Wow Muuk, you seem to be really calm and rational about all of this but I'm sure behind all of this it's been tough. Sincerely hope that the progress you've seen so far continues.
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- Mar 2008
- 4915
- Amersfoort. NL
- Bristol City, RC Lens, Borussia Dortmund, Feyenoord, Bath Women's Roller Derby
- Nobosprits.
Bloody hell. This whole thread seems to have completely passed me by. Of course, one look at one of your recent posts, and the words skull, drill and conscious have had me reading it from start to finish.
Very brave, considering your fears Muuk. You always came over as a lovely bloke without even knowing about this. I'm so glad it all seems to have gone well. Modern medicine can be terrifying but amazing.
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Let's have yet another go at replying to this. The problem has been that I became very hyperactive and have had great difficulty in getting myself under control. If I can remember correctly what the surgeons told me, part of the procedure involves inserting microelectrodes. This is done so that they can cross reference where they think they are to where they actually are. Stimuli are applied to these microelectrodes and the patient reports back to the surgeon the effect: tingling in the fingers, double vision, head ache, are the most common. These stimuli are large signal, and are designed to test the boundaries of how large or small the actual stimuli might be. The insertion of the microelectrodes has a so-called "lesion" effect, which is practically the same as having a cure for the disease itself, which it isn't. I seem to be especially sensitive to this lesion effect, and I spent much of the next 48 hours creating havoc on social media. I was aware that I was sending rubbish messages to all and sundry, but I couldn't stop myself. Actually, perhaps a better explanation is that I didn't care to stop.
My attempts to post on here were hindered by my use of a telephone as the message medium, and, sure enough, sooner or later I hit the post button instead of the backspace. Once again, I was aware that I had done this, but it didn't seem to matter to me. Now that I've written all of that, I wonder how much of it is accurate, how much is a bit off target and how much is complete bollocks. The impulse unit is now turned on, both sides being set to the same, low figure. The lesion effect should last up to two weeks, at which point the impulse unit will need to be set to more realistic levels to keep me functional. On the negative side, I am really struggling with my memory. For example, did my hyperactivity start when they turned on the impulse unit, or was it already there? I know what I've written here -- that bit isn't the problem -- but is it true?
As for OTF's role in this? Well, who else apart from Balderdasha put the idea in my mind of equating what I was going through to a Caesarean section? Is it realistic to make such a comparison? I couldn't actually care less, what I do care about is that when I needed relief from the noise of the drill going through my skull, I was able to get it. The operation itself lasted a bit under an hour and a quarter per side. The bulk of the time appeared to be taken up with setting up the large signal stimuli, but I didn't have a very good view of what was actually going on, so I may be wrong on that point. A couple of mildly amusing points from the surgery. Firstly, when they were wheeling me around during the setting up phase, one of the nurses accidentally put me into an area feet first instead of head first, and consequently had to turn me round. This prompted me to break out into an overly loud rendition of the Thunderbirds theme tune. Secondly, in an attempt to reassure me, one of the surgeons told me that the drill stopped automatically once it was through the skull. I still haven't thought of a suitable reply to that one, or, indeed, if there is such a thing.
Finally, thankyou all of you for your continued support. This hasn't been easy, but you've made it easier.Last edited by Muukalainen; 17-02-2018, 13:08.
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Originally posted by ursus arctos View PostExcuse a banal question, but are you doing this in Finnish?
Originally posted by HORN View PostDunno if this is an appropriate comment but reading Muuk’s posts is terribly exciting. I seem to read them so quickly; manically if you will.
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Thanks nef, Sits, HORN, ursus et al. It certainly wasn't my initial intention to write it up as a blog -- -- to be honest, at the beginning I was plain shit scared of what I was being forced to face, and my posts on here dealt with those fears... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... as you can see from my rudimentary morse code, I've been spending some time chewing over nef's last message. I've already got a blog, not that anyone reads it, so I might as well have one that some people are going to read.
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Time to put this thread to bed. After a lot of thought, I decided to take up nef's idea and am now writing up my experiences with Parkinson's as a blog. For those of you who are interested, you can find it here. A final thankyou to you all for your support and kind words.
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