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[HORN]

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I'm so sorry to hear that, mate. It only seems like yesterday you lost your mum. The picture you paint of your dad he seemed quite a fighter. I loved his Lotus reward scheme too.

Take care.

[Brandenburger Toro]

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Shit, man, that's very hard news. Take care.

[ChrisJ]

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Little to say other than sincere condolences GO.
Best of luck to your dad, linus.

[Tubby Isaacs]

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Best wishes, Tim.

[Uncle Ethan]

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Another Australian stranger wishing you well. Savour every moment left - take him for a few spins in the beast. Same thoughts for Linus.

[Nocturnal Submission]

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My sincere condolences, Tim.

[David Agnew]

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Condolences, Tim.

[Gangster Octopus]

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Thank you for all your kind comments and thoughts. It really helps.

Since I started the thread, father had had at least two remissions, and just three weeks before he died, he drove his Lotus up to Chatsworth to go to the farm shop and try and get some sweetbreads. He failed, but I took him some up the following week, which I'd managed to get in that really good butchers in Pinner.

So that was only two weeks before he died. A couple of days after that, he started to get a lot more pain, and, much to his annoyance, had to repair to bed. He was slightly cheered up to find out that he'd been got a urinary infection, but it knocked him out. By this time, he was down to 6 stone. The Saturday before he died, my sisters, my youngest brother and myself played Pass The Pigs and Solo on his bed, whilst carefully being clumsy enough to lean on him...

His knowledge as a General Practitioner and his will-power wouldn't allow him to take anything stronger than pain-killers. He knew that once he was on morphine, that would be it. Sadly the pain became just too much to bear, and on Friday he went onto the morphine. After that, he was pretty much comatose, but he could sort of communicate with his eye-brows.

I travelled up with the London Millers, on a pre-arranged trip, on Saturday and after the match went across to Rotherham to join the family. He was incapable of speech, but as I said he appeared to be able to communicate with his eye-brows. He reminded me of his father the night that he died, however I wasn't expecting everything to happen so rapidly. I sat with him for about half-an-hour, just babbling bollocks at him.

He was also incapable of hydrating himself, so anyone sat with him would dip their fingers into a glass of water and rub it round his mouth. As I was talking to him, I had tears coming down my cheeks, so, for some reason I decided that it would be a nice idea to rub my tears round his lips. I did this and then came to my senses, the last thing a heavily de-hydrated person needs is salt...

There'd been a couple of palliative nurses round, so I went downstairs and had a cup of tea and a chat with them, and showed them photographs of my parents from years back. They enjoyed it, as all they get to see is dead folk. Then I went back up to see my father.

Shortly after, my little brother turned up, so I decided to let him take over, whilst I went off to have a quick pint and meet my niece. I said goodbye and left.

Half-an-hour later I was back and logging onto WSC to sort of say what was happening. As I've said earlier, as I was starting, my little brother came down in tears and said "he's gone". And that was it. Apparently my father's breathing had gradually slowed down and then stopped. My little brother, who was with him, tried to revive him, but it wasn't going to happen.

I'd love to think that my father waited until all of his children had said goodbye...

[diggedy derek]

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Thanks for that incredibly eloquent post Tim.

Really sorry for your loss.

My gran died just after she'd seen all the family over christmas and new year; perhaps people do, somehow, hang on until they've seen everyone they need to, and quietly slip away after that.

[Amor de Cosmos]

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I think something like that goes on. Certainly my Dad died very shortly after he was sure my Mum was being looked after properly — though he refused to see her in the nursing home. Three weeks later he was gone. It was if his mind said to his body "OK we've done what we can, let's get out of here."

And Tim, Your last post is beautiful. Many thanks.

[E10 Rifle]

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perhaps people do, somehow, hang on until they've seen everyone they need to, and quietly slip away after that.

Yeah, there could be something in that. My paternal grandfather hung on until the exact sixth anniversary of his wife's passing and then keeled over at my mum and dad's, with all the family around him. Except me, as it goes. I'd had my own last meeting with him a couple of weeks ago, on the way back from the 1997 Ashes Test at Trent Bridge, so my final lengthy conversation with the man who instilled a lasting love of cricket in me was about Shane Warne.

That was a great post anyway, Tim. I'm sure your old man would have been proud.

[WOM]

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My thoughts are with you, GO.

[Third rate Leszno]

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I'd echo those posts about people hanging on until they've seen or heard from everyone close to them - happened to me with my Gran a few years ago.

Lovely, well-written post by the way GO - and my sincere condolences on your loss.

[hobbes]

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I've only just seen this. My condolences, mate. That's very sad news.

[Guest]

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Yes, my best friend's dad (a surrogate dad to me, too, I loved him very much) passed away a week after she came back from years in Australia. I'm so glad he was able to see her before he died. I'm really sad he never met his grandson, though.

[Gangster Octopus]

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And father's sister died in a hospital in Ottawa last night. It's just one of those weeks...

[Guest]

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Oh no. really sorry to hear this. I hope you're coping OK.

[Edie St Pierre]

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Take care, Tim.

[RobM]

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Sorry to hear that I know that these will be tough times for you, been through something very similar myself in the last year or so, take care.

[Gangster Octopus]

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The funeral seems to have been a success. We gave him a coffin with photos of his Lotus; a send off to the sound of a BRM V16 and we got the hearse drivers to speed up Guilthwaite Hill at over a hundred. I'd like to believe that he'd've appreciated it...

[Bill Poster]

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I've only just seen your posts GO and I'd like to add my condolences. I'd also like to say what a wonderful and moving post you made about his passing. You could really feel the love you felt for him. Very moving.

[HORN]

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Yeah, amen to that. Very very very moving.

[Hofzinser]

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Belated condolences and best wishes from me too, GO.

[anton pulisov]

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GO, all the best from me in what must be a difficult time for you.

Just to let you know, the thought of a hearse doing 100 mph in somebody's honour made me smile. What a great idea.

[Gangster Octopus]

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Isn't Christmas odd without a parent about. Thank the gods that I've lots of brothers and sisters...