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X11 season 45 - de rigueur Mortis

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    I really need to learn to convert draws into victories. Wensleydale were relegated despite having the third best defence in the league, losing only one more game than both Rejects Redux (2nd) and Csiki Monkeys (3rd). I only managed 14 goals all season, which saw The Blues pick up a measly number of wins (4) over the course of the season.


      Originally posted by Various Artist View Post
      I know, it's only the MLX Cup final I've made a point of previewing, ever since I was just a league assistant who wanted to make sure the 'second' competition received its equal due rather than letting the playoffs get everyone's attention. I've occasionally done something for the MLX Grand Final too, but only very intermittently and at more or less random, when I've had time in the relevant week. Alas nobody else has ever stepped up to write those instead, at least for more than a one-off, and to be honest it's just been yet another thing to do that I've not found time for. I will though work it into the season roundup, which again is something I don't do consistently but do try to get at least something written for. That should happen tonight, I hope, after which I'll be able to set up Season 29 too.
      No obligations.


        Originally posted by Sits View Post

        No obligations.

        I really appreciate all the match reports, reviews and previews along with everything else on this thread.

        But if it ever becomes an obligation or a chore I'd hate to be responsible for making anyone feel obliged.


          Originally posted by Me Old Flower View Post
          I really need to learn to convert draws into victories. Wensleydale were relegated despite having the third best defence in the league, losing only one more game than both Rejects Redux (2nd) and Csiki Monkeys (3rd). I only managed 14 goals all season, which saw The Blues pick up a measly number of wins (4) over the course of the season.
          That one time when the Kneebiters won the OTF league, we had a freakishly high number of one-goal victories. In other seasons, many of those would have been draws.


            Originally posted by Various Artist View Post
            The Biters are sure of 5th, unless they win by 13 today at Veni Vici Vigata to overhaul Weds on GD.
            Barely A Spoiler Alert: we did not win by 13 today at Veni Vici Vigata.


              It's all very well the Swine having a decent season and going up but we have two "young" retirees now (Krusdam and Newton) so I'm entertaining no expectations of carrying any momentum into the OTF. On the contrary I'm expecting total adversity.


                How Did You Do with How Will You Do?
                As promised, here's my OTF prediction review, ranking (in my opinion) from most accurate to least.

                nmrfox Whoft Fluffopolis
                Prediction: "I'll plump for fifth" :
                Reality: Fifth!

                Wouter D Nieuwegein Kneebiters
                Prediction: "We'll float around in the middle regions"
                Reality: Fifth out of nine, aka dead middle. Apart from the second week, was never outside fourth or fifth place.

                ad hoc AFC Csiki Monkeys
                Prediction: "We'll scrape up in 3rd"
                Reality: Third, but acquired promotion in a less than scrape-y manner.

                Hot Orange Hideous Towns
                Prediction: "Let's be ambitious and say we're hoping to win a game."
                Reality: Three wins, albeit relegation did beckon.

                Various Artist Vita Mortis
                Prediction: "We might finish anywhere from 2nd to 8th I reckon, so will say 5th"
                Reality: Second, but nearly completely screwed up the prediction by leading into the final day.

                lambers Hampshire Deers
                Prediction: "I'd be surprised if we weren't in a relegation battle"
                Reality: In danger for most of the season, but achieved safety in the penultimate game.

                Gawpus Great Ouse Town
                Prediction: "I have a sneaking suspicion it'll be more bad than good"
                Reality: More good than bad, finishing fourth and never in danger of relegation.

                Sits Berkshire Swine
                Prediction: "Mid table would be fine."
                Reality: First in Division 1, last in predictions.


                  Solid work lambers!


                    Xpert XI official Ladies League Season 60, Matchday 6 report.

