A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

[Torcida]

The history of the Houston Texans is a history in futility. They have zero playoff appearances since taking the field for the first time in 2002.

For fans of historical revisionism in the NFL, the story of the Texans is a wonderful opportunity to rewrite history. So now thanks to a videogame, we are going to do just that.

We will join the Texans in 2003 and continue the journey through to the present day. By the time we get to the current era, the Texans will surely look a lot different. Just how different we can only find out.

We will use Madden 2004, the finest ever Madden, but we will not play the games. We will draft players (real ones) and sign free agents and act as the GM of the Texans, but when it comes to the games themselves, we will sim the regular season and then "watch" any playoff games (you set it to play CPU vs CPU and sit back and watch the game unfold; it is curiously compelling, especially with such a magnificent version of Madden).

I plan to create an NFL Camelot through assembling the most brilliant athletes of their day in Houston, the fastest, strongest, most agile competitors, and so assemble a true NFL dynasty that will stand the test of time.

I will update you on all my moves as GM and tell you how the team does every season and together, we will write a new history of the Houston Texans.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Our story begins in 2003, after the second of the Texans' drafts.

You can see who they have selected in their first two years of existence, and in their initial expansion draft, here.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Although it will be the lesson of history that the expansion draft and the first two NFL drafts of the Texans resulted in one superstar (Andre Johnson) and a bunch of stiffs, this would not have not been apparent when this game was written in 2003.

In this videogame alternative reality, David Carr is a big, strong-armed young QB, a former first overall-pick in the draft.

So we are starting with some advantages over the historical Texans. In fact the overall roster bequeathed to us even has some strengths. Although Tony Boselli is very injury-prone, he is at least still on the roster, and is at least in theory, still a franchise tackle.

Two other players taken in the expansion draft by the Texans are of note - CB Aaron Glenn and DE Gary Walker. They are both excellent players in the videogame.

So we are already have a potentially explosive young QB-WR duo, a bookend OT, a stud DE, and a shutdown CB.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

There are one or two other solid players on the rest of the roster, but the overall picture is of desperate mediocrity, and overpaid mediocrity at that. The Texans in real-life bought in a bunch of very average guys on big salaries in order to fill out their roster, and the result is that we are immediately right up against the salary cap because of all the bloated salaries on the team.

Guys like Carr, Johnson and Boselli are all on massive salaries, but so are much more average players like Jamie Sharper, Steve McKinney, Zach Wiegert, Kailee Wong, Jay Foreman, Marcus Coleman and Kris Brown.

And overall, this is a very slow team. Most of our backups are very lumbering, which will make for poor special teams play.

So we are going to start off by aggressively pruning the team, then we'll try to upgrade the talent and speed on it by bringing in guys off the street.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

CUT:

Tony Banks, 67
James Allen, 67
Jason Lamar, 55
Patrick Chukwurah, 61
Erik Flowers, 54
Jarrod Baxter, 70
Moran Norris, 67
Matt Stevens, 71
Kenny Wright, 64
DeMarcus Faggins, 62
Jason Simmons, 62
Charles Hill, 63
Howard Green, 58
Shannon Taylor, 60
ROLB#99, 63
Chad Stanley, 70
JaJuan Dawson, 65

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

STREET FREE AGENTS SIGNED:

Larry Centers, 88 (6.6/7)
Ronnie Bradford, 79 (7.9/7)
Terry Fair, 74 (9.8/7)
Juran Bolden, 76 (11.7/7)
Deion Sanders, 78 (13.1/7)
Steve Martin, 81 (13.6/7)
Chester McGlockton, 78 (10.4/7)
Dominique Stevenson, 55 (3.4/7)
Darren Hambrick, 70 (7.5/7)
Corey Moore, 59 (4/7)
Randall Godfrey, 88 (2.8/1)
Tom Rouen, 79 (5.3/7)
Michael Westbrook, 79 (2.9/1)

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

RE-NEGOTIATED:

Kailee Wong (4.2/1)
Jay Foreman (3.1/1)
Charlie Clemons (2.3/1)
Marcus Coleman (5.2/1, 45.5/7)

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

As a result of these changes, we've created the basis for our stout new 4-3 D, bringing in two strong DTs, Chester McGlockton (ranked 78, strength 92) and Steve Martin (ranked 81, strength 89).

