I don't understand my wife...

[Sam]

I don't understand my wife...

Well my ex (who's the only proper girlfriend I've had) is Argentine. And it's only since she made up her mind to leave me that I've really had any decent grasp of Spanish.

I mean, she speaks excellent English, but still.

[Gerontophile]

I don't understand my wife...

!

(sorry Sam)

[axel]

I don't understand my wife...

To my eternal shame i've been with my wife for nearly five years and i'm still not fluent in Japanese. Picked up the odd saying and can understand topics of conversation but I don't feel it's good enough. It doesn't help that she's great at English and i'm a lazy bastard.

[hobbes]

I don't understand my wife...

P is from Hull and TLV grew up with northern parents and lived for years in the North but both of them sound totally southern apart from flat vowels.
Which is weird, because they both have sisters and both sisters sound REALLY northern.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

I don't understand my wife...

I live in the north, it's amazing. I often have to have to ask people to write things down so I can understand what they've said.

Mind you, asking people to write things down up here is pretty futile, as well.

But it's not as bad as Wales.

And you can pretty much write Scotland off as a comprehensible "English" language speaking nation.

[Guest]

I don't understand my wife...

It sounds brilliant, this. What's that? Oh did you ask me to do that? I can't have understood. No, I would never say something like that! That word means 'I love you my little pumpkin' where I'm from. Is it really that bad where you're from? Oh dear. The fun we have!

[Guest]

I don't understand my wife...

One of the advantages of being deaf, I've found, is that you can tell people to say it again slowly and clearly without causing offence. I find this especially useful when dealing with my customers in Norn Iron (although actually I've got used to them now).

The other advantage, in case you were wondering, is the off position on the old hearing aid. Marvellous.

[Guest]

I don't understand my wife...

Some kids on the tram were playing loud tinny music through their phones (hello TonTon!) and the old bloke opposite me tiik his hearing aid out. I envied him a little bit.

[Crusoe]

I don't understand my wife...

I clicked the link.

My wife's a geordie but her accent has faded so much she feels embarrassed when people hear her when she goes back home. Gives me a little ammo to fire back with against her piss-taking of my tediously generic southern non-accent.

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

I don't understand my wife...

Mumpo wrote:

I went out with a girl at college who had an impenetrable Cumbrian burr. It was really off-putting.

Not off-putting enough to stop you from going out with her, it seems.