It seems the dementia is going to get my aunt before the cancer does. It's attacking her autonomic systems so she has, for example, lost the ability to swallow. She's minimally conscious, possibly still able to hear, so I chattered down the phone at her for about twenty minutes today, in case she can understand any of it. I shared some happy memories and told her I love her. Listened to my uncle as well. He's her sole carer (plus some professional help) so it's very hard for him. She probably has less than two weeks left. Such a shitty, shitty disease. My aunt is only 74 and could have lived many, many more happy years.
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Dementia - also a bastard
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Also, from a selfish perspective, this is likely to be the first death of an adult that my children have met that I will have to explain to them. They don't know her well, are unlikely to be as upset as I will be, but it's still not a milestone I relish navigating.
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She went peacefully. My uncle was by her side. He got to say goodbye.
I've suggested a small funeral now, under the minimum 30 attendance, and we'll try to have a big memorial next summer, if that type of thing is possible then.
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