                    Division 1a
                    ChromosomXX                0 - 2   Drakaina
                                                       Gitsis 7', 38'
                    Division 2b
                    Mauchline Belles           0 - 0   White Swans
                    Division 3d
                    The Liver                  1 - 1   Coxy Ladies Wulpen
                    Starr 66'                          Frunz? 26'
                                                       van Sttenberghe (missed pen) 22'
                    Division 3e
                    Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC     1 - 1   Sabugal BDV
                    Pailloux 71'                       Verde 38'
                                                       Verde (sent off) 93'
                    Division 4i
                    Viking South Utsira        2 - 1   Liverpool FCL
                    N.Austrheim 48'                    Castelli 71'
                    B.Kvalvik 79'
                    Division 5:17
                    LNWR Locomotive            1 - 1   FC Valkyrie
                    Arredondo 79'                      Bouzo 12'
                    Division 5:22
                    Mupparna                   2 - 0   Bombay Green Rockets
                    Tell 49'
                    Skaar 78'
                    Division 5:28
                    Menywod Maeshafn           0 - 0   Evil daughters
                    Red Lips                   2 - 0   Cassiopeia
                    McCann (pen) 4'
                    Mella 77'
                    Division 5:32
                    Dream Girls Focsani        1 - 0   Csiki Girls
                    Gessle 91'
                    Division 6:27
                    Brisbane Roar Ladies       1 - 0   I Cinghiali
                    Division 6:33
                    Miss Dopportunities        0 - 1   Rising Stars
                                                       Andorinha 37'
                    Division 6:38
                    Ullapool Northern Star     4 - 0   IFK Penny Lane
                    Wailer 19'
                    Klovning 24', 72'
                    Festas 27'
                    Division 6:41
                    The Byt                    0 - 6   Hazeldean Inchmistress
                                                       Tattershall 1'
                                                       Bringevik 6', 24', 28'
                                                       Bunton 19', 92'
                    Division 6:43
                    ASU Politehnica            0 - 0   The Devilettes
                    Invisible Ladies           3 - 0   Mighty Minxes
                    Shuttlewood 37'
                    Parks 54', 91'
                    Division 6:52
                    Zeugma Dostluk Spor        4 - 0   FC Cristal Dorohoi
                    Kurt 8'
                    Kulakova 12'
                    Mansiz 34', 51'
                    Division 6:56
                    Dublin City Womens FC      5 - 0   Adul
                    Gruszka 1'
                    Lynch 5'
                    Timmermans 7'
                    Lyktberg 12'
                    Maaranen 15'
                    Winning was imperative for Drakaina when The Dragons, bottom of Division 1a, visited the team a place above themselves, ChromosomXX.
                    To win you have to score, which is something Etienne’s team had found difficult all season. Indeed you could attribute their troubles directly to a lack of goals (though that is not saying much, given you could attribute most every struggling teams problems to not scoring enough…). So going 1-0 up through Elena Gitsis’ breakaway strike was very good news for the Greeks.
                    Gitsis was done for the half either, heading a second 7 minutes form the end of it to add to her opener 7 minutes after it started. 2-0 wasn’t flattering to Drakaina either as The Dragons had been clearly the better side in the first half. The second was more even, but that was mostly because the visitors didn’t need to score again as long as they didn’t concede. Which they didn’t.
                    Victory lifted The Dragons off the bottom of the 1a table but only up to seventh. They remain a point adrift of the target spot for survival.

                    Similar thoughts about ‘must win’ and ‘need to score some goals’ pertained to Mauchline Belles meeting with fellow Division 2b strugglers White Swans.
                    The sides had only managed six goals between them over the previous five rounds of matches, which suggested that any strike either managed stood a good chance of being the winner. Both sides created enough chances to nab it, with Jdsx’s Belles making more opportunities from a good majority of the ball. But in keeping with both side’s form so far this season, actually putting the ball in the net proved beyond either.
                    A single point from a scoreless draw was not great for Mauchline, and made worse by a shock score from elsewhere that saw the side they were trying to chase down, Van Helsings GLS, toppled league leaders Misconduct United. It leaves The Belles four points adrift of safety, though they remain sixth in the 2b standings.

