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    I'm doomed

    warning

    (Oi, Bored, did you get the shirt?)

    #2
    I'm doomed

    I bought the new Bang&Olufsen time travelling machine ($1.999)

    I went back to 1936 and killed Adolf Hitler, but some bastard went back to the French trenches of 1916 and warned him about it, so when I returned he had occupied Sweden as well.

    What would you do if you could time travel, and how do we keep Hitler a stiff!?

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      #3
      I'm doomed

      Oh, and if I travel back in time with a machine that wasn't invented back then, how the hell could I return?

      If we forget about that little bit, if the machine doesn't vanish when I appear back in, oh, 1955, or whatever, why hasn't anyone been smart enough to stay a bit in 1955, introduce the machine as his/her invention, and make a fortune?

      B&O, feast your eyes on the Runwank3000-TTM!

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        #4
        I'm doomed

        The only remotely physically plausible time-travel scenarios use wormholes, and would require "portal" technology at either end. So you can't leap back to a time before time travel was invented.

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          #5
          I'm doomed

          The only remotely physically plausible time-travel scenarios use wormholes
          or Wightlink ferries.

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            #6
            I'm doomed

            I went back to 1916 and killed Hitler. But then someone went back in time to 1981 and killed me. How am I posting this then, I hear you type. Well, the answer is I AM NOT. I am a time-travelling, cyborg recreation of me being sent back in time to kill the person who killed me. But he isn't back in time, he's in the future, so I've got to go there to kill him instead.

            I'm not sure how all this will pan out, but I'm pretty certain it'll be disastrous.

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              #7
              I'm doomed

              Also, welcome home, Runwank. Good to have you back.

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                #8
                I'm doomed

                1 Hour and 7 Minutes ago I went back and deleted your post, so why the feck's it back up here?

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                  #9
                  I'm doomed

                  The only remotely physically plausible time-travel scenarios use wormholes, and would require "portal" technology at either end. So you can't leap back to a time before time travel was invented.
                  What a crap time travel unless you can travel like Calvin takes Hobbes in a cradboard box machine, back to the dino's.

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                    #10
                    I'm doomed

                    EIM, you're OK, I just came back from 1981 where I killed the bastard who killed you, before he killed you.

                    Hitler's dead again!

                    Let's do Phol Pot now!

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                      #11
                      I'm doomed

                      Ah, ya beautiful bastard. Good to have you back.

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                        #12
                        I'm doomed

                        Sorry, mate, I have taken until now to track you down. Yes, I did get the shirt, it is beautiful (Marley is most envious), lucky already in that I scored two goals in it in the first match I played and I will be, of course, wearing it with pride in the summer as Croatia are my chosen team.

                        Sorry about that, they are doomed now

                        Cheers again and a thousandfold

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                          #13
                          I'm doomed

                          I sense a general reluctance to talk about masturbation.

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                            #14
                            I'm doomed

                            Another drawback of the new board.

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                              #15
                              I'm doomed

                              I've just travelled back a couple of months, had a wank, then ran naked onto the pitch at St. Andrews just before Taylor was about to tackle Eduardo.

                              I've just arrived back. So who's playing in the Champions' league semi final tomorrow?

                              No one is allowed to answer, because this is OTF world. We're supposed to talk about wanking here.

                              Edit. I may be prepared to write the word wank 2 (nay 3) times in my post, but I'm buggered if I'm going to miss an apostrophe out.

                              Comment


                                #16
                                I'm doomed

                                I bought the new Bang&Olufsen time travelling machine ($1.999)
                                That reminds me of "Neuromancer", the way the author would use existing brands to describe sci-fi gadgets...

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                                  #17
                                  I'm doomed

                                  I've just arrived back. So who's playing in the Champions' league semi final tomorrow?

                                  No one is allowed to answer, because this is OTF world. We're supposed to talk about wanking here.
                                  The wankers are playing tonight. And Rio Ferdinand and Thierry Henry are playing tomorrow.

                                  Comment

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