Today's armchair football

[Borracho]

Arsenal survive a nervy second half against ten-man Newcastle to win 1-0, but again look anaemic up front.

Meanwhile, Liverpool are trailing at home to West Ham after a piece of lax covering from their greatest ever left-back.

[wiblflibl]

Today's armchair football

Deal Town FC 0-0 Horsham FC - FA Cup, via Twitter:

HFC - Darren Boswell injured. Shaun Charles on.

DTFC - Charlie Dickens booked.

[Diable Rouge]

Today's armchair football

And Noble makes it two, so looks like Rogers' title tilt is up a creek already.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

Lovren is utterly brutal. A litre of milk turns quicker than he does.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

Lolvren

[Snake Plissken]

Today's armchair football

I thought it was the home games that Liverpool were going to be comfortable with.

Bristol City 0 Burnley 2 - even the Clarets commentators are calling this the biggest steal since the Great Train Robbery. Bristol City have battered us for 45 minutes.

[wiblflibl]

Today's armchair football

Sloppy goalkeeping by HFC's Gareth Williams and it's Deal who open the scoring just before the break.

HT Deal Town 1-0 Horsham

[delicatemoth]

Today's armchair football

Ranieri has changed Leicester's starting line-up for the first time in four PL games, with the consequence that they were very poor and Bournemouth are well worth their 1-0 lead (Wilson again).

[Gangster Octopus]

Today's armchair football

The Liverpool game's on Sultana in the club house, so we didn't get Jeff Stelling at halftime.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Oh dear.
Coutinho sent off.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

He was already on a yellow and he decides to commit a lunge on Payet, some 20 yards inside the West Ham half. Either he wanted to get sent off for some weird reason or he's brain-dead.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

'Oo the facking 'ell is this facking geezer on co-commentary?
His accent is making my teef itch.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Jebus!

Danny Ings.
Pure forgot about him.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

Chelsea slip behind at home to Palace, with 25 mins to go.

Mourinho responds by throwing on Falcao.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Lovren commits three fouls in one challenge.

He's a genius.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Falcao must score sometime.

In theory.

[Tony C]

Today's armchair football

Calvert wrote: Jebus!

Danny Ings.
Pure forgot about him.

So had I.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Cheeky scamps are going all-out for a third here..
Liverpool's marking from corners is atrocious.

[Calvert]

Today's armchair football

Noble harshly dismissed.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

Falcao actually scores!

But within a minute, Joel Ward puts Palace back in front. There's something drastically wrong at Chelsea.

[tee rex]

Today's armchair football

Liverpool-Chelsea sack race hotting up.

Oh, the Schadenfreude glass is overflowing today ...

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

Today's armchair football

Too nerve-wracking. The joy at Mourinho suffering another "fake" result would be too great.

[Borracho]

Today's armchair football

Sakho walks through a dozing Liverpool defence to slot home number three.

This must be their worst home defeat in a number of years surely. Chelsea 4-1 in 2005?

[delicatemoth]

Today's armchair football

Hmmm. For a split second I thought a dachsund was trotting along the touchline, but it turned out to be some advert animation. The last time I went to a PL game was before these moving adverts had appeared. Are they irritating and distracting at the match?

[wiblflibl]

Today's armchair football

Jordan Clark heads in from a Kieron Pamment corner to equalise.

FT Deal Town 1-1 Horsham

Replay Monday.