You know that you're getting old when...

[anton pulisov]

Piles are a legitimate reason to feel sorry for yourself!

[Sits]

Hairy arse cheeks.

[Hot Pepsi]

I recently discovered that I'm too old to be a member of the NYPD's scuba team. I'm also too unfit. In fact, I was probably never fit enough. Maybe when I was 22.
Somehow I just thought that sounded like a cool job so I looked them up on the web. Not that I thought I would go do it. I was just curious. But its demoralizing anyway.

[Gerontophile]

Hairy arse cheeks.

You just HAD to remind me of this.

[Hot Pepsi]

Hairy arse cheeks.

That started for me around 16. It's unfortunate. I have too much hair to shave it all off, but not enough that I could go for a full Wolvernie look. It just looks naff.

[Gerontophile]

Don't fancy a "back, crack and sack" then?

[Hot Pepsi]

Don't fancy a "back, crack and sack" then?

I don't know what that is, but I can guess, and no. It would just be too painful and it would grow back itchy.

I always thought it would be ok to do something that just removed all hair, but I think not having eyebrows would look weird.

[blameless]

You know you're getting old when your niece starts school, as mine did today.

Not helped by the fact that a) she's the spitting image of my sister, or b) she's going to the same school as me and my siblings did, so seeing my niece in the same uni as my wee sis is giving me mid-80s flashbacks...

[imp]

When as a referee you come out of your changing room in your warm-up gear, then one of the players looks at you and says, "Are you the opposition? I reckon we might win today!"

Cheeky cunt, although I did burst out laughing. And was even gentleman enough after his team lost 0-5 not to go up to him and say, "You lot were so shite I reckon I might have beaten you today."

[Gerontophile]

You know you're getting old when your niece starts school, as mine did today.

A niece of mine started school 35 years ago.

[Satchmo Distel]

My sister has a grandson, but not school age for another three years. Technically, I am old enough to be my entry level students' grandad (18 + 16 + 16).

[elguapo4]

A friend of mine became a grand uncle at 29!

[Bored Of Education]

A niece of mine is the head of the music department at her school and, more to the point, is about 5 years ahead of me in her teaching career.

[gjw100]

My grand-daughter starts school in 3 weeks. She will attend the same school as my daughter, who has already dressed her in her new uniform and, as near as possible, replicated the ‘first day of school’ photos that we took in our garden some 21 years ago. The resemblance is remarkable.

[3 Colours Red]

I am now closer to 40 than 30.

[ad hoc]

I am now closer to 40 than 30.

Me too

[anton pulisov]

Haha, I suspect most people on this board are.

[Patrick Thistle]

I'm closer to 50 than 30!

[jdsx]

Christ in a few weeks I'll be nearer 80 than 30. What a bloody depressing thought for a Sunday morning....
Hey ho, at least Gerontophile will be along soon...

[3 Colours Red]

That was my roundabout way of explaining that I've just turned 35. I know that's still sickeningly young by this place's standards.

[WOM]

Happy Birthday 3CR. I turned 50 on Tuesday.

[Benjm]

Belated birthday greetings, WOM. I said Belated...NO, BELATED...YES, I SUPPOSE IT IS FOR THE TIME OF YEAR...

I just saw a headline, 'Six Noughties Bands That Deserve A Comeback.'

Tempus bleeding fugit.

[Gerontophile]

Christ in a few weeks I'll be nearer 80 than 30. What a bloody depressing thought for a Sunday morning....
Hey ho, at least Gerontophile will be along soon...

Am I getting some sort of reputation on here? Quite possibly self-inflicted...

No, jdsx, you're safe enough. I don't 'do' Thistle fans. They're worse than bisexuals. (Insert evil smiley thing �� here.)

[Toby Gymshorts]

Am I getting some sort of reputation on here?

Gerontophile, earlier

[Lang Spoon]

Fuck sake Toby, give us some warning with the funnies. That's me almost had a wee leak while on the chuckles previous (Natalie Merchant), now I had the unpleasant sensation of laughing and swallowing a bit of baguette at the same time.