We've also re-vamped the LB corps, bringing in a ton of speed - Corey Moore is speed 83, Dominique Stevenson is 78 and Darren Hambrick is speed 77. These guys will help out on special teams and maybe more going forward.

We've also re-negotiated the contracts of over-paid, slow LBs like Kailee Wong, Charlie Clemons and Jay Foreman. They'll be off our books next year, freeing up a lot of cap room.

We've also added a lot of speed in the secondary, where Ronnie Bradford is our new FS, and Deion Sanders, Terry Fair and Juran Bolden all add depth behind CB starters Aaron Glenn and Marcus Coleman.

Finally, we've added some significant value in starting FB Larry Centers, starting WR Michael Westbrook and starting MLB Randall Godfrey.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

PRE-SEASON:

Carr +3 to 86
Ragone +2 to 69
Davis +1 to 67
Johnson +3 to 85
Joppru +2 to 73
Pitts +2 to 72
Stevenson +2 to 57

Good advances by both DAVID CARR and ANDRE JOHNSON, which augurs well for their future together.

[Incandenza]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

I love it. Don't ever stop, Torcida.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Incandenza wrote:

I love it. Don't ever stop, Torcida.

Glad you like it!

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

So here is our YEAR 1 roster:

QB

David Carr (1) 86
Dave Ragone ® 69
Mike Quinn (6) 62

HB

Stacey Mack (4) 80
Jonathan Wells (1) 70
Domanick Davis ® 67

FB

Larry Centers (13) 88

WR

Andre Johnson ® 85
Corey Bradford (5) 80
Michael Westbrook (8) 79
Jabar Gaffney (1) 77
Avion Black (3) 58

TE

Billy Miller (3) 81
Bennie Joppru ® 73
Jabari Holloway (2) 51

LT

Tony Boselli (8) 88
Jimmy Herndon (7) 61

LG

Chester Pitts (1) 72
Ryan Schau (5) 63

C

Steve McKinney (5) 83
Todd Washington (5) 68

RG

Zach Wiegert (8) 77
Fred Weary (1) 66

RT

Greg Randall (3) 78
RT#74 ® 56

LE

Gary Walker (8) 87
Corey Sears (4) 57

RE

Jerry DeLoach (3) 66
Shawn Worthen (2) 57

DT

Steve Martin (7) 81
Chester McGlockton (11) 78
Seth Payne (6) 77

LOLB

Kailee Wong (5) 74
Darren Hambrick (5) 70

MLB

Jamie Sharper (6) 91
Randall Godfrey (7) 88
Jay Foreman (4) 78
Dominique Stevenson (1) 57

ROLB

Charlie Clemons (6) 81
Corey Moore (3) 59

CB

Aaron Glenn (9) 94
Marcus Coleman (7) 86
Deion Sanders (12) 78
Juran Bolden (7) 76
Terry Fair (5) 74

FS

Ronnie Bradford (10) 79
Patrick Dennis (3) 60

SS

Eric Brown (5) 71
Ramon Walker (1) 65

K

Kris Brown (4) 77

P

Tom Rouen (9) 79

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

A word or two about what kind of offense and defense we're going to run.

On offense, we're going to be high-octane and wide open.

On defense, we're going to attack and go for sacks and turnovers.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

The 2003 season has been simmed and to the residents of HOUSTON it must have seemed as if the "LUV YA BLUE" days of the HOUSTON OILERS and the run-and-shoot were back as CARR filled the air with footballs in a wide open spread attack with the dome rocking in appreciation.

The TEXANS went 12-4 with CARR passing for 4593 yards, 32 TDs and 19 INTs.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Other top performers:

STACEY MACK ran for 1163 yards and 11 TDs.

ANDRE JOHNSON had a fabulous rookie year with 118 catches for 1399 yards and 15 TDs.

COREY BRADFORD showcased his breakaway speed as the #2 WR with 113 catches for 1662 yards and 7 TDs.