                    The imperative was different for Coxy Ladies Wulpen – rather than ‘must win’ it was more ‘stop drawing all the bloomin time’ for Janik’s side. The latest attempt to avoid sharing the spoils came at The Liver.
                    The Waders had help from an unexpected source in this game as referee Al Beback turned out to be very much on their side. First he disallowed a seemingly legitimate goal for The Liver, and then, on 22 minutes, he gave Wulpen a dodgy penalty. Eva van Sttenberghe shoulder the responsibility… and saw her shot saved!
                    Having blown that chance, Coxy Ladies could have gone into their shells. Instead they went ahead just four minutes later, Luminita Frunz? heading home a corner. Further chances came at regular intervals for the Belgians for the rest of the first half and the early part of the second. But they couldn’t find the finishing touch for the second, and paid the price when their hosts levelled on 66 minutes.
                    If Wulpen fans were on edge that their team would throw away even a point from a game they should have won, then they weren’t paying attention – this was yet another draw in the making. Wulpen’s fourth from six games. Despite only having won once, The Waders are still fourth in the Division 3e standings, but are closer to the foot of the table (2 points) then the top (6 points).

                    Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC first win of the campaign in the previous round of games had edged them just in front of Sabugal BDV in the Division 3e standings ahead of the teams meeting at Merapi-Kraton-South Sea.
                    The Sea Spirits had generally the better of the first half, only to be hit with a sucker punch when one of Sabugal’s few attacks of the period produced their only chance of the 45 minutes, but one they converted. SeanoftheShed’s charges kept plugging away after the break, and got their deserved reward when Ad?le Pailloux fired in from long range to level matters on 71 minutes.
                    Sabugal were to finish with only 10 players after their goalscorer, Beatriz Verde, saw her second yellow card of the afternoon. This came deep into second-half stoppage time though, which didn’t give The Sea Goddesses much of a chance to use their woman advantage.
                    The draw kept the two sides in fifth and sixth spots respectively in the 3e table.

                    When Division 4i’s only unbeaten side, Viking South Utsira, welcomed the only winless one, Liverpool FCL to Ragnar Rock, only one outcome seemed likely. What with The Blood Eagles top and the Reds bottom.
                    Liverpool were working hard in defence though, frustrating Velvet Android’s side during the first half. Indeed Viking were grateful to ref Seymour Red for a disallowed Liverpool goal that allowed them to go into the break still all square.
                    The deadlock was broken soon after the interval… in Utsira’s favour, Nina Austrheim racing clear of the visitors defence and slotting home. But things still didn’t get easier for The Blood Eagles, who were still only one ahead when an isolated Liverpool attack produced an unexpected equaliser on 71 minutes.
                    VSU redoubled their efforts after that, which paid dividends eight minutes later when Bergljot Kvalvik turned home a corner to restore their advantage. This time decisively, but it was only fair to acknowledge the scare Liverpool had given them. As boss VA did in the comments.
                    The league table made for very good reading for Blood Eagles fans after the game as nearest rivals Warriors FC lost, leaving Viking five points clear of the chasing pack.

                    LNWR Locomotive had won more games than their week six opponents FC Valkyrie, but Valkyrie were unbeaten whilst The Steamers weren’t. How so? Lots of draws, and few goals for the Warrior Maidens.
                    Less than one a game on average in fact as Valkyrie arrived at Mollington Street having scored three and only conceded one. Which meant it was rather a blow for Viktor Boskovic’s side when they fell 1-0 down after 12 minutes play.
                    Locomotive had the better of the rest of the game in general play, but foundered repeatedly on Valykrie’s iron-clad defence. And some leather as well… The Steamers preserved though, and did get a couple of sights of goal after the break. Notably when Constanza Arredondo rose to head a corner powerfully home on 79 minutes and claim a point.
                    Good from the position LNWR found themselves in, but not enough to prevent them slipping a spot to sixth in the Division 5:17 table. Which is below the relegation line, of course.

