Gary Speed

[Fausto]

Gary Speed

[http://www.walesonline.co.uk/footballnation/football-news/2011/11/27/devastated-john-hartson-speaks-of-shock-over-gary-speed-death-91466-29851973/] Moving tribute from John Hartson

[wingco]

Gary Speed

I hadn't been aware of the business with Howard Kendall until today.

[Fausto]

Gary Speed

Gary Speed certainly wasn't the type of player who didn't show-up.
He was one of the few big name player during the late 90's and early '00s who always turned up for Wales.

[Duncan Gardner]

Gary Speed

Very sorry to hear this, condolences to his family and friends.

[Disco Child Ballads]

Gary Speed

Very sad. I guess my biggest memory of him is as a part of the Wales squad that almost qualified for Euro 2004. I saw a lot of the games in that campaign and he was an important part of that team. Wales' failure to qualify that time was a heartbreaking moment but this is more so.

[Jorge Porbillas]

Gary Speed

I've tried to put my thoughts into words, but I'm not sure it does the man justice:

http://www.s4c.co.uk/sgorio/e_/cofio-gary-speed

[Paul S]

Gary Speed

That really is a lovely piece.

[Duncan Gardner]

Gary Speed

Nice article, Jorge.

[Central Rain]

Gary Speed

My favourite player back in the days when I still had such things as favourite players. Very difficult to get my head around what has happened.

[Sixmartletsandaseagull]

Gary Speed

Paul S wrote:

That really is a lovely piece.

Yes, lovely.

[Nico Rijnders]

Gary Speed

Yes, a fine piece Jorge.

Just to echo what everyone has said. Heartbreaking and incomprehensible news.

Most things I've read and heard today have mentioned how close he was to his father. Can't begin to imagine what he and the rest of the family must going through.

[ursus arctos]

Gary Speed

Well done, Jorge.

I'm quite proud that the two best tributes that I've read today have come from people I've come to know through OTF.

It's a small ray of hope in the gloom.

It's also essential that those of us who are men in midlife, and who, by nature and custom, tend not to talk, write or even acknowledge the reality of depression and the demons that accompany it, take this opportunity to do so, and to let everyone else know that doing so isn't selfish or a sign of weakness, but rather an essential step on the road to recovery.

If this tragedy helps advance that cause, Speed will not have died in vain, and those he has left behind will another brilliant memory to cherish.

[Bored Of Education]

Gary Speed

I have come back to this as, through talking to people, I have somewhat order my thoughts and emotions a bit more.

I will be brutally honest and say that, for a second, my thought was "...and we were just getting good". After that that, the stupid detached unreality of football left and the horrible realisation of a man 3 years younger than me with a young family, let alone one that I admired as a player and manager, had hung himself came crushing down upon me.

I feel a touch false feeling so absolutely shit about this. I hadn't met the guy and I didn't know him apart from on TV and watching him at football matches. Yes, I have had a lot of emotional involvement in games that he has played in and managed but that still doesn't stop me feeling like what the fuck am I upset about, he has a wife and children left.

The only way I can put it in words is that regularly today I have really really wanted to put the clock back to yesterday when this hadn't happened. The last time I felt like this about someone I didn't know was when John Peel died.

Interestingly, I had a chat with a Man City supporter who I speak to a lot about football and he brought up how the death of Marc Vivien Foe had affected Man City supporters.

What I do know is that if Lemmy or Iggy Pop died tomorrow, I would be upset but there wouldn't be the impact that this has had. For a young man who has, in no way, achieved all that he could have is, well, tragic doens't cover it. I now that I have wanted to keep away from the rolling coverage, am not sure I want to watch MOTD2 tonight and, presently, can't look forward to any Wales match for a long time. I am sure that anything done will be done with the greatest of sympathy and respect but I don't how anything could make anything better.

I just feel so sorry for obviously his family but also people like Bellamy, Savage and those lads at Swansea today who have played for him. Like Billy Sharp, it could be that it was the only thing that they felt they could do was to play a football match but I wouldn't swap places with them for the world

[Freestyling buck wilding Stijn Stijnen]

Gary Speed

wingco wrote:

I hadn't been aware of the business with Howard Kendall until today.

May I ask, what is that Wingco?

My Dad also took his own life in 1988, and I feel the biggest problem he had was having no-one to talk to about the pressures of life.

It is so sad that he ultimately had nowhere to turn, I have my thoughts on why he may not have had, but this isn't the time to share them, so all I can say is what a terrible loss.

And Jorge, good work fella.

[Glass Half Empty]

Gary Speed

Terrible, just terrible. Although he came to Sheffield United in the twilight of his career he went on to both captain and manage the club and despite the difficult times for the club that coincided with his time with us, he always came across as a class act, a genuine, honourable man. At no time did he lose the respect of the fans, the fans recognised what a difficult hand he had been dealt when he took on the manager's job. This is a mark of the man when one considers the fury that the fans have directed at the other key players over the last 3 or 4 years. R.I.P Gary.

[Bored Of Education]

Gary Speed

It's also essential that those of us who are men in midlife, and who, by nature and custom, tend not to talk, write or even acknowledge the reality of depression and the demons that accompany it, take this opportunity to do so, and to let everyone else know that doing so isn't selfish or a sign of weakness, but rather an essential step on the road to recovery.

This is another aspect to this that I think distresses me. I have been through many emotional problems over the last 10-15 years that, in their own way, have taken me to the absolute rock-bottom, which I have talked about before on here. However depressed or hopeless I felt, I never contemplated suicide luckily and, maybe, down to love for my family and it was that in the end that drove me to seek a way out of my problems.

The thought that Speed was so much lower than I was and so emotionally distraught that even the thought of leaving his family couldn't stop him is genuinely horrific. It has also occurred to me that for years now I think that a lot of people have been genuinely fearful that Paul Gascoigne was going to do something like this due to his well-publicised problems and yet whatever has driven Speed to this has never come to light.

That "Football's not a matter of life and death" quote looks like even more crap now

[Jimmy Bignutz]

Gary Speed

It was a joke.

[Bored Of Education]

Gary Speed

Yes, I love Shankly and realise that his original quote was a joke but it is repeated often enough without that realisation.

[Jorge Porbillas]

Gary Speed

Thanks for the kind words everyone.

The fact that Speed was texting a good mate of mine taking the piss out of him on TV at about half past four yesterday afternoon makes the whole thing even more unfathomable.

To go from being his normal self to the dark place which he arrived at this morning is just too mind boggling for me to understand.

[Reed John]

Gary Speed

I can't find the words.

[Sam]

Gary Speed

RIP. Not sure what else to add, really. Nice words, Ian and Jorge.

[Reed John]

Gary Speed

He was my favorite player on FIFA 96 for the Sega because I liked his name. I won the World Cup with Wales. I used him again with Newcastle on the PS1. I loved his name. I was excited to see him play with NUFC against DC United. A few months ago, I saw a segment on one of those shows all about him. He seemed to be very content with his coaching career and I thought he was a great role model for ex-players.

[Bored Of Education]

Gary Speed

Just seen the footage of Shay Given at Swansea and it didn't even occur to me his connection to Speed. What a nightmare for him. I can't help thinking that, had the Swansea game had been later, a fair few players might have had to do a Bellamy and it was only shock that had them playing

[Reed John]

Gary Speed

What is Given's connection? I don't know.

[Brandenburger Toro]

Gary Speed

They were at Newcastle together for... ages.