BILLY MILLER had 104 receptions for 934 yards and 6 TDs, he's a superb receiving TE.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

TEXANS PRO BOWLERS:

CARR, JOHNSON, BRADFORD, MILLER, BOSELLI, WALKER, GLENN, BROWN.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

TEXANS YEAR 1 PLAYOFF STARTERS:

QB DAVID CARR (86) - Big-armed, agile and strong, progressing swiftly
HB STACEY MACK (80) - A grinder who can break tackles
FB LARRY CENTERS (88) - Last hurrah for elegant pass-receiving FB before retirement
WR1 ANDRE JOHNSON (85) - Big, strong and fast, franchise receiver
WR2 COREY BRADFORD (80) - Very swift and very sure-handed, a revelation
WR3 MICHAEL WESTBROOK (79) - Tall and physical
WR4 JABAR GAFFNEY (77) - Agile, with good hands, not a speedster
TE1 BILLY MILLER (81) - Former WR has great hands, not an all-round blocker though
TE2 BENNIE JOPPRU (73) - Solid youngster with potential
LT GREG RANDALL (78) - Strong enough and a good blocker
LG CHESTER PITTS (72) - Doesn't have great strength but technically adept
C STEVE McKINNEY (83) - Old vet is crafty enough to anchor the line
RG ZACH WIEGERT (77) - Good but not great strength
RT TONY BOSELLI (88) - Still a franchise tackle with outstanding strength but injury prone

LE GARY WALKER (87) - Excellent strength, a real stud DE
RE SETH PAYNE (77) - DT moonlights at end to stop the run
DT STEVE MARTIN (81) - Strong and balanced
DT CHESTER McGLOCKTON (78) - Not the fastest but packs a punch
LOLB JAMIE SHARPER (91) - Skilled and aware but not that fast
MLB RANDALL GODFREY (88) - Not that fast either but smart
ROLB CHARLIE CLEMONS (81) - Lacks top speed but a solid player
CB1 AARON GLENN (94) - Shutdown CB in his prime
CB2 MARCUS COLEMAN (86) - Lacks great speed but wily
CB3 DEION SANDERS (78) - Not what he was but still swift and cunning
CB4 TERRY FAIR (74) - Excellent speed, still a bit raw
FS RONNIE BRADFORD (79) - Veteran brings leadership and good speed
SS ERIC BROWN (71) - Not the fastest, but a banger

K KRIS BROWN (77) - Lacks the big leg
P TOM ROUEN (79) - Has some veteran smarts

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

As a division winner, HOUSTON will be hosting a playoff game at Reliant Stadium!

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

TOM BRADY and the 10-6 NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS will be coming to town in the TEXANS' first-ever playoff game - it couldn't get much tougher!

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

10-6 PATRIOTS at 12-4 TEXANS

TEXANS win 31-24

0-3 Vinatieri 30 yard FG
7-3 Mack 3 yard TD run
14-3 Glenn 42 yard INT return
14-10 Patten 1 yard TD reception
21-10 Gaffney 12 yard TD reception
21-17 Smith 52 yard INT return
24-17 Brown 33 yard FG
24-24 Smith 1 yard TD run
31-24 Bradford 23 yard TD reception

A magnificent display on both offense and defense saw HOUSTON out-gain NEW ENGLAND 344 yards to 237 en route to a 31-24 victory and a place in the AFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME.

AARON GLENN was MVP of the contest for his INT of BRADY that he returned for a TD, giving HOUSTON a 14-3 lead early in the game. But GARY WALKER put on an incredible display too, notching 5 tackles and 2 sacks of the hapless BRADY.

On offense DAVID CARR was steady, completing 20 of 28 for 316 yards, 2 TDs and an INT. His favourite WR was COREY BRADFORD, with 5 catches for 105 yards and the winning score.

That put HOUSTON up 31-24 and the TEXANS went on to ice it when, needing to run out the clock, they lined up and hammered the ball down NEW ENGLAND's throats, with STACEY MACK twice running behind TONY BOSELLI for crucial first downs.

After all his injury problems, that must have felt very, very sweet for BOSELLI. MACK ran 13 times for 41 yards and a TD in total. JOHNSON had a good game, with 4 catches for 73 yards, while GAFFNEY added 3 grabs for 44 yards and a TD.