                    Bombay Green Rockets are also fighting against dropping into the bottom tier. The Rockets had given themselves a boost with a big win the previous week, but would it be enough to overcome the drag of leaders Mupparna, who had a perfect record.
                    What is also a drag was the leaders kit, which is far from perfect. Rather more than a drag, really. Horrid, actually. Their manager appears to be a pea-brain. Seeing as we don’t want to cover such a prat any longer than we have to, I’ll just say this wasn’t Bombay’s day, HKS3’s side succumbing 2-0.
                    To make matters worse for The Green Rockets, the two sides directly above themselves, and also only just on the other side of the Division 5:22 drop line at the start of play, both won. It means that though Bombay remain sixth, they are now four points adrift of the current safety mark.


                      Those in search of goals would not have been making a beeline for North Wales and the match between Menywod Maeshafn and Evil daughters. Not when IsThatcherDeadYet’s side stood as the exuberant one of the two outfits, with their wild 1-3-1 3-4 record. And yes, that is comparatively wild, when the comparator was Evil daughters frankly astonishing 0-3-2 0-2 analysis!
                      Could Maeshafn make a breakthrough? And could they avoid shipping a goal, that would almost certainly mean defeat? Yes to the second question, and fairly comfortably at that, Evil daughters only registering a single unsuccessful shot in the 90 minutes. But sadly no to the first as the Welsh side’s three efforts also went unrewarded as the game finished as the least surprising 0-0 draw ever.
                      Would Cassiopeia’s trip to Red Lips provide more excitement? Well, it could hardly produce less, could it?
                      As it turned out it only took 4 minutes for something more memorable to happen in this game. Sadly for The Vainglories, that was a highly contentious penalty to Red Lips that they put away. Stormstopper’s side never really got to grips with the game following that, and though they clung on at 1-0 up until well into the final quarter of the game, they never looked likely to equalise. Once it became 2-0 on 77 it was game over.
                      The net effect of those results was Cassiopeia dropping a single but crucial spot to sixth in the Division 5:28 table. Maeshafn remain fourth, now two points ahead of the drop zone. But also five adrift of the play-off spot.

                      Unbeaten all season and on the back of a win makes it sound like Csiki Girls were flying ahead of their trip to Dream Girls Focsani, but actually Ad hoc’s side were only a couple of points ahead of their hosts, who started the match in the drop zone.
                      The Csikis shaded a tight first half and would have been ahead if Dick Tator had allowed Hillary Strouts 24th minute strike. But he didn’t, and both teams struggled to fashion another sight of goal. In fact the game got as far as second half stoppage time before either got within shooting range again. However when Foscani did in the 91st minute, they put it away to snatch all the points.
                      And just like that Csiki Girls unbeaten record was gone, leaving the Transylvanians with a 1-4-1 record. Those seven points are only enough to sit sixth in the Division 5:32 table.

                      Two unbeaten sides clashed when Division 6:27 leaders I Cinghiali headed to the Suncorp Stadium to take on third-placed side Brisbane Roar Ladies.
                      The Boars found themselves playing on the counter-attack in the first half, but were doing it decently as they held Roar chanceless despite their possessional edge whilst SitsWithRemote’s side created two chances of their own. Cinghiali didn’t score either, which proved costly when Brisbane showed them how it was done by converting their first opening of the match in the 48 the minute.
                      The Boars tried to respond, but just couldn’t land a decent punch on Brisbane in the remaining time and therefore slipped to a first defeat of the season. Top spot in the table went with it, Cinghiali dropping to second on goal difference. Brisbane, still third, are a point further back.

                      The top two sides in Division 6:27, both with identical 4-1-0 records, clashed when Rising Stars visited Regret Central to take on Miss Dopportunities.
                      A tight game would have been expected; one ensued. There was very little between the sides in the first half, but all the major statistical categories were tipped very slightly in The Stars direction in this period. Including the all-important one, Pen?lope Andorinha firing Blamb’s side ahead on 37 minutes.
                      In the second half it was Dopportunities who fractionally shaded things with 52% possession, the same as Rising had had before the break, and 2-1 on chances. But unlike The Stars, the hosts… well, just look at their name. That will tell you what they did, and didn’t, do.
                      So a good day for Rising, but not for everyone as one of their players left Regret Central feeling its name was very apt – Hua Wa picking up a 14-day injury. Given her importance to the Rising side, she won’t be alone in being rueful. But there was also celebration as by winning the top-of-the-table clash, Rising took over as leaders.

