Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

[Spearmint Rhino]

Last week, I saw a tabloid piece about Orville-faced television "hottie" Holly Willoughby, accompanied by a photo in which she showed off her legs. The piss-poor caption was:

Holly Wil-leg-by

Which doesn't even fucking work.

Yesterday, I saw a tabloid football supplement about England's uninspiring 2-0 victory over Andorra. The headline on the front was:

Bland Of Hope And Snory

Which is equally lame.

So, off you go. Let's have the lamest, weakest, can't-be-bothered, mind's-gone-blank, it's-half-past-five-can-I-go-to-the-pub-now-please? efforts at headline-writing or caption-writing you've seen.

[EIM]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

When I was at More, I had to do a bit about Chinese food, for Chinese New Year. The boss said that I had to have a pun headline, but it couldn't be 'wok this way'.

We sat for about an hour going through every possibility, until about half past five, when we had to go to a leaving party at the pub. It got filed under the headline 'wok this way'.

[EIM]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Though at Zoo, my pun for the most one footed player in the Premiership was cruelly ignored. I suggested Danny Mills-McCartney, but they didn't use it. Fuckers.

[Guest]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

I always thought Phew wot a scorcher! which gets an airing whenever the sun deigns to shine over here is particually lazy.

Usually accompanied by a picture of a girl in a bikini down in Brighton and if its a really slow news day a picture of a couple of coppers eating ice-creams.

[Ginger Yellow]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Pretty much any headline about Rooney.

[WOM]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Chinese food, for Chinese New Year

Gung ho, fat boy.

[treibeis]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

When Peter Beadle was playing in Bristol, the Evening Post regularly informed its readers that said gentleman was somewhere in the vicinity.

[Taylor]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Ginger Yellow wrote:

Pretty much any headline about Rooney.

How could Roo say that?

[chrisS]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

i'm always irked by any headline in which the words 'best' and 'breast' have been swapped. Why? They don't really rhyme. They don't mean anything like the same thing. One is just the other with two letters removed. Fucking arbitrary.

[E10 Rifle]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

I'm impresssed by the durability of "Kop" as both a pun component and as a headline in anything of even the vaguest connection to Liverpool FC. Almost deserved a "United"-style ding in the days when Kops proliferated at grounds across the country.

[N est à?]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

A Fair Kop.

[N est à?]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Whenever Arsenal win anything and seem to be on an upward curve (so not recently), theres always a load of WE'RE GUNNER BE THE BEST EVER headlines. I mean, I wouldn't mind, but you'd expect better of the Observer.

[Wyatt Earp]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

centrifugal wrote:

i'm always irked by any headline in which the words 'best' and 'breast' have been swapped. Why? They don't really rhyme. They don't mean anything like the same thing. One is just the other with two letters removed. Fucking arbitrary.

They do rhyme. What's your accent?

[Stumpy Pepys]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

As GY has alluded to, rhymes with 'you' are really tiresome. The template for this is 'You Must Be Joking':

Schu Must Be Joking (Michael Schumacher)
Roo Must Be Joking (Wayne Rooney)
EU Must Be Joking (European Union or formerly Chris Eubank)
Sou Must Be Joking (Graeme Souness)

[chrisS]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Alright.... I suppose they do sort of..damn..ok, sorry,they do rhyme. They're still entirely unsuitable words to swap randomly though.
Someone in work buys the Daily Star, and it's a haven for these kind of dreadful headlines. As per, it covered the MTV awards last night. I didn't read the 'story', but according to the cover, Britney Spears was "breast in show", or some such. She must have won something. Possibly for her tits.

[Er Liquidatore]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Holly Willoughby is fucking hot SR, you madman

[Spearmint Rhino]

Holly Wil-leg-by, Bland Of Hope And Snory

Look, I'm not saying I wouldn't, but she does look like Orville The Duck.