So my friend Mel* is gay. She was telling me today about something that happened at a wedding at the weekend. She met an old uni friend's new boyfriend for the first time who promptly told her "I love lesbians!"
Mel thought that was a bit odd. Her words: "Why? Some of them are wankers." Anyway fast forward to the end of the night and she's saying goodbye to her uni friend and boyfriend, who is a bit drunk and again blurts out "I love lesbians!" But this time added "I'd watch you in porn!"
Mel apparently said "What?" (and believe me when she asks that you know you done gone fucked up big time because she asks it with attitude) and the guy hurriedly went "nothing, nothing" but her unifriend was apparently mortified by it. And Mel and her wife decided it was now definitely time to leave.
So as she told me I was quite shocked. She says she's not sure whether homophobia is the right word for that. I think it's offensiveness based on her sexual orientation. I don't think that guy would say that to a heterosexual woman or couple, and it is grossly crass. So if it's offensive and aimed at her because she is gay I said that qualified it as homophobia to me, anyway.
But is there a better word to describe that kind of behaviour? I'd like to know in case similar discussions arise.
*not really her name
Mel thought that was a bit odd. Her words: "Why? Some of them are wankers." Anyway fast forward to the end of the night and she's saying goodbye to her uni friend and boyfriend, who is a bit drunk and again blurts out "I love lesbians!" But this time added "I'd watch you in porn!"
Mel apparently said "What?" (and believe me when she asks that you know you done gone fucked up big time because she asks it with attitude) and the guy hurriedly went "nothing, nothing" but her unifriend was apparently mortified by it. And Mel and her wife decided it was now definitely time to leave.
So as she told me I was quite shocked. She says she's not sure whether homophobia is the right word for that. I think it's offensiveness based on her sexual orientation. I don't think that guy would say that to a heterosexual woman or couple, and it is grossly crass. So if it's offensive and aimed at her because she is gay I said that qualified it as homophobia to me, anyway.
But is there a better word to describe that kind of behaviour? I'd like to know in case similar discussions arise.
*not really her name
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