Surely you can't be serious...

[Spearmint Rhino]

I am, and don't call me Shirley.

R.I.P. the truly great Leslie Nielsen. A compilation of his best moments here just had me laughing till I nearly choked.

A Republican in real life, alas, but I think we can forgive that for all the good times.

[Calvert]

Surely you can't be serious...

'You're wanted in the funeral parlour'
'The funeral parlour? What is it?'
'It's a place where they put dead people'.

R.I.P indeed.
The first time I saw the Priscilla Presley 'Hey, nice beaver' skit, I howled with laughter and rewound and watched it over and over to make sure he'd actually said it.

He seemed like a genuine mentalist too if his appearance on Wogan was anything to go by.

[G-Man]

Surely you can't be serious...

One of my favourite blink-or-you'll-miss-it pieces of dialogue in the Police Squad series:

"Cigarette?"
"I know."

[Sean of the Shed]

Surely you can't be serious...

Leslie Nielsen was brilliant. I remember pissing myself laughing at Police Squad!, the running gags were fantastic, such as the small guy under the desk instead of the intercomm, the elevator stops, Johnny the shoeshine boy and the freezeframe at the end. The Naked Gun films were of equal standard, though by the 33¹/₃ one the gags were starting to dry up a bit. It was a pity that he then seemed to get railroaded into the appalling Scary Movie type series (where he was mostly the only funny turn in the film), when surely there was someone who could have written something more befitting a comedy genius.
RIP.
Meanwhile here's one of my favourite scenes from Police Squad!
Frank Drebin: "All right Eddie, let's go over it one more time. Where were you last night?"
Eddie Casales: "I told you a dozen times, I was at the movies"
Norberg: [after coming in] "I got the sandwiches here"
Ed Hocken: "All right Eddie, you went to the movies. Now what did you see?"
Edddie Casales: "I told you, I don't remember"
Norberg: "Who had the egg salad?"
Ed Hocken: [mimicking Eddie] "I don't remember"
Norberg: "Somebody ordered it"
Frank Drebin: "You don't expect us to buy that"
Norberg: "But I already paid for it"
Eddie Casales: "Why don't you give a guy a break"
Norberg: "Thanks a lot"
Eddie Casales : "What's the charge?"
Norberg: "$4.58"
Ed Hocken: "What are you trying to do, insult us?"
Norberg: "Okay, $3.50. Coffee's on me"
Eddie Casales: "I told you, I went to the movies, I fell asleep, I don't remember."
Frank Drebin: "You don't expect us to swallow that"
Norberg: "All right, I'll eat it! But I don't think it's fair that I should have to pay for it." (walks away)
Ed Hocken: "All right Eddie, let's say you did go to the movies"
ALL: "You did go to the movies"
Frank Drebin: "Then let's say you were nowhere near the Club Flamingo"
Eddie Casales: "All right"
ALL: "you were nowhere near the club flamingo"
Frank Drebin: "Then, explain this to me" (shows him the matchbox)
Eddie Casales: "Well, you take this little cardboard stick out with sulphur on the end, and you rub it on the edges, and it makes fire."

[Crusoe]

Surely you can't be serious...

"Who are you, and how did you get in here?"

"I'm a locksmith... and... I'm a locksmith"

[Commodore]

Surely you can't be serious...

Airplane was a funny film until Nielsen's first scene; at that point it became one of the funniest LOL films ever that holds its own with Life of Brian and Blazing Saddles. I have never seen anyone deliver such comic timing whilst being able to keep a straight face. That's what killed me.

The Naked Gun films, as good as they were, did not hold a candle to Police Squad, which makes me howl as soon as the opening credits announce 'Police Squad! In Color' That 'In Color' bit for a series first broadcast in 1982 creased me up as 10 year old and still does now.

Having got the DVD with an interview with Neilson he stated that the reason that PS got cancelled was that American audiences did not get the humour because they did not not have the sufficient attention span to absorb every quip and visual gag. It was only when ITV broadcast it in the UK that there was a demand for new material only to be told that 6 episodes was all we were going to get.

As a result, Police Squad quit whilst it was way ahead and the jokes, gags and Nielsen's deadpan performance still make me laugh so hard I forget that there are others trying to watch it with me. Leslie Nielsen was the lynchpin of this absurdity and for that I shall be eternally grateful.

Favourite line of the top of my head was when Drebin was working undercover as a boxing promoter with one piece of advice for his jazz-loving client;

'Johnny. No sax before a fight.'

May he Rest in Peace, God dammit.

[evilC]

Surely you can't be serious...

Frank: A good cop - needlessly cut down by some cowardly hoodlums.
Ed: That's no way for a man to die.
Frank: No... you're right, Ed. A parachute not opening... that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go!
Wilma Nordberg: [cries] Oh... Frank. This is terrible!
Ed: Don't you worry, Wilma. Your husband is going to be alright. Don't you worry about anything. Just think positive. Never let a doubt enter your mind.
Frank: He's right, Wilma. But I wouldn't wait until the last minute to fill out those organ donor cards.
[Wilma cries again]
Ed: What I'm trying to say is that, Wilma, as soon as Nordberg is better, he's welcome back at Police Squad.
Frank: ...Unless he's a drooling vegetable. But I think that's only common sense.
[Wilma cries again]

[Calvert]

Surely you can't be serious...

Escape from Alcaraz wrote:

Having got the DVD with an interview with Neilson he stated that the reason that PS got cancelled was that American audiences did not get the humour because they did not not have the sufficient attention span to absorb every quip and visual gag.

And yet there are ten full series of Friends.

It's a sad and sorry world.

The scene where Drebbin forces open a locked drawer and says 'bingo!' then lifts a bingo card out of the drawer is unreasonably funny too and I've no idea why.

[evilC]

Surely you can't be serious...

And let's not forget one of sci-fi's iconic fims too:

-

[Mr Beast]

Surely you can't be serious...

RIP Les.

Frank: The red light district. I wonder why Sauvage is hanging round there.

Ed: Sex, Frank?

Frank: Uh.. no, Ed... not right now...

[Tubby Isaacs]

Surely you can't be serious...

Some of those unusual moments from baseball over the years...

[Tubby Isaacs]

Surely you can't be serious...

Oh man.

"Can you tell us where the powder came from?"
"Sure. Millions of years ago, the earth was a molten mass.."

I don't think we should have Phil Donohue on again.

[Toby Gymshorts]

Surely you can't be serious...

This still makes me giggle.

[erwin]

Surely you can't be serious...

"Bingo!"

(He was great, but a lot was in the writing, wasn't it?)