                      Ullapool Northern Star are chomping through the zombies at the moment, the latest being IFK Penny Lane. Which is not a sexist name, but is one with it’s own issues. Hopefully the next manager in the door at that club will change it.
                      But we can focus on Polaris here. Delicatemoth’s side navigated this particular test straightforwardly, a three goal burst just before the half-hour ending the match as a contest. The first was a landmark goal for young midfielder Amy Wailer as it was the first of her senior career. That came from range on 19 minutes, and was followed from closer in by strikes from Renate Klovning (24) and Irene Festas (27).
                      Just one further strike was added after the break, Klovning getting her second of the afternoon on 72 minutes. The win lifted Ullapool up a spot to second in the Division 6:38 table after the previous leaders, Championettes, drew with one of the other non-zombies in the section (there are only four) and fell to third. Northern Star face Championettes next, with a one point advantage but trailing new leaders Fair Maidens of FISO by a point.


                        Hazeldean Inchmistress also had a tiresome zombie problem to deal with when they visited The Byt.
                        The Imperials were not in a mood to let this take longer than absolutely necessary to clear up, opening the scoring inside 60 seconds when the first attack of the game won a free-kick that Mollie Tattershall, and then going on to add four more before half-an-hour had elapsed as forwards Jennie Bringevik and Karen Bunton weighed in.
                        Bringevik completed a first-half hattrick and a perfect one at that, turning home a 6th minute corner with her left, heading home another corner on 19 and then finishing from close range with her right on 29 minutes. Bunton added one between Bringevik’s first and second with a header on 19 minutes, and later got her own second of the day in second half stoppage time. Yet another header.
                        The win lifted Foxy265’s side up a place to fourth in the Division 6:41 standings. They are four points adrift of the play-off spot, and only six behind the previously imperious looking leaders Fuego Eagles, whose wings were clipped for the first time this season when being held to a stalemate by the side in second.

                        ASU Politehnica welcomed Division 6:43 leaders The Devilettes to Timisoara for their matchday 6 encounter.
                        The Scholars went into the game looking to reduce the gap that has build up between themselves and the league leaders. Or at least let it get no bigger, as actually taking down The Devilettes was going to be difficult given they were unbeaten, with four wins from five. And indeed it was the visitors who had the better of the general play. However Politehnica were keeping chances for the Satan’s Girls to a minimum, with just two in each half.
                        But let’s not pretend here – Granthamian’s side were under the cosh, and hanging on for a point. That they managed it is impressive, and that a single second-half chance to steal all three came and went unconverted it’s a criticism. If it had been, it would have been a travesty really.
                        The Devilettes being held opened the opportunity for their title rivals, Invisible Ladies. All it was going to take for PebbletheFish’s side to assume top spot was a win over Mighty Minxes. And they are zombies.
                        Reasonably good at defending zombies, though, with just 11 conceded from their opening five games. Which meant The See-Throughs needed to be patient, and keep believing that opener would come. That is precisely what they did, plugging away until Aileen Shuttlewood headed home a corner in the 37th minute. Sandie Parks fired in a second on 54 minutes which let The San Seethrough faithful relax about their game and send the positive vibes over to Romania to ask Politehnica to hang on.
                        As we know that was successful, and this game was also a done deal after Parks added her second of the day and her side’s third in stoppage time.
                        Invisible are now two points clear at the top of the 6:43 standings. Let’s see if anyone notices they are there… Politehnica stay fifth, five points back of The Devilettes, who are now the target as they have dropped to second place.

