "Good...good..."
                  "What are you up to?"
                  "Not much... so .... here's L."

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                    #10
                    I hate talking on the phone, but if I need something I will always call. Email is a really hit and miss way of getting stuff done

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                      #11
                      Not a fan.

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                        #12
                        No. And I find that if somebody calls me without us agreeing to a phone call via text or email, I don't want to answer, so I usually don't.

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                          #13
                          My job has forced me to regard speaking on the phone as second nature, but I prefer talking face-to-face. There are so many cues people don't see on the phone, especially ones that lead the conversation to a natural conclusion.

                          My real preference given the choice is still an e-mail, though. You can stop for a minute, think about the situation and type out a carefully judged (yet detailed) reply.

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                            #14
                            Not a great fan, particularly when I have to do it for work. I often end up rehearsing in my head what I'm going to say, foreseeing what objections the person at the other end is going to have and coming up with lengthy justifications and rebuttals. Inevitably when I do actually phone they turn out to be very agreeable and the conversation ends up lasting less than a minute.

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                              #15
                              I completely freeze when a stranger is on the other end. It's cost me jobs.

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                                #16
                                I thought it was just me.

                                I hate using the phone and will do anything to avoid making a call either professionally or otherwise. Not that social phone calls are much of a thing nowadays with emails, texts and facebook enabling more than just a two-way conversation. My far better half is always moaning about my lack of vim when on the phone and that I rarely call her. She phoned about an hour ago to talk insurance documents and moaned about my monotone. In my defence it was about photocopying/ scanning and I was trying to nap after an early start and a long shift.

                                The only exception is my oppo at work with whom I'll happily natter for an age and on an almost daily basis. Mainly because our shifts rarely overlap and it's the only way to keep each other up to speed and he's also a good mate. All other work calls I'll avoid if I can and email instead. I almost never return calls even if asked, if they want me they'll get me.

                                My biggest gripe is how a ringing phone overrides all other conversations. People would soon get pissed off if random individuals jumped into discussions at a random point and not only completely changed the subject but ignored one half of them.

                                Even on a personal level I hate phoning tradesmen or call centres and do anything to avoid it. I thank the technological advances that are slowly eradicating the need for telephoning at all.
                                Last edited by Greenlander; 18-08-2017, 16:43.

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                                  #17
                                  No. It's my least favourite means of communication, and one of the reasons I don't have a smart phone.

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                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by Amor de Cosmos View Post
                                    No. It's my least favourite means of communication, and one of the reasons I don't have a smart phone.
                                    The longer I have a smartphone, the less I use it to make calls with.

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                                      #19
                                      Yeah...I used to wonder what the kids saw in texting. Then I started texting.

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                                        #20
                                        I don't like it much. When I was a kid after my parents divorced I had to call the other parent every Sunday and I always felt guilty when I didn't have much to say or talk about.

                                        However, I did often have long telephone conversations with one of my grandmothers and my godmother, and they were enjoyable. But they did most of the talking, and they've both passed away. Now I avoid the telephone as much as possible.

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                                          #21
                                          I'll text if I have to, but my fingers are too fat to do it well.

                                          I haven't measured it, and I'm not sure I could, but I suspect my use of electronic communication media is decreasing as I age. I'd rather hang-out and chat, or go on a long walk with someone, than send staccato messages into the ether.

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                                            #22
                                            I have to call the sausage wholesaler's once a week to place an order. I have to psyche myself up to do it, even though the exchange is usually:
                                            "Hello, treibeis here, I'd like ..."
                                            "Same as always? One hour from now?"
                                            "Yes."

                                            (And, no, I can't "automate" it. The weekdays vary.)

                                            Apart from that, I haven't made or received a phone call for about a year. I don't even speak to my father anymore. Bloody awful business.

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                                              #23
                                              I don't mind the phone. As with all interactions there are some phone calls that are better than others and some I know will be annoying before I start.

                                              Mrs Thistle gets really anxious about making any type of phone call and they are incredibly rarely worth getting worked up over. Which she admits afterwards. I don't have much sympathy now when she starts getting antsy about it. I usually just tell her to man up and get it over with because it is very unlikely to be anywhere nearly as bad as she thinks it is. The longer she puts it off the worse it will get in her head.

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                                                #24
                                                This why I decided not to become an author, an actor, or anybody else who has to promote their work through telephone interviews. If I can't use my irresistible, pleading eyes, I'm never going to persuade you of anything. All I've got left is a morose voice, which sounds insincere when it cheers up.

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                                                  #25
                                                  Chinese takeaway order is how I like a phone call - short, factual, just a few minutes in duration, followed by a usually successful outcome.

                                                  I try and make it obvious if someone calls who just wants to chat (1 remaining Aunt & ex) that I'm no fan - perfunctory responses, no attempt to make it a 2-way exchange, but apparently I'm not forceful enough, cos they can happily waffle on for 20-30 minutes. The ex does ask if I'm still awake every few minutes as I haven't said anything, to which I usually confirm that I'm not saying anything because I have nothing to say. Simple.

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