The Apprentice

[JtS]

The Apprentice

There's one called Michael?

Once again Sir Alan's assistants were spot on with their analysis of the teams, Simon was completely undermined before he even started, but Sir Alan was right that he was in over his head.

Helene got really lucky that her team won, she would have been out the door before you could say, "You're fired"

[Guest]

The Apprentice

Michael is doing ok, on the losing team again last night but hasn't been brought into the boardroom yet so must have some level of competence. He's fairly irritating, although that seems to have been a prerequisite for this series.

This show used to my one of my favourites but it is rapidly descending into the quagmire of zany, over-aggressive, playing-to-the-cameras reality tv bullshit. To fire Simon was I suppose fair enough on this occasion. However what was the point of giving that gobby one another chance? Alan Sugar is never ever going to employ someone so confrontational, he knows it, I know it, even she has probably realised it.

I can now say I don’t like any of the remaining contestants. They are all either completely belligerent or have devious, insincere tactics. And the worst thing is, that whenever someone doesn’t fit one or both of these profiles, they are accused of being naïve and “not up it”.

Also I agree that some of the tasks shouldn’t be about sales and measured by profit.

[JtS]

The Apprentice

What would you measure them by, how many people they make smile?

Smiles don't hit the bottom line sunshine, you're fired.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

I suppose it's about time I started watching this series. I usually give it a few weeks so the complete no-hopers have been cast off and there's a bit more time to concentrate on the survivors.

[Ginger Yellow]

The Apprentice

The one with the pub theme nights was staggering in its "it shows these people up as utterly worthless tits you'd run a mile from"ness. The two groups fucked it up about as much as you possibly could. The boys bought their food from a supermarket, including shitty ready made pizzas and Dolmio, for fuck's sake. And they dared to give their customers half a pizza.
Meanwhile the girls get the food before they know what the menu is. It's only because they managed to blag everything that they won.

[Guest]

The Apprentice

I had a whole reply written out to this but when reading it back it sounded like one of those shitty management courses I have been unfortunate to have been on. I wouldn't inflict it on you.

I'm converted, measure it on sales alone and if they take a shit on society while they're doing it, all the better.

[noj]

The Apprentice

I'm off for lunch with the prime minister now. --- what a wanker siralan is.

Heh. exactly. Big whoop suralan, wanna fight about it?

I'm looking for a vaguely likeable one but haven't found one yet. Claire is the new Ruth Badger.

[JtS]

The Apprentice

Good one last night.

So they changed the goal. Sales rather than profit.

But for the second week in a row the winning team got lucky, they dicked up the production, they dicked up the market research, they dicked up pre-sales. And they got lucky with one big sale.

I thought Lucinda, depsite losing, did a really good job, and was pleased that Sir Alan saw that. His advisors continue to call it well. If Lucinda did one thing badly, it was in the boardroom dragging Helene in unnecessarily.

Good choice for Lindy to go, she ballsed up her role as sales manager.

[Guest]

The Apprentice

I was most annoyed that the PM of the other group got away with it. She's a mardy cow and needs to go. Mind you the irish girl that survived (Jo?) was lucky, I just couldn't get on with someone that aggresive and there's no need or place for someone like her.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

I don't understand how this series is any less watchable than previous ones. Certainly the competitors seem pretty interchangeable with those from any other year.

One of the things that continues to make the show such a pleasure to watch are the skills of the editing team. There's hardly a comment made that isn't illustrated by a telling gesture or expression from one of the other competitors (and I'm certain, of course, that none of these reactions are dropped in opportunely from other confrontations... that would be highly unethical).

Oh, and another lookie-likey to go along with the Vicky Pollard clone - Alex Wotherspoon and the geeky lad from Primeval. Watch next time, it is him.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

Last one next week, then, and in a shock move, Sir Alan is unable to whittle the candidates down to the usual showdown twosome, so four prospective apprentices go into the final task with their hopes intact.

The interviews are always one of the most entertaining and revealing stages of the selection process, and the sight of one of Sir Alan's cohorts effortlessly persuading Lee to impersonate a 'reverse pterodactyl' was a real highpoint. Loss of kudos for persuading the predictably awful Karen Brady to join the interviewing team, however.

I found myself wondering whether the programme makers will be under any pressure to ensure a woman wins this series? If not, three of the four successful candidates will have been men, which could be construed as hardly sending out the correct signals.

[Ginger Yellow]

The Apprentice

"Loss of kudos for persuading the predictably awful Karen Brady to join the interviewing team, however."

Indeed. I almost punched my TV when she said "I was running Birmingham City at your age". Yes, Karen, but that's because your porn baron boss bought it.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

And while the other, wilier chorts are embarrassing the candidates by enticing them to impersonate pterosaurs and uncovering glaring mistruths on the CV's, Karen Brady asks one of them to... sell her a pen.

[caja-dglh]

The Apprentice

In fairness, the sell me a pen interview routine can really give some strong signals on how a person thinks.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

I'm not saying it's completely without worth, but it's a safe and familiar routine to drop in. I mean, if I was interviewing someone for a recruitment position, I'd be looking for a more inspired answer than "Well, I'd get them to sell me my pen" if I posed the question "How might you go about finding out if the candidate is any good at sales?"

[Guest]

The Apprentice

Oh come on people,get a grip.Everyone on this show is an actor who is given a script every week that they have to learn.Your the goodie this week and i'm the baddie etc.This is tv we are talking about.

[JtS]

The Apprentice

The final 3 will be, Simon (army dude), irish girl and tall girl (did the cooking last week)

Well, I called that!

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

Well that's it ruined for me.

To return to the issue I mentioned earlier, should Alan Sugar choose a female apprentice this time round, thereby 'sending out the right signals'?

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

Because he hasn't. Sorry, love, you just hit the glass ceiling.

[Mumpo]

The Apprentice

But let's remember this series for the right reasons. Like tonight, giving us an absolute all-time, stone-cold moment of television genius.



"Remember - roulette equals gambling equals debt equals MISERY"

[Bored Of Education]

The Apprentice

What a twat Sugar is. He should have given it to Claire at the start and saved us 12 weeks of those unshaven idiots, one fo which he has chosen

[Mighty Mudhsuden]

The Apprentice

Given what to Claire?

[Finbarr Saunders/]

[Muzz Lightyear]

The Apprentice

I can't believe that no one on here has mentioned the kosher chicken debacle.