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The WTF? Thread

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    The old ones are often the best

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      Originally posted by ursus arctos View Post
      The old ones are often the best
      Preaching to the converted, matey.

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        Haha - Gero taps one in from six inches, (a double entendre, following a double entendre).

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          https://www.theguardian.com/business...n-class-action

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            Yeah, that will arrive just after the extra 350 million a week for the NHS

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              Originally posted by Amor de Cosmos View Post
              All birds look like they want to fuck you up. It's just that most of them aren't big enough. The ones that are can be mean mothers. Personally I wouldn't argue with anything much bigger than a Starling.
              Yeah, one of those "would you rather" questions that the kids these days are into is "Would you rather face a duck-sized lion or a lion-sized duck?" The right answer 100% is "Duck-sized lion." That's just a cat. But so many people get it wrong because they wrongly assume ducks are docile.

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                In more big bird news:
                https://www.theguardian.com/world/20...reeding-season

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                  Aren't they the ones that are delicious?

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                    Originally posted by Hot Pepsi View Post

                    Yeah, one of those "would you rather" questions that the kids these days are into is "Would you rather face a duck-sized lion or a lion-sized duck?" The right answer 100% is "Duck-sized lion." That's just a cat. But so many people get it wrong because they wrongly assume ducks are docile.
                    Just to be pedantic about this, it depends what you mean by a "lion-sized duck". If the duck were simply scaled up to lion size, it would be immobile and unable to survive, much less be a threat to another creature. Land animals don't scale up or down, mainly because scaling multiplies the volume (and hence the weight) of an object by the cube of the scale factor, but merely increases the cross section of the supporting structure (bone and muscle) by the square of the scale factor. So you have to assume some quite substantial modifications, to the point where arguably it's not a "duck", of any size, any more.

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                      Maybe it's best that you don't play this game, EEG.

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                        So what happens to the lion scaled down?

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                          It would essentially be a bad tempered, hairy, ginger housecat. they're all just basically variations of the same thing.

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                            Originally posted by The Awesome Berbaslug!!! View Post
                            Honey Badgers, did someone mention Honey badgers? . Honey Badgers: Masters of Mayhem is my favourite nature documentary ever. Even the name is the best name ever. Much like raccoons, I am torn between the twin impulse of wanting one as a pet, but also being glad that I'm at least 3,000 miles from them.
                            I thought that was going to be this shorter documentary.

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                              "Honey badger smacks the shit out of it".

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                                One for Lang Spoon. People can go and watch professional book dolt Ian McEwan speek his brainz regarding his latest emission at a major arts venue. For twenty fucking pounds - https://www.barbican.org.uk/whats-on...urray-shanahan

                                The cover image adorning the tome is pretty WTF as well.

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                                  Jesus Christ.


                                  Man fixing satellite dish shot with crossbow bolt in Anglesey.

                                  https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-47990900

                                  What the actual fucking fuck?

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                                    Do crossbows have to be registered in the UK?

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                                      Originally posted by Amor de Cosmos View Post
                                      Do crossbows have to be registered in the UK?
                                      All crossbows? That seems impractical.

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                                        We used to make our own, and fire clothes pegs.

                                        In other news:

                                        https://www.cnn.com/2019/04/19/us/bo...nts/index.html

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                                          Originally posted by TonTon View Post

                                          All crossbows? That seems impractical.
                                          No idea, how many are in circulation?

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                                            Worldwide?

                                            I mean, I was making an hilarious joke.

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                                              I know this is a somewhat minor point in the general WTF-ery of that story, but he was on the roof fixing his satellite dish at half past midnight?

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                                                Not necessarily. He raised the alarm at half past midnight. But the police want to know about any suspicious activity from 6pm So maybe he was shot at 7 and took 5 hours to get down and get to a phone

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                                                  Bleach cult

                                                  'Church' to offer 'miracle cure' despite FDA warnings against drinking bleach
                                                  https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/...y_to_clipboard

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                                                    "Tottenham" and "Tottenham Court Road" are entirely unrelated.

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