Eurotwat

[Benjm]

Eurotwat

Does Marouane Fellaini dying his hair blonde earn him any points?

Only if he accessorises it properly.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Eurotwat

This is hard, this year, with no Holland. Half their team used to pick themselves.

[Levin]

Eurotwat

My selection is pretty much random. ANd I've already had third and fourth thoughs about some of these.

Iker Casillas (ESP)

Dier (ENG) Škrtel (SVK) Djourou (SUI) Alves (POR) Pepe (POR)

Pogba (FRA) Chipciu (ROM) Fellaini (BEL) Whelan (IRL)

Gera (HUN)

[Benjm]

Eurotwat

Levin wrote: My selection is pretty much random.

Perish the thought!

BTW, I missed seeing Les Blancs last week due to an eye infection, which was annoying.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Eurotwat

Les Toits are in. I noticed the points for diving to win stuff so I went for Raheem Sterling. If he doesnt dive to win us a pen he's a shoe-in for selfie stick points.

[N est ā?]

Eurotwat

Might be an idea to load up on practising muslims (I've got three, I think, across the midfield), in the hope that Ramadan fasting in midsummer leads to poor form and tetchiness.

Obviously, crass religious stereotyping and discredited Victorian era racial science are positively to be encouraged as criteria for selecting twatballers.

[evilC]

Eurotwat

N est ā? wrote: Might be an idea to load up on practising muslims (I've got three, I think, across the midfield), in the hope that Ramadan fasting in midsummer leads to poor form and tetchiness.

Obviously, crass religious stereotyping and discredited Victorian era racial science are positively to be encouraged as criteria for selecting twatballers.

If they happen to read this board - and thread - then their tetchiness will probably have just been ramped up a notch, certainly.

I'm relying on phrenology, myself.

[evilC]

Eurotwat

Strathcarnage Twats are on board:

G: Neuer

D: Alves, Baird, Pepe, Ramos, Skrtel

M: Alli, Fellaini, Schneiderlin, Wilshere

F: Rooney

I'd like to think that's quite a strong squad, in twat terms.

However, I'm torn to have to cut Marko Arnautovic, Akos Elek and Yevchen Khacheridi. I may regret the latter two, in particular.

BTW - I couldn't decide who to pick as goalie, so I went for Neuer, simply on the basis that he's one of the goalies most likely to pick up yellow cards for time-wasting. With England going out at the group stage after three draws, we will have been playing hurry-up for a lot of the time, conversely.

(edit 1: I was a bit miffed that they've misspelt Wilshere's surname. He was the very first person I searched for, but soon gave up, thinking the game was fucked. However, when I saw the full England squad, the reason for his elusiveness became clear!)

(edit 2: I chose Rooney on the basis of him being the forward most convinced he's a defender.)

(edit 3: The full list of players is here, where you can check on their points totals (once the game has started) and - for now - how many people have currently chosen them. From my own selection, the popular Pepe is way out in front, with 143 selections, but I'm surprised that I'm one of only two people to have selected Schneiderlin, given that he is one of the 20 dirtiest Premier League players over the last 5 years.)

[Toby Gymshorts]

Eurotwat

Having started the thread, shamefully I haven't sorted my team. Does your old login work?

[N est ā?]

Eurotwat

I'd recommend perusing some published journals of Victorian travellers through the Balkans before committing.

"the Albanian, generous natured and not quick to anger, nevertheless makes for an fierce and implacable enemy once offended. The women of the country are industrious and not ill-favoured..."

[Gerontophile]

Eurotwat

My lot:

Pyatov (Ukraine)

Cahill (Ingerland)
Durica (Slovakia)
Agolli (Albania)
Djourou (Switzerland)
Evra (France)

Inan (Turkey)
Baumgartlinger (Switzerland)
Wernbloom (Sweden)

Nani (Portugal)
Zlatan (Omnipotent)

[Gerontophile]

Eurotwat

Kyle Lafferty yesterday.

[evilC]

Eurotwat

gérontophile wrote: My lot:

Pyatov (Ukraine)

-

[N est ā?]

Eurotwat

Also, the kick off times on the fixture list seem to be set to Greenlandic time. (UTC-2)

[Toby Gymshorts]

Eurotwat

Right. I have to sort this tonight.

[Toby Gymshorts]

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The French Mistake are IN.

[Duncan Gardner]

Eurotwat

gérontophile wrote: Kyle Lafferty yesterday.

2009 was yesterday?

Apart from feigning injury to get opponent sent off, the big man's resume includes:

- shagging the chairman's daughter in every port from Sicily to the Caspian during his recent loan tour

- managing more Miss Scotlands than EPL games this term

- being replaced as NI strike spearhead by a succession of part-time fat lads from the Irish Leagues

- pointlessly smacking some diving Portuguese as we blew a goal lead with an extra man

[Toby Gymshorts]

Eurotwat

I've realised that you can't edit your team once submitted.

Balls.

[Duncan Gardner]

Eurotwat

Ditto. I got my Romanian anklebiters mixed up.

[Felicity, I guess so]

Eurotwat

I'm in, as a novice, but haven't quite sorted my team yet. Or its name.

EDIT: Bande de cons ā part (formerly known as Agricultural Challenge FC). Some shots in the dark, here- couldn't resist a Basha in midfield though.

Roy Carroll Northern Ireland (0)

Sergio Ramos Spain (0) Martin Škrtel Slovakia (0) Pepe Portugal (0)

Dele Alli England (0) Migjen Basha Albania (0) Mihai Pintilii Romania (0) Kim Källström Sweden (0)

Kyle Lafferty Northern Ireland (0) Wayne Rooney England (0) Cristiano Ronaldo Portugal (0)

[Guy Profumo]

Eurotwat

Early points for David de Gea

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/international/david-de-gea-accusations-euro-2016-spain-squad-sent-home-manchester-united-news-a7074711.html

[Guy Profumo]

Eurotwat

Dunkerque- Gare de Nord wrote: Ditto. I got my Romanian anklebiters mixed up.

Yes.

This.

(Also to the good Mr Gymshorts)

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

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So annoyed I didn't pick Patrice Evra, now. He was an obvious choice.

[matt j]

Eurotwat

Ditto.

[Toby Gymshorts]

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So. Cota out in front early doors, but it's still all to twat for.