                        The perfect perfect record still stood for Zeugma Dostluk Spor, i.e. not just five wins from five, but no goals conceded in those game after matchday 5. Matchday 6 threatened to challenge it as the Anatolians were up against FC Cristal Dorohoi, third in the table and actively managed.
                        But if this was going to be the game that ended the runaway start, then Antepli Ejderha’s players appear not to have received the notification. ZDS started on fire, scoring on 8 minutes when Latife Kurt headed home a corner, and then again on 12 when Veronika Kulakova raced clear and slotted home.
                        Zeugma calmed down a little after that, whilst still being clearly the better side. And even at a slightly lower tempo the Turks futher padded their lead, Makbule Mansiz turning home a corner on 34 minutes to make it 3-0. The same player headed a fourth six minutes into the second half.
                        The rest of the game was concerned with ZDS keeping their seasonal clean sheet intact. Which they did, preserving with it their leadership of Division 6:52. However Zeugma are not the only side boasting a perfect perfect record – second-placed The Lillywhites have also won six from six without conceding. They are second only because they have scored one goal less than AE’s girls. With third in the table, which is still Dorohoi, barely on more than half the points of the leading pair (10 compared to 18), the next two rounds of games look highly likely to decide the destination of the 6:52 title.

                        Promotion chasers Dublin City Womens FC were expecting a simple encounter when bottom-of-the-table zombies Adul visited The Heart Stadium.
                        Mortal Joe’s side seemingly had something else on on Tuesday evening, as they were in an extreme rush to get things done. So much so in fact, that they knocked off just 15 minutes into this game. But by then the score was already 5-0 to the home side, half of whose outfielder players had goals to their names.
                        It took less than 10 seconds for Elwira Gruszka to open the scoring as she tried a speculative shot from close to 40 yards out. Rosaleen Lynch headed a second on 5 minutes, and Emma Timmermans turned home a third on 7. After a brief lull, Maria Lyktberg converted a 12th minute corner, followed by Jutta Maaranen netting a breakaway.
                        Dublin then went into cruise mode, only rousing themselves once in the rest of the match. But Camelia Rusu’s 36th minute effort was disallowed. No matter, the five from the opening fifteen was more than ample. Meanwhile, elsewhere in Division 6:56, a result dropped Dublin’s way as third-placed side Pretty Ladies beat leaders Skills FC. That allowed The Dubs to leapfrog Skills and move top of the table. This time the fast start looks like being converted into a sustain title push.


                          Nice one Janik; I particularly admire the way you avoided mentioning the team now leading our division.


                            No Division 1 OTF derby in the Golden League as the Csiki Sods and Curly Coats have been drawn apart.


                              There will be a OTF Derby in the Golden League in the first round of the Cup. Dublin City FC are hosting Violett-Weiss 1919, which are managed from _DRC, who is the manager of Wharfedale Generals. We won't stand a chance but that is okay, because we are in development mode and are far from competitive mode.


                                Division 2b has Auntie Beryl and Bill Bones, we're in 2d and have no derby.

                                2c has a team, JS De Tinchebray, who's previous two managers exist. They are a zombie at the moment. I only looked as their manager was Foxy McFoxy.


                                  OTF Season 60 Round 18 Round-Up

                                  Where to start? Well, I suppose the title deciding clash between the top two is as good a place as any. Monday's results had left Vita Mortis in pole position, two points ahead of Kernow Kensa and therefore only needing to avoid defeat at The Hollows to claim their third title. They went into the game unbeaten on their own patch this season and with reason to be confident, even if their last three home games had been draws. However, they found Kernow in inspired form on the day. The visitors, putting the disappointment of their shock defeat at Zeugmaspor behind them, dominated from the outset and were ahead on 16 minutes when Arthur Cooper collected Kim Gronros' pass and placed the ball past Mortis keeper Howard Stant. Minutes later, they thought they had a second as Bernt Rav's lob nestled in the back of the net, but he had strayed offside. Mortis nearly pulled level when Edmond Bleuet found space in the box from a free kick, but his header struck the post. With that went the home side's best opportunity as Kernow reasserted their dominance and clinched the three points and a debut title midway through the second half when Dean Booker squeezed the ball home from an angle, again assisted by Gronros. The Cornish side thus become the third consecutive first-time champions, following the successes of Four Candles and St Pancras Starmers in the last two seasons.