TOM BRADY completed 20 of 29 balls for 192 yards, a TD and that INT. His leading receiver was TE CHRISTIAN FAURIA with 5 catches for 69 yards. ANTOWAIN SMITH ran 11 times for 51 yards and a TD.

The PATRIOTS were at least competitive on D, with OTIS SMITH returning a CARR INT for a score and ROMAN PHIFER notching 7 tackles, two sacks and a forced fumble. HOUSTON's leading tackler was RONNIE BRADFORD, with 7.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS



And so, rather remarkably, the HOUSTON TEXANS now await the AFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME and an opportunity to turn their first ever trip to the playoffs into a SUPER BOWL appearance.

Even more remarkably, the venue of the SUPER BOWL this year is RELIANT STADIUM in Houston, giving the TEXANS the tantalising opportunity to be the first home team to ever win the Lombardi Trophy.

Already in the SUPER BOWL are the 12-4 TAMPA BAY BUCS, the defending SUPER BOWL champions, with a mighty array of weapons on offense and defense.

Contesting the AFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME will be the defending AFC CHAMPION 12-4 OAKLAND RAIDERS. This is the final opportunity for RICH GANNON, JERRY RICE, and TIM BROWN to get a SUPER BOWL ring before they retire.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

12-4 RAIDERS at 12-4 TEXANS

TEXANS win 24-17

3-0 Brown 39 yard FG
3-7 Garner 20 yard TD run
3-10 Janikowski 23 yard FG
10-10 Westbrook 30 yard TD reception
17-10 Mack 1 yard TD run
17-17 Buchanon 92 yard INT return
24-17 Mack 4 yard TD run

HOUSTON's fairy tale post-season continued with an unlikely and stunning victory over the defending AFC CHAMPIONS.

Early on, the TEXANS withstood OAKLAND's initial surge and were fortunate to be only down 3-10. But then a CARR to WESTBROOK TD tied it up at 10, and with momentum swinging, reserve S RAMON WALKER forced a fumble on the subsequent kickoff and recovered it.

STACEY MACK punched it in to give HOUSTON a 17-10 lead at halftime. In the second half CARR's youth betrayed him and his INT was returned 92 yards for the score by PHILLIP BUCHANON of the RAIDERS.

But in the fourth, and with the final gun approaching, HOUSTON steadied and drove relentlessly down the field for MACK to punch it in again for a 24-17 lead.

With the RAIDERS frantically seeking to avoid the upset, GANNON drove them down the field but RANDALL GODFREY picked him off to regain possession. The TEXANS were then able to run out the remaining clock with some agricultural MACK runs to record the victory.

CARR finished the day 22 of 38 for 268 yards, a TD and that INT. MACK ran 11 times for 49 yards and 2 TDs and won the MVP award. COREY BRADFORD was CARR's main target with 7 catches for 113 yards. WESTBROOK had a big game too with 6 catches for 81 yards and the TD.

On the OAKLAND side, GANNON had an extremely disappointing day, finishing 10 of 20 for 93 yards and that INT. CHARLIE GARNER was the main source of offense for the RAIDERS, rushing 19 times for 93 yards and the TD. JERRY RICE had only 3 catches for 35 yards in his final game.

ERIC BROWN was the leading tackler for a sterling TEXANS D, with 7. GODFREY had 4 tackles and the crucial INT that put the TEXANS in their first ever SUPER BOWL.

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Ahead of our hometown SUPER BOWL, a look at the TEXANS YEAR 1 PLAYOFF STARTERS:

QB DAVID CARR (86) - Big-armed, agile and strong, progressing swiftly
HB STACEY MACK (80) - A grinder who can break tackles
FB LARRY CENTERS (88) - Last hurrah for elegant pass-receiving FB before retirement
WR1 ANDRE JOHNSON (85) - Big, strong and fast, franchise receiver
WR2 COREY BRADFORD (80) - Very swift and very sure-handed, a revelation
WR3 MICHAEL WESTBROOK (79) - Tall and physical
WR4 JABAR GAFFNEY (77) - Agile, with good hands, not a speedster
TE1 BILLY MILLER (81) - Former WR has great hands, not an all-round blocker though
TE2 BENNIE JOPPRU (73) - Solid youngster with potential
LT GREG RANDALL (78) - Strong enough and a good blocker
LG CHESTER PITTS (72) - Doesn't have great strength but technically adept
C STEVE McKINNEY (83) - Old vet is crafty enough to anchor the line
RG ZACH WIEGERT (77) - Good but not great strength
RT TONY BOSELLI (88) - Still a franchise tackle with outstanding strength but injury prone

