Things your parents said, which you no longer could

[Sits]

One of my Dad’s favoured exclamations of surprise was “well I’m blowed”.

It's high time I did me a nil thread.

[hobbes]

"Well I'll be blowed" round our way.

On a related subject, on bake off the other day, the person who got star Baker called her Mum. When she told her, her Mum said something like "bloody hell, I wasn't expecting that" followed by "you should believe in yourself more, not that you will."

And I thought, what a horrible, crushing thing to say to your child. They've just called you to share their happiness at an achievement and you feel the need to use it as an opportunity to belittle them. In front of an audience of millions.
I'd hope I'd never say anything so unpleasant to the cub in that situation.

It's like when I called my Mum a little after the Brexit vote. I was still coming to terms with it all and feeling like my country wasn't mine anymore. I was still feeling constant paranoia as I walked down the street. In short, I was pretty fragile.

Her response? A condescending "Oh don't be so stupid, it'll all be fine."
Needless to say, it was a while before we spoke again.

So anyway, things that I wouldn't say that my parent's generation could.

[The Awesome Berbaslug!!!]

I'd hope I'd never say anything so unpleasant to the cub in that situation

All they'd hear is you swearing, after giving yourself severe carpet burns, after doing an ill-advised celebratory knee slide across the sittingroom.

[S. aureus]

Horrible, crushing things mothers say to their children?
Aged 9 or 10 I wound up having to sing in front of the entire school and parents (can't remember why, some sort of recital thing), froze up and basically managed to produce a few squeaks and not much else. Right after I slunk off the stage, my mother, ever supportive, told me "I've never been so embarrassed in my entire life".
I'm utterly terrified that at some point I'll say something that insensitive to my kids.

[HORN]

My mother would often, with mad, glaring eyes, reprimand me for pretty much anything by demanding "What would the neighbours think?". It's odd that she worried so much about people she so often squared up to in the garden.

"He meant well". My dad's passive defence of me while my mother was thrashing me for something or other. I remember wishing he'd keep his gob shut and instead just wade in to help me.

i don't think this thread will do me one bit of good.

[Amor de Cosmos]

My mother would often, with mad, glaring eyes, reprimand me for pretty much anything by demanding "What would the neighbours think?". It's odd that she worried so much about people she so often squared up to in the garden.

"He meant well". My dad's passive defence of me while my mother was thrashing me for something or other. I remember wishing he'd keep his gob shut and instead just wade in to help me.

i don't think this thread will do me one bit of good.

Oh God, I could rubber stamp both those comments. Plus, whenever I didn't meet expectations a sigh, and then: "Well that's our lad. What do you expect?"

[Billy Casper]

A water tap thingie (technical term) needed turning off, but was in a difficult place to get to at the back of a kitchen cupboard. My dad (in his 70s) had a go at turning it but it was too stiff for him. When he stood up, I bent down to move some stuff out of the cupboard for when the plumber arrived. My dad thought I (in my 40s at the time) was going to have a go at switching off the tap myself...

"You! You can't do that!" he exclaimed.

This was topped though by a throwaway comment about my brother.

"All my kids are decent at spelling - even Matthew."

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Just taking the OP title literally, "Go on (my) son!". The Roginettes are both daughters and I don't think I've ever found out if there's an equivalent. "Go on my daughter!" Does anyone shout that?

[treibeis]

Just taking the OP title literally, "Go on (my) son!". The Roginettes are both daughters and I don't think I've ever found out if there's an equivalent. "Go on my daughter!" Does anyone shout that?

"Go on, girl!"?

[Balderdasha]

My dad always used to say to me "brain the size of a planet, common sense the size of a pea". It's taken me years of therapy to convince myself that I do actually have some common sense.

[Bored Of Education]

Shouldn't this be the "Parents are the worst" thread of World.

My Mum is/was always supportive of us enough to give us super huge egos but there was some damning with faint praise about her calling me the "loud, happy" one of the family one. However, I became the first in my family to get a degree and a first class one at that so where doesn't that you now, Ray, eh? Eh? Well, flying off to Japan to see Wales in the World Cup, I suppose, while I am being sworn at by kids, now I think about it. With the Manics as well who my Mum can drive up to Cardiff to see but her son's band when they are playing there?

