OK. So which one of us got a job as a Maître d?

[Guy Profumo]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/11444602/Woman-orders-cheese-and-biscuits-at-hotel-and-gets-this-instead.html

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

OK. So which one of us got a job as a Maître d?

That reminds me of the time I ordered an Irish coffee in a restaurant in Florence. After several attempts at explaining it was coffee with whiskey in it to the perplexed waiter, he came back with a cup of whiskey which they had put through their coffee machine. And charged us about €20 for it. Actually, it was quite nice ...

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

OK. So which one of us got a job as a Maître d?

Rogin the Armchair Fan wrote: That reminds me of the time I ordered an Irish coffee in a restaurant in Florence. After several attempts at explaining it was coffee with whiskey in it to the perplexed waiter, he came back with a cup of whiskey which they had put through their coffee machine. And charged us about €20 for it. Actually, it was quite nice ...

Did you enjoy your beans on toast?

[treibeis]

OK. So which one of us got a job as a Maître d?

At a village fair very near to where G-Man comes from, I once ordered a whisky, only to be given a whisky & cola.

When I tackled the barman about it, he said, "If thee wants a whisky widdout cola, thee 'as to ass for a whisky widdout cola. Udderwise thee gets a whisky wid cola."

Unusually for somebody from that part of the world, he didn't follow it up with, "And if thee duddn't loike it, thee book-learnin'-word baastard, then fuck aff back 'a 'Amburg afore we ties thee to a duckin' stool and chucks curly cale at 'ee till thee 'ead's fell off and then kicks it frum 'ere t' Ratzeburg an' back", but only because he forgot to.