World Cup jokes

[Deus Ex Machina]

The past couple of days I keep getting texts with what I believe are attempts at jokes related to the World Cup.

Here are some examples

*Robert Green/BP

*Did you hear the England squad has been struck down by a tropical virus? Every member except the keeper - (I don't understand this, well I think I vaguely do, it might actually not be funny)

Then today
*£2 a month goes to hungry Africans and what do they do? Go buy a trumpet and ruin the World Cup. (Might not even be a joke)

Anyway

1. I don't remember this many jokes at the last World Cup?

2. OTF, make up some good ones for past WCs too, or not, whatever. I just think you'd be good at it.

[Sam]

World Cup jokes

I have absolutely no idea what that first one even means.

[G-Man]

World Cup jokes

£2 a month goes to hungry Africans and what do they do? Go buy a trumpet and ruin the World Cup. (Might not even be a joke)

And this is not racist how?

[Cavalry Trouser Tips]

World Cup jokes

It sounds like the kind of joke Jimmy Carr or Ricky Gervais would tell.

Because they're so outrageous. Can they even say that? etc.

[tracteurgarcon]

World Cup jokes

G.Mandoza wrote:

£2 a month goes to hungry Africans and what do they do? Go buy a trumpet and ruin the World Cup. (Might not even be a joke)

And this is not racist how?

Chris Evans got in trouble for repeating it on Twitter

If anyone wants to hear my pathetic efforts at World Cup jokes I might post them up on here later.

[tracteurgarcon]

World Cup jokes

IXamLKelly wrote:

I have absolutely no idea what that first one even means.

It's to do with "spills", equating the Oil slick in the Gulf of Mexico with Green's spill against USA. I've heard quite a few variations on this theme, none of them even vaguely amusing.

[Hot Orange]

World Cup jokes

Wingco's variation was pretty funny.

[Etienne]

World Cup jokes

"Rob Green faced 4000 shots in training yesterday, and didn't let in a single goal. Today he and Emil Heskey rejoined the rest of the squad."

From 5Live, and although I agree Emil is an easy target, quite nicely done.

The Africa 2 pounds a day joke is vile.

[tracteurgarcon]

World Cup jokes

Heet Oranje wrote:

Wingco's variation was pretty funny.

Forgot about his one, goes without saying really that his would be good.

[G-Man]

World Cup jokes

It sounds like the kind of joke Jimmy Carr or Ricky Gervais would tell.

Because they're so outrageous. Can they even say that? etc.

Yeah, context and all. But there the joke is on us, really. In isolation, it is not only not very funny at all, but, as Etienne rightly puts it, vile.

And with jokes like that, does anybody really want to claim that opposition to the vuvuzela has no racist dimension, and that South Africans are being silly for thinking there is one?

[G-Man]

World Cup jokes

Anyway, that should be on the other thread.

The world cup joke I liked best so far:

It has been reported from the England training camp that Rob Green conceded kept a clean sheet in 1,000 shots on goal.

After that, he and Heskey joined the rest of the squad.

[Etienne]

World Cup jokes

I think "racist dimension" just is too imprecise. Some people obviously dislike it and are racist. Some people dislike it and are not racist. I don't actually think that anyone dislikes it because they are racist.

[G-Man]

World Cup jokes

Yes, of course. If anybody thought that I ever said that hating the vuvuzela equals racism didn't read me carefully. I mean, I don't like it myself.

I don't actually think that anyone dislikes it because they are racist.

Not neccesarily. But racists and xenophobes and afrosceptics are using their dislike for the vuvuzela as a stick to beat SA with (as jv put it so well in his post on that other thread).

[Etienne]

World Cup jokes

Yes. But that doesn't delegitimise criticism of them. Whether they are a good thing or a bad thing (I think they are a bad thing) or should be banned or not (I don't think they should from this World Cup but would happily ban them from cricket grounds) shouldn't be affected by what those morons think, and we shouldn't let their idiocy frame or affect the debate. After all, for cretins like that, if it's not the vuvuzuelas it;d be some other stick.

[G-Man]

World Cup jokes

But that doesn't delegitimise criticism of them

Of course not. I never claimed it does. But because of the way racists are using opposition to the vuvuzela — for example, as in that "joke" — that criticism must be defined carefully so as to avoid association with the racist dimension. Or all criticism risks being tainted by that association.

[Mumpo]

World Cup jokes

Did your hear about Sophie Ellis Bextor?

[RobM]

World Cup jokes

Ladysmith Black Mumpozo wrote:

Did your hear about Sophie Ellis Bextor?

No.

[Otto Katz]

World Cup jokes

She rejoined Emil Heskey in a hotel room in Paris.

[tracteurgarcon]

World Cup jokes

Ladysmith Black Mumpozo wrote:

Did your hear about Sophie Ellis Bextor?

Wasn't she found dead in one of the Ivory Coast's striker's room?

[Sam]

World Cup jokes

Why is everyone (alright, two people) spelling Emile Heskey's first name without its final 'e' all of a sudden?

Also in the OP, I didn't realise 'Rob Green/BP' WAS the joke. I thought it was the heading to the one below it. So allow me to rephrase: I have no idea what that second one even means.

[Sam]

World Cup jokes

OH! It's a variation on 'couldn't catch a cold'.

I've also just realised that Etienne and Otto are making a joke about Heskey's finishing.

As you were.

[mafu]

World Cup jokes

is it missing the words 'caught it' from the end?

[Guy Profumo]

World Cup jokes

Holden Midfielder wrote:

Then today
*£2 a month goes to hungry Africans and what do they do? Go buy a trumpet and ruin the World Cup. (Might not even be a joke).

You're quite right. It isn't.

[Logan Mountstuart]

World Cup jokes

This is a good one I heard on Radio 5 the other day:

Name the England player who played against his teacher in the 1998 World Cup.

[Mumpo]

World Cup jokes

Paul Schools?