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    Do you like throwing a party?

    Now that we all might be allowed to again, soon.

    I don't, really. I never did. Having a couple of friends over for a dinner party I love the idea of, and enjoy playing host to start with, but I'm always eventually relieved when they finally make their excuses and leave, especially if guests have stayed overnight in our spare room after a drunken evening and we have that awkward "well we're all a bit disshevelled" breakfast. Bigger garden barbecues, similar, love having people round to eat drink and laugh for a bit, but I'll be the one by about 20 minutes after sundown going round with a bin bag tidying up the paper plates etc in a not so subtle hint that it's time to go.

    I'm not really antisocial, I just don't like my space disturbed. And even when I go to other people's house parties, I'm one of those always asking the hosts if there's anything I can do to help tidy up, assuming they'll be relieved to get people out too.

    How about you? Do you like nothing more than throwing your doors open to the neighbourhood of a Saturday night so it's like something out of a Will Smith pool party video?
    Last edited by Rogin the Armchair fan; 05-04-2021, 14:40.

    #2
    I'm absolutely with you on this one. I'm really not comfortable having other people in the house. Any social events we hold are almost always small affairs.

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      #3
      I very much prefer socialising out and about to hosting or visiting other people in their homes.

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        #4
        I'll never better my fortieth - for which I sensibly hired a venue - so I'm not even going to try.

        (Probably haven't held a proper house party since the 1990s.)

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          #5
          I'd much prefer 8 people over for dinner than 30 swinging from the chandeliers.


          Funny this came up, as yesterday we rode past a house where my friends and I rolled up for a house party in high school. As was our wont, as the evening wore down, we all started hustling around cleaning up bottles, ashtrays, food containers, washing dishes, etc. I have no idea why we did this, but we always did. The host was more than a little confused / pleased.


          Also, I read a thing last month about a guy who loves hosting dinners, but always says "You're invited to dinner from 7 - 10 pm", then when 10 o'clock rolls around, he genially says "Well this was lovely, and thank you all for coming" and people pick up and leave. And I'm like 'that's brilliant'. Because we've been 'stuck' with a hanger-on couple until the wee hours when we'd have happily been in bed at 10:30. That's pure agony.

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            #6
            Thought this would be about house parties but the OP is more in the Abigail's Party meaning of the word isn't it. I've never thrown a party unless half a dozen people crashing at mine with beers counts. I don't mind attending house parties at someone else's, but like Benjm I'd rather socialise at pubs or caffs these days. Dinner parties sound the worst

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              #7
              Originally posted by Jah Womble View Post
              I'll never better my fortieth - for which I sensibly hired a venue - so I'm not even going to try.
              Yeah, this. My 40th was a full-day drop in / drop out in the backyard in August. People would eat something, drink something and leave when they wanted. It was perfect.

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                #8
                Originally posted by Fussbudget View Post
                Thought this would be about house parties but the OP is more in the Abigail's Party meaning of the word isn't it. I've never thrown a party unless half a dozen people crashing at mine with beers counts. I don't mind attending house parties at someone else's, but like Benjm I'd rather socialise at pubs or caffs these days. Dinner parties sound the worst
                It can be both. I think hosting 'house parties' for me would be exactly my nightmare - as I said I'm bad enough when I've got everyone out in the garden round a barbecue.

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                  #9
                  Big parties feel like the weirdest thing to host, because my stamina means I can't stay partying for more than three or four hours tops - I just get socialised out and exhausted. So if you have 50 people over you can talk to then for at best about 5 minutes each. I quite like having a group of 6 or 8 or 10 for dinner. You get to cook something interesting, you perhaps get people from different areas of your life to have a conversation and that's always fun to have that chemistry. But you really want them to start thinking about leaving maybe half an hour after you've stopped eating... I don't mind strangers in my space, and I'm totally fine with cleaning up the chaos - but everyone has to be out early enough that I can clear and clean up that night. I absolutely despise coming down to post-party chaos the morning after.

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                    #10
                    Back in a shared house in my 20s we hosted some legendary parties. That's because you didn't have to make any effort, it was just, "Turn up Saturday, bring beer". Nowadays I haven't had a single person in my house in nearly two years (and that was an electrician that I didn't know was coming), and I'd much rather go to someone else's, because then I can leave when I feel like it.

                    I have never hosted or attended a dinner party.

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                      #11
                      It's nice to have a couple of friends over for dinner. I'd only have people I'm very happy hanging about with, and they can stay as long as they like really. Eight people for dinner would be way, way too much for me. Five is the most we've had in total, including ourselves and including a child. That's plenty.

                      I am very happy hanging out at a good friend's place, but only really on my own. Parties, anywhere, no ta.