See, I haven't even got the "happy" label now.

[Nurse Duckett]

Back in the day when the highest grade at A-Level was A and we were informed by post, my Dad brought me up the envelope on the big day and hung around while I opened it. 3 As and a B. "Hmm, pity about the B". Gee, thanks Dad.

[WOM]

My wife is a type-A, high achiever sort. If you got a 98% on a test, her first question would be 'where did you lose the 2%'? She wouldn't mean it badly. That's just how her brain works. 'What kept it from being perfect?' Me....I hear 60% and think 'woohoo...made it over the line'.

[Lang Spoon]

My gran would refer to some shades of carpet etc as n***** brown. Like she would navy or royal blue.

[Eggchaser]

My paternal grandfather would speak of half-castes. However, from what I remember of him and what my father has told me, I suspect he would be fine with my half caste children, it was more the language of the times.

If anyone was meandering about to no great purpose, my maternal grandmother would say they were "wandering like the lost tribes of Israel".

She would also refer to someone as "erstwhile" but she seemed to think that it meant "lairy", as she'd say, "that erstwhile friend of his" about someone who was a Jack the lad.

[Auntie Beryl]

My mother goes on coach trips to the theatre every so often as part of a club.

On returning from Hamilton, she reported sections of it as being "African fast talking".

My subsequent rant lasted half an hour.

[Sporting]

Not my parents, but my grandfather always used to stand up whenever a woman entered a room in which he was sat. He honestly believed he was being polite and courteous.

[Felicity, I guess so]

My gran would refer to some shades of carpet etc as n***** brown. Like she would navy or royal blue.

I thought there would be more along these lines when I saw the thread title- in our house 'Jewish' was used to mean stingy

[RobM]

Close friend of my mum and dads lifted the weight on me when my dad died by telling me I had extre responsibilities now as I was now 'the man of the house'.

I was 9.

[Sits]

My gran would refer to some shades of carpet etc as n***** brown. Like she would navy or royal blue.

Mrs. S' Glaswegian step mum used to say "he worked like a b***k".

[Nocturnal Submission]

I can't recall my parents saying anything to deliberately belittle me or even to do so by accident. My mum was always positive about my efforts at school and home but my dad's always been reluctant to offer any praise, but that never worried me, (it's much more of an issue for my sister though). And he did rather disappointingly express surprise bordering on incredulity when reporting that, during a rare participation at a parents' evening at my school, one of my teachers had described me as being charismatic.

[Vicarious Thrillseeker]

My gran would refer to some shades of carpet etc as n***** brown. Like she would navy or royal blue.

I think it was a recognised colour description in those times. My nan used to buy wool and cotton in the same colour.

I checked online about this - it seems that the term was used as late as 1973 in The Times, and certain Chinese manufacturers are still applying the description.

[Sam]

Like FIGS, I was expecting this to be a thread of things like my dad referring to a Chinese takeaway as a Chinky.

My parents when I was a kid were to me rather like WOM's wife is to him, which was odd as while my school grades were above average I wasn't a straight-As student, but also because my parents got one O-Level between them. They'd calmed it down enough to be delighted for me when my A B and C at A-Level meant I got into my first (and only, if I'm being honest)-choice university (Manchester), and then were very effusive by their standards (which is to say they hugged me) when I graduated with a first.

That was nice, but I didn't get a sense that they were, like, over the moon about it. Until about two months after said graduation, during a barbecue or something with a bunch of their friends, one of the guests, a lovely woman (all my parents' friends are lovely) came over to me with a big smile and said, 'Oh, Sam, well done on your first. Your mum and dad haven't shut up about it for a moment since you got your result.'

[Bored Of Education]

I thought there would be more along these lines when I saw the thread title- in our house 'Jewish' was used to mean stingy

My Dad used to call me a thieving Arab. He would never do that now. Apart from the racism, I was always taken aback by his pronunciation which was "Aye-rab".

[Guy Profumo]

Half-caste was indeed a phrase my mother had used

Me?

Werll.

There's "Paki Shop" and "Chinky" (for the takeaway) isn't there.