                                  The remaining games were all dead rubbers, the relegation issues having been decided on Monday. Dandy Town and Great Ouse Town stay in 3rd and 4th after they drew 1-1 at Stade Andy Liver. Both goals came in the final ten minutes, Sakal Boman briefly putting the Dandies ahead before Nickie Helmsford equalised. Croesoswallt Dragons finish in 5th following a 3-1 win at Banik Roystonov, who end up bottom of the pile having been top of it after three games. Four Candles moved above St Pancras Starmers into 6th after defeating them 3-1 at Hurlingham Park, with 18-year-old Rafael Vikander among the goals. Relegated duo Zeugmaspor and Hideous Towns also swapped places, the former moving up to 8th with a second consecutive 2-1 victory, though Towns' 17-year-old striker Mateo Forlan took the honours in the day's youngest-goalscorer contest.

                                  Division 1

                                  The permutations concerning the final promotion place were eloquently laid out by VA in his round-up of Monday's games, so I won't go into them again here, particularly as the outcome was done and dusted with minimal fuss at the Mack Mean Megadrome, where the incumbents of that third spot, Rejects Redux, easily saw off Whoft Fluffopolis 3-0 to secure their return to the top flight. The Fluffers miss out, therefore, and finish in 5th behind Locomotiv Noj, whose 3-0 victory over 7th-but-safe Hampshire Deers was in vain due to the Rejects' success. Saltney Drawers' chances of pinching the promotion spot were always remote and they were never at the races in their 3-0 home defeat by champions Berkshire Swine, for whom Cristofao Edilson buried two free kicks and set up Huub Scheenaard from another. The Swine finished an astonishing 15 points clear at the top as a carefree AFC Csiki Monkeys side slipped to 3rd behind the Rejects following a 1-0 home defeat by relegated Wensleydale Blues. Incidentally, if the league is to see a fourth consecutive first-time champion next season, the Rejects and the Monkeys are the only candidates. The game between the already-relegated bottom two of Steaua Bridge and Turd Division had a pleasingly bonkers end-of-term feel to it. Steaua raced into a 3-0 lead in 27 minutes only for the Turds to be back at 3-2 after 35 minutes and to level things up on the hour. Steaua's Tomas Stabile had the final say, however, quickly restoring his side's lead and setting up Till Maier to complete a 5-3 win. It was quite a day for Stabile who scored twice and contributed two assists. Steaua supporters responded only with sarcastic applause, all too aware that he'd done bugger all in the season hitherto. The Turds, top after collecting ten points from their first four games, finish with ten defeats on the spin and a second successive relegation. I could crack a very obvious gag about their contribution, but I won't.

                                  Division 2

                                  There was a straight fight for the final promotion spot at The Enormodome, and a 2nd-minute goal from Jonte Malmsborg for 3rd-placed Athletico Deva against 4th-placed The Gang Play Football tipped the balance very much in Deva's favour, as they needed only to draw to go up. For the next hour, though, The Gang played all the football, deservedly drawing level through Valeriu Ganea. They were unable to find the vital second goal, however, with Deva belatedly composing themselves to see out the game and take the point they needed. At the other end, FC Gloryhammer visited Cods of War needing a win to move out of the relegation places at their hosts' expense. And the Glory duly got themselves out of the hole, putting in a dominant performance that, thanks to Teofilo Perales' 80th-minute goal, brought them the victory they required. It is relegation, then, for the square-meal squadron, who must have thought they were safe when Phillip Hibbitt found the net on 77 minutes - alas, the goal was ruled out and the Hammer blow came soon after.