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                        #12
                        Any parties I've had have always been organised events out of the house. I've had an 18th, 21st, 30th, 40th and 50th, and hopefully in a couple of years a 60th. All have been in a room in a pub or club, with someone else cleaning up. I had a couple of house parties on Christmas day in the 90s when everyone was single and childless, I can't imagine doing anything like that again.

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                          #13
                          We used to have people over for dinner parties of 8 or 10, and one other couple did, too. But nobody else was ever arsed to reciprocate, so it sort of died out. It's a hell of a lot of work.

                          Our house has always been the central one for family dos, so we've cleaned/cooked/hosted exponentially more than anyone else in the family.

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                            #14
                            Having a few people over is great. Hosting a party is not. My problem is that my other half loves hosting parties. Or, rather, she thinks she does​​​​​​. What actually happens is that she'll excitedly invite a tonne of people over, for NewYears for example, then for 48 hours before hand she'll stress out about everything making her life and mine miserable. Then once people start arriving she'll get drunk very quickly be the life and soul for a while, while I sort of take care of everyone's needs. She'll zone out for a bit and then get her second wind around 1am, by which time I'm knackered and really just want it to end. Eventually things will wind up round 4 leaving her with the memory of a "fantastic party" ie the bit between 1 & 4. So she'll want to do it again.

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                              #15
                              I fell like I have many thoughts on this, but all it is doing is giving me anxiety. I have no interest in ever having more than 1 other person in my house again. Maybe 2 at a push.

                              (My parents used to host massive parties for many events - Christmas, Easter, Birthdays, Chinese New Year... as a kid it was great because there would be a ton of food and the kids would all go upstairs and play Atari - Summer Games was great for this, or watch movies. Thinking of doing this myself as an adult... gives me hives.)

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                                #16
                                I've read about these people people who rent a suite at a downtown hotel for their Thanksgiving and Easter family dos. They get a traditional meal catered, then just eat, drink, mingle, burp and walk out at the end. Frankly, that sounds like money well spent.

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                                  #17
                                  Originally posted by Benjm View Post
                                  I very much prefer socialising out and about to hosting or visiting other people in their homes.
                                  Nailed it.

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                                    #18
                                    We love hosting dinner parties, it's something I've really missed in the past year. Only did three or four a year for 12-15 people. They weren't often reciprocated, but that didn't matter. Most of our friends are younger than us and still have kids at home, so it was never expected.

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                                      #19
                                      No, I don't.
                                      I always feel like I'm not doing it right and feel unduly put out when people I invite don't show.
                                      And people my age have kids, which make Tonka nervous.

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                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by Amor de Cosmos View Post
                                        We love hosting dinner parties, it's something I've really missed in the past year. Only did three or four a year for 12-15 people. They weren't often reciprocated, but that didn't matter. Most of our friends are younger than us and still have kids at home, so it was never expected.
                                        Ditto. Come any time.

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                                          #21
                                          Not these days, no.

                                          When we moved out of London in 2006, though, it was a different matter. We had something like 70 or 80 people, a live band in the living room, and consequently a visit from the police. I'm definitely too old for that shit nowadays.

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                                            #22
                                            Our house is really too small to have too many people over, especially as we had small kids for the last decade or so, I think the only gathering we hosted was my father's memorial, which actually went fairly well, we got catering from our favorite Mexican place, put his surfboards all over the backyard, and set up rented tables and chairs so that people (we had between 40-50 all told) spent most of the time outside. Everybody seemed to have a great time and since we did it during the afternoon and me and my sister gave our speeches near the end, everybody pretty much started drifting away once the sun started to dip behind the trees, so we were able to do cleanup before we were completely spent.

                                            We also have three couples in our general social circle who are all nature's natural hosters, so we can get our fill of dinner and house parties while only having to worry about transportation to and fro.
                                            Last edited by scratchmonkey; 05-04-2021, 17:24.

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                                              #23
                                              Originally posted by WOM View Post
                                              Also, I read a thing last month about a guy who loves hosting dinners, but always says "You're invited to dinner from 7 - 10 pm", then when 10 o'clock rolls around, he genially says "Well this was lovely, and thank you all for coming" and people pick up and leave. And I'm like 'that's brilliant'. Because we've been 'stuck' with a hanger-on couple until the wee hours when we'd have happily been in bed at 10:30. That's pure agon
                                              Dinner only really begins at 9 here.

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                                                #24
                                                Originally posted by Sporting View Post

                                                Dinner only really begins at 9 here.
                                                Indeed. When we eat [too] late, I usually say 'What are we...Spanish?'

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                                                  #25
                                                  This could be two threads - Do you like the idea of throwing a party?

                                                  and Do you like throwing a party?

                                                  Mrs Bored is having a significant birthday in July and we are thinking cocktails and canapes in the back garden with all our closest friends. The reality will be arguments all morning followed by drinking too early so the whole day goes by in a trice and lots of clearing up to do after.

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