Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

"Celery" expectations

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    "Celery" expectations

    Celery raw
    Develops the jaw.
    Celery stewed
    Is more quietly chewed.

    I hate celery. It tastes of the fine sprinkling of morning dew across a summer lawn. And I don't dig on that taste.

    In fact, I don't like veg at all. Apart from onion, sweet corn, peppers and potatoes. And most of those probably don't count as veg.

    #2
    "Celery" expectations

    Celery sucks ass.

    Peppers contain their own seeds, so that's a fruit.
    Potatoes are a tubor.
    I think you're clear with onions and corn.

    Celery soup, however, is quite nice. Rare, though.

    Comment


      #3
      "Celery" expectations

      Celery root is actually pretty excellent as far as root vegetables go (and, at least in my imagination, the reason for the tastiness of celery soup).

      I make no claims about the excellence of this, however:

      Comment


        #4
        "Celery" expectations

        Whoa, those Brooklynites are nuts.

        There are only two proper uses for celery: inside a bloody mary, and in a mirepoix, sauteed in butter with onions and carrots.

        Comment


          #5
          "Celery" expectations

          Linus,

          Not a fan of ants on a log, then?

          Comment


            #6
            "Celery" expectations

            That's some fookin weird shit, Gyuri! Is this a regional thing, because I had never heard of it before.

            http://images.google.ca/images?sourc...=1&sa=N&tab=wi

            Comment


              #7
              "Celery" expectations

              It may be regional. It certainly something that was served in middle-class suburbs of Philadelphia, though it wasn't something I ever ate growing up (we left the raisins off. . .not sure that makes it better). It was often served at the house of some of may friends. Basically, the same families that ate scrapple (depicted below):


              Apologies that the best picture I could find seems to have syrup on it. I don't want to restart the syrup on meat wars.

              Comment


                #8
                "Celery" expectations

                Celery is ok, finely chopped, fried in walnut oil and added to a particularly gooey curry or chilli to add some bite. (Although raw onions usually suffice as most people would rather see onion than celery without going "What the fuck did you put celery in the curry/chilli for?")

                Otherwise, give it to your rabbit to crunch and watch as the poor rabbit gets a flossing it doesnt particularly want.

                *edit of course celery salt is compulsory for a good 'Bloody Mary' although I couldnt tell you why. I can tell you when its missing, no matter how much Tabasco is in there.

                Comment


                  #9
                  "Celery" expectations

                  Isn't celery the only food which eating it burns more calories than the food actually has?

                  And can someone make that sentence read a bit more clearly?

                  Comment


                    #10
                    "Celery" expectations

                    yes and

                    Isnt celery, unique, in that the calories burned through mastication, are in inverse proportion to its intake?

                    No.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      "Celery" expectations

                      .

                      A mate of mine from the 80s who was a Chelsea fan told me that they used to take sticks of celery to games and throw them, accompanied by the chant:

                      *Celery, celery
                      Oh we're all pissed up and we're throwing celery

                      (or something like that)

                      (*to the tune of 'Wemberly, Wemberly')

                      .

                      Comment


                        #12
                        "Celery" expectations

                        I knew a Chelsea fan at Uni who told me that they sung "Celery, celery, if she don't cum I'll tickle 'er bum with a bunch of celery...".

                        Comment


                          #13
                          "Celery" expectations

                          Oh, and to anyone who dislikes celery because of the stringiness - take a potato peeler to it and whip the stringy bits off.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            "Celery" expectations

                            .

                            I think that was it, thom - my refined self having pushed that version to the back of the brain.

                            .

                            Comment


                              #15
                              "Celery" expectations

                              Celery at Chelsea was mainly a late 80s to mid 90s thing (Now I think about it, it was the Chelsea inflatable which dates it quite well). I remember going to West Brom and there was a massive waist high pile of it just through the turnstyles cos it had been decided it was an offensive weapon. Song is still sung occasionally.

                              Comment


                                #16
                                "Celery" expectations

                                I've not eaten celery raw in nearly 20 years. I used to eat plenty of that stringy shit, but one day after hitting it particularly hard, I was sick during the night.

                                I now realise that celery was not the cause of this, but the brain is a funny organ, and the link between raw celery and chunder is now well established in my mind.

                                It's an important ingredient in cooking, though. Especially if, like me, you're a massive ponce.

                                Comment


                                  #17
                                  "Celery" expectations

                                  I'm not a big fan, it has a really dinstinctive taste that I find unpalatable.

                                  Comment


                                    #18
                                    "Celery" expectations

                                    Understandable, Jason.

                                    I find Tottering Hotshots' tastlessness equally unpalatable.

                                    I normally chop coarsely as a sandwich filling with cheese, humus, fish etc.

                                    Comment


                                      #19
                                      "Celery" expectations

                                      dotmund wrote:
                                      [quote]I now realise that celery was not the cause of this, but the brain is a funny organ, and the link between raw celery and chunder is now well established in my mind.
                                      quote]

                                      I have the same with sweetcorn.

                                      I got massively ill on the 3rd September 1985, after trying Tennents Extra in the Bayham Tavern in Pratt Street, went home and ate corn on the cob... pebble dash is not the phrase.

                                      (I remember the date as it was 7 days after I arrived in London, and the end of my first week as a betting shop manager)

                                      Comment

                                      Working...
                                      X