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    #26
    WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

    Sorry about that. Massive Powercut (to the brain.)

    14: The Netherlands (please be good).

    Its an 'Every Breath You Take' rip off. Sting and the other Police will be pissed off. Fuck, Puff Diddy will even be pissed off.

    No redeeming features.

    Next: 15: Montenegro.

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      #27
      WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

      Church bells... this bodes... for a Celine Dion... yep.

      Male version. (The video should have a diabetes warning. FUCK RIGHT OFF.)

      Seriously. FUCVK OFVF.

      Next: 16: Hungary.

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        #28
        WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

        I hate it.

        It has possibilities. wow, after 47 seconds, it kicks up a notch from dirge to ... oh, back to dirge, but singer went up a gear.

        Pretty good. (Song about Daddy leaving, in English, before you bitches comment)

        If anyone else is stupid enough to listen to this, it reminds me of someone else, BIGTIME.

        Should qualify.

        And that is it. (For the first semi-final.)

        Give me 20 minutes to get that pre-booked lobotomy, and I will be back, fighting fit, for the runners and riders of the second thing, which I will not call a semi. Not even close.

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          #29
          WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

          Ladies and gentlemen, Seconds out (finally found out what that meant) Round two.

          First up, my favourite and yours:

          1: Malta. (I think I might need a drink for this. And I am literally 1 second into the video) (Oh Ronnie is 6-3 up.)

          OH FOR FUCK SAKE. World war 1 video... which goes into those cunts who are faux gypsies... whats their name?

          Yes, THEM.

          I FUCKING HATE THIS WITH A PASSION BEYOND MY DEATHBED. CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAANts.

          Catchy though. Even though it sounds like M*Mf*rd * C*nt*

          One good thing. The keyboard player is female, and can hit a BIG note.

          However: FUCK OFF. Hateful.

          Comment


            #30
            WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

            2: My favourite and yours: Israel (How VERY European). (Song is called 'Same Heart'. Tell that to Benyamin, with no heart.)

            Intriguing. RAWK, but disco, kitchen, but sink too. (Video is fucking awful, but I have listened without watching, which is the point, I think... I really like this. Language swap, too, which is massive plus. Russia and this so far... until she sang 'Im skinning you up'.)

            huit points. (not too shabby, and the singer is rather ... warm, too, although she got her camel toe out, which is not a good look on anyone.)

            Ahem.

            Comment


              #31
              WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

              3. Norway. Preconceptions suggest this will go either way. So, its just as well that I am too stupid to have any, innit?

              (Silent Storm. Tautology, right there.)

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                #32
                WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                Slow... but really good.

                (if it stays this way, we have a close run thing.)

                Think 'Jules Verne's' version of Mad World (yes I know, sing it underwater.)

                If this guy... damn it. Just as I say 'if he sits at a piano, and plays this' there is a tiny crescendo.

                It ends.

                Ladies and gentlepeeps, that was really good. Carl Espen. Nice one.

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                  #33
                  WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                  Breath back. That was rather smart. Quiet, more quiet, poignant, slight lift, then back to quiet, and an ending which you will not believe.*

                  That was a keeper.

                  *if anyone wants to know the ending, ask me.

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                    #34
                    WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                    4: Georgia.

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                      #35
                      WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtEWm7Rwv4U (LONG version, and quite mental, but brilliant.)

                      (Short version) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9ixkdkbieU

                      Decide for yourselves.

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                        #36
                        WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                        I can honestly say, I have never heard anything like that before (in Eurovision). It is anti-music.

                        Brilliant. Just brilliant. It wont win, of course, but fuck me. Now it's a semi.

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                          #37
                          WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                          5: Poland.

                          Handclaps.

                          Oh shit.

                          "Slavic girls, we know how to use our..."

                          Wont go down well, with gay men. Except... its shit. Quite offensive, actually. I probably shouldn't mention the video. There are youg girols with tits, and clap s, sorry, claps.
                          Shit, I have lost the will to spell. And scold.

                          Fuck off.
                          Next up is...

                          Comment


                            #38
                            WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                            6: Austria. (No preconceptions, remember?)

                            Bond theme.

                            Winner. For so many reasons.

                            Comment


                              #39
                              WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                              7:... sorry, That was fucking spectacular, with or without the video.

                              7:Lithuania (follow, THAT!)

                              Really. Imagine Taylor Dayne, but in English. Yes.

                              Not bad, but will be overlooked, because of previous. (Some gymnastics. But not from the lovely lady. Bald twat. No, the guy who is beside her.)

                              Comment


                                #40
                                WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                Shame really. Not too shabby.

                                8: (

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                                  #41
                                  WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                  Slightly indie, slightly powerpop, its very ... its pretty good. (Overtones of Undertones, if that doesnt help. Literally.)

                                  I thought the Greeks would win last year. This might come top 3 in a pretty shitty year (with some strong favourites.)

                                  If they can do THIS on the night, this has a big chance.
                                  BIG chance. (But no twins, tits, or indeed ... well you can wait and see.)

                                  Comment


                                    #42
                                    WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                    Which brings us to

                                    NINE: IRELAND. (deep breath)

                                    Comment


                                      #43
                                      WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                      Good song, good singer, but why is there the fucking diddly dee in the background? Strip the shit out of it, and there is a great tune there.

                                      AND, she is ultra hot!
                                      (here play that flute, it is compulsory.) Twats.

                                      Comment


                                        #44
                                        WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                        DAMN!

                                        That is fucking annoying.

                                        OK 10:Belarus (Cheesecake. No, seriously)

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                                          #45
                                          WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                          No.

                                          11: FYR Macedonia (the other one will be along later)

                                          Not bad. Expect Pink like cavorting (with either gender.)

                                          NICE FINISH.
                                          That was a lot better than it should have been... possibilities... Nice eurobeat, and (maybe) if she can sing, there is a top note... Qualifier, easily.

                                          Quick pause, for resusc... learning to spell breathe.

                                          Comment


                                            #46
                                            WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                            12: Switzerland.

                                            A very awkward song.

                                            There is something in there, which ...

                                            Comment


                                              #47
                                              WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                              Ah fuck it.

                                              I like this. (AGAIN sounds like M*m etc)

                                              Sans whistles. (sifflements?)

                                              Not bad. Qualifier.

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                                                #48
                                                WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                                13: Greece.

                                                KOM ON.

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                                                  #49
                                                  WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                                  There is a possibility, that ... wait... damn it.

                                                  There is a massive Khorus waiting to happen...

                                                  Bugger. Half a tune. I bet even those two's horses are gay.

                                                  Comment


                                                    #50
                                                    WONDERFUL WONDERFUL, COPENHAGEN

                                                    No chance.

                                                    Next 14:

                                                    Slovenia.

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