LE GARY WALKER (87) - Excellent strength, a real stud DE
RE SETH PAYNE (77) - DT moonlights at end to stop the run
DT STEVE MARTIN (81) - Strong and balanced
DT CHESTER McGLOCKTON (78) - Not the fastest but packs a punch
LOLB JAMIE SHARPER (91) - Skilled and aware but not that fast
MLB RANDALL GODFREY (88) - Not that fast either but smart
ROLB CHARLIE CLEMONS (81) - Lacks top speed but a solid player
CB1 AARON GLENN (94) - Shutdown CB in his prime
CB2 MARCUS COLEMAN (86) - Lacks great speed but wily
CB3 DEION SANDERS (78) - Not what he was but still swift and cunning
CB4 TERRY FAIR (74) - Excellent speed, still a bit raw
FS RONNIE BRADFORD (79) - Veteran brings leadership and good speed
SS ERIC BROWN (71) - Not the fastest, but a banger

K KRIS BROWN (77) - Lacks the big leg
P TOM ROUEN (79) - Has some veteran smarts

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

Coming up! It's the 12-4 HOUSTON TEXANS vs the defending SUPER BOWL champion 12-4 TAMPA BAY BUCS in SUPER BOWL XXVIII at Reliant Stadium, Houston, Texas!

[Torcida]

A new history of the HOUSTON TEXANS

SB: 12-4 BUCS vs 12-4 TEXANS

BUCS win 40-16

0-7 McCardell 21 yard TD reception
0-10 Gramatica 52 yard FG
3-10 Brown 24 yard FG
6-10 Brown 24 yard FG
6-17 Johnson 2 yard TD run
6-20 Gramatica 51 yard FG
9-20 Brown 39 yard FG
9-27 Jurevicius 34 yard TD reception
9-34 Pittman 3 yard TD run
9-37 Gramatica 51 yard FG
9-40 Gramatica 25 yard FG
16-40 Bradford 5 yard TD reception

HOUSTON's dreams were cruelly crushed by a masterful TAMPA BAY team that cruised to their second straight SUPER BOWL triumph.

The final score probably was a little unfair, but HOUSTON can have little complaints about the outcome. Throughout much of the contest the TEXANS struggled to get into the end-zone and were forced to settle for FGs. Meanwhile, TAMPA BAY was getting into the end-zone and even when they weren't, their K MARTIN GRAMATICA was knocking over FGs from mighty distances - 52, 51 and 51 yards.

There was a point midway through the game when it was 20-9 and still an open contest but with HOUSTON forced to chase their game TAMPA took advantage of some late turnovers to put up a string of scores.

BRAD JOHNSON was MVP of the contest - he enjoyed a brilliant game, completing 17 of 23 for 299 yards and 2 TDs, and also went in from two yards out on a sneak. KEENAN McCARDELL was his favourite WR with 5 grabs for 87 yards and the TD. MICHAEL PITTMAN had 16 rushes for 39 yards and a TD.

CARR meanwhile completed 21 of 37 for 286 yards, a TD and 3 INTs. They were snared by JOHN LYNCH, JOHN HOWELL and RONDE BARBER. He was also bullied by TAMPA's D-line with GREG SPIRES recording two sacks and SIMEON RICE one.

No TEXANS receiver really shone. ANDRE JOHNSON had 4 grabs for 57 yards, LARRY CENTERS 3 catches for 57 yards too, and MICHAEL WESTBROOK had 2 receptions for 57 yards. STACEY MACK ran 7 times for 35 yards.

GARY WALKER did get a sack of JOHNSON, and MARCUS COLEMAN was HOUSTON's leading tackler with 6.