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The WTF? Thread

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      I can't stop laughing at that cartoon.

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        They can jump nearly 7 feet in the air, run 31 mph "through dense underbrush," are skilled swimmers, and they look like they want to fuck you up.

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          The trafficking of all animals needs to be greatly curtailed and regulated, but the trafficking of dangerous exotic animals is especially egregious.

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            Up until the Middle Ages, Madagascar had elephant birds.



            and this picture was next to the above in google images



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              All birds look like they want to fuck you up. It's just that most of them aren't big enough. The ones that are can be mean mothers. Personally I wouldn't argue with anything much bigger than a Starling.

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                Hmmmm, a starling was trying to build a nest in my roof a few years ago. When we covered the space it was getting in through with wire mesh it spent days aggressively pecking away at it in an attempt to dislodge it.

                I'm going no bigger that a blue tit.

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                  That honey badgers documentary is highly recommended.

                  Particularly for anyone interested in the origins of Berbaslug's posting style.

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                    Thirded on the documentary. They're like small, hairy tanks with no fucks left to give. It's an ace watch.

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                      On the birds / feathered dinosaur thing, it's worth remembering that that is in fact exactly what birds are.

                      My girlfriend had never heard of a cassowary before, so last night we had a look at a few videos on YouTube. There's one filmed by a couple on a beach in Australia, where a cassowary wanders out of a patch of trees and starts following them down the beach. The guy picks up a fallen tree branch to try to distract it and I'm thinking, 'no don't do that, don't make it feel threatened!' The cassowary walks right up the woman's phone (which she's holding on a selfie stick, as a shadow reveals at one point) and starts pecking it, and as the couple walk away it just keeps following them. On a couple of occasions it breaks into a trot to keep up and although I know everything was obviously fine because otherwise the video wouldn't have got uploaded to YouTube, I couldn't help panicking for them. I think it can only have been a young one because they grow 2 metres tall (or as either the BBC or the Graun put it, '6 feet, or 2 metres').

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                        Some more big bird WTF news:

                        https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-sco...ting-along-a82

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                          Originally posted by Bruno View Post

                          and this picture was next to the above in google images


                          The latter looks like Phorusrhacos - a flightless prehistoric bird that could grow to more than eight feet in height.

                          Built like a brick sh*thouse, it could outrun and catch pretty much anything. That soldier would've been disembowelled before he'd even cocked his rifle.

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                            Originally posted by ursus arctos View Post
                            That honey badgers documentary is highly recommended.

                            Particularly for anyone interested in the origins of Berbaslug's posting style.
                            That made me laugh. To which I should add that, much as I admire the tenacity of honey badgers, I'm a huge fan of Berbaslug's tenacity in making his (to my mind thoroughly cogent) points on the Brexit thread.

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                              h[URL="https://twitter.com/CrazyinRussia/status/1118217974308065280"]ttps://twitter.com/CrazyinRussia/status/1118217974308065280[/URL]

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                                The old ones are often the best

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                                  Originally posted by ursus arctos View Post
                                  The old ones are often the best
                                  Preaching to the converted, matey.

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                                    Haha - Gero taps one in from six inches, (a double entendre, following a double entendre).

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                                      https://www.theguardian.com/business...n-class-action

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                                        Yeah, that will arrive just after the extra 350 million a week for the NHS

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                                          Originally posted by Amor de Cosmos View Post
                                          All birds look like they want to fuck you up. It's just that most of them aren't big enough. The ones that are can be mean mothers. Personally I wouldn't argue with anything much bigger than a Starling.
                                          Yeah, one of those "would you rather" questions that the kids these days are into is "Would you rather face a duck-sized lion or a lion-sized duck?" The right answer 100% is "Duck-sized lion." That's just a cat. But so many people get it wrong because they wrongly assume ducks are docile.

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                                            In more big bird news:
                                            https://www.theguardian.com/world/20...reeding-season

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                                              Aren't they the ones that are delicious?

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                                                Originally posted by Hot Pepsi View Post

                                                Yeah, one of those "would you rather" questions that the kids these days are into is "Would you rather face a duck-sized lion or a lion-sized duck?" The right answer 100% is "Duck-sized lion." That's just a cat. But so many people get it wrong because they wrongly assume ducks are docile.
                                                Just to be pedantic about this, it depends what you mean by a "lion-sized duck". If the duck were simply scaled up to lion size, it would be immobile and unable to survive, much less be a threat to another creature. Land animals don't scale up or down, mainly because scaling multiplies the volume (and hence the weight) of an object by the cube of the scale factor, but merely increases the cross section of the supporting structure (bone and muscle) by the square of the scale factor. So you have to assume some quite substantial modifications, to the point where arguably it's not a "duck", of any size, any more.

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                                                  Maybe it's best that you don't play this game, EEG.

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                                                    So what happens to the lion scaled down?

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