                                  Elsewhere, it was wall-to-wall dead rubbers and there were no positional changes. Eriskay Expression rounded off their championship season in style with a 6-0 demolition of relegated New Dresden, who were conspicuously short of players and motivation. Terrance Henderson was, of course, on the scoresheet for Eriskay, moving him alongside Tommy McConville and the aforementioned Swine Cristofao Edlison at the top of the league's scorers list. McConville's Great Northern Railway side were beaten 2-1 at Heffron Hendecagon - the sides finish 2nd and 5th respectively. Like the Turds in the division above, bottom-of-the-table Eintracht Midwest ended the season with ten defeats on the spin, the final one a 2-0 reverse at home to die Ambosse, who come in 6th.

                                  Division 3
                                  Needing a win at home to Wharfedale Generals to secure the title, OWC Albion did the business, although the outcome remained in the balance until two goals in the final ten minutes wrapped up a 3-0 success. In fact, a draw would have been enough for them as Brian Munchingflapjack went down 3-1 at Tree Hill High, where the home side's captain Russ Mason enhanced his standing with a hat-trick to take his team above the Flapjacks into the runners-up position. Nieuwegein Kneebiters rounded off a promising campaign with a 2-0 victory at Veni Vici Vigata that sees them finish 5th, behind the already-on-hols Wednesday de la Zouch only on goal difference and just two points short of the top three. VVV end the season in 7th. Just above them are Littlewoods Legends, who wound up their campaign with a 3-1 home win over Pinewood Passers. Four wins from their final six games suggests the Legends may be contenders next season. The future looks less bright for the Passers, who amassed just three points over the course of the season and finish seven points adrift of the Generals.

                                  And that's it for Season 60. Thanks for continuing to read these ramblings and for the many kind comments, which are always greatly appreciated. The league currently appears to be in rude health, with no inactive teams and some new boys in Andromache FC bringing us back up to 40. See you all back here next season.


                                    Thanks Hot Orange, do we know who the manager of Andromache FC is?


                                      Originally posted by Antepli Ejderha View Post
                                      Thanks Hot Orange, do we know who the manager of Andromache FC is?
                                      Don't recognise the name, but a couple of press releases already bodes well.


                                        Originally posted by Hot Orange View Post

                                        Don't recognise the name, but a couple of press releases already bodes well.
                                        I'm hoping it's an OFTer and not someone like Scultura.


                                          Just looking through some of the Team stats for the upcoming new Human League campaign, and was shocked to see that across all divisions, that my Hazers are somehow the second most valuable squad in the league, but first (Ankh-Morpork) and third (Zeugma) are also in Division 2. All of us have an average age of 24 or less, which probably explains that.

                                          And to further compound the difficulty of the division, FC Zidane are statistically the joint second strongest squad in all divisions (with Ankh-Morpork sixth).

                                          I'm taking a leap in the dark that those two clubs will probably occupy the top two spots (assuming attentive management), and there appear to be two clubs who are in full rebuild mode – leaving third to eighth left to fight for for everyone else. I'm hoping the Hazers will have enough to avoid yo-yo-ing back down again.


                                            Originally posted by MortalJoe View Post
                                            There will be a OTF Derby in the Golden League in the first round of the Cup. Dublin City FC are hosting Violett-Weiss 1919, which are managed from _DRC, who is the manager of Wharfedale Generals. We won't stand a chance but that is okay, because we are in development mode and are far from competitive mode.
                                            Good to see _DRC still at Violet-Weiss. Sylkies Horizon if I remember correctly.


                                              Hot Orange excellent final round-up, thanks.


                                                I am not looking forward to the new season in the MLX. I wanted to buy new goalkeeper, a bit younger than Ted Le Great, who is 39 and a bit of a problem for the age of the defence. I tried to buy a 29-year-old and a 28-year-old and got outbid. then I tried a 21-year-old goalie with 9 skills. And I got him. And when he arrived he turned out to be a capable midfielder.... So I am stuck with my 18/4 goalie...


                                                  So you searched for the wrong position by mistake?


                                                    Originally posted by Sits View Post
                                                    So you searched for the wrong position by mistake?
                                                    If I had a nickel for every time I've done that...