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X11 season 45 - de rigueur Mortis

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    Originally posted by Various Artist View Post
    Mandy Lyfebohtz-Quick
    Applause

    Comment


      You wouldn't believe how long it took me to come up with a second half to that surname.

      I'm not even kidding, I had 'Mandy Lifeboats' sitting on my longlist of Future Sandringham Park Player Names for literally about two years before it finally occurred to me how I could double-barrel it.

      (She was just under her best friend 'Maisie Dribble', who joined the list at the same time but whose name I still haven't managed it for...)

      Comment


        Originally posted by nmrfox View Post
        Penny Black
        Actually, how did I not think of a Penny Black-Stamp or similar? That's one that got away.

        If you'd like to bring Maisie Dribble in through the Framleyshire footballing factory instead Foxy, you're very welcome!

        Comment


          How good is the competition in the OTF league this season, by the way? With three games to go including this evening's imminent ones:

          Div 2 – 4 points between the top 3
          OTF – 3 points between the top 4 (!!)
          Div 1 – 2 points between the top 5 (!!!)

          Comment


            I liked it better last season.

            Comment


              Originally posted by Wouter D View Post
              I liked it better last season.
              Why did you go for the firesale and certain relegation Wouter? You didn't seem in any danger before that.

              Comment


                How about Hampton-Court Maisie-Dribble? Too long I imagine?

                Comment


                  Originally posted by Antepli Ejderha View Post

                  Why did you go for the firesale and certain relegation Wouter? You didn't seem in any danger before that.
                  Well, we would very likely have stayed up this season and possibly the next, but that would leave us sitting on a ticking time bomb. The core of the team was becoming far too old to win anything anymore, and floating around midtable just for old time's sake doesn't do much for me. Basically, our title push squandered all talent we have between the age of 21 and 25 (setting them steps back on the desired skill path), which meant that I could either take decisive action now or wait to see it all fall apart organically in two seasons' time.

                  I have no regrets. Nieuwegein Kneebiters have finally won a title. A subsequent nosedive is worth it.

                  Comment


                    I think the Dragons did something similar and look at them now. Makes a lot of sense Wouter.

                    I think I'm in a similar position with some excellent but ageing players, I'll see what the change report brings but I'm going to have to make some decisions.

                    Comment


                      Yeah, though we didn't do it mid season.

                      Comment


                        If the Kneebiters do go down, that will see the defending champions relegated in consecutive seasons, will it not?

                        Interesting to see Holkham being tipped to challenge next season. I'm not convinced. After losing the first two games, we had a good season in Division 1, but we were hardly sweeping teams aside - virtually every game was a close affair. The CR was OK, aside from Eva Chapman, who graduated from the academy in Season 1, deciding to call it a day after Season 20. The sustained period of dominance I was convinced we would have with a team built around her never really materialised. With Ana Maria Fogueira now looking for a pub to run, Chapman is the last of our Season 1 champions to still be at the club. It would have been useful if she could have stuck around a bit longer.

                        Comment


                          Might be something to do with you being top of the richest teams list, top of the strongest teams list, and third (and only pennies off second) in the squad value list for the top division!

                          Comment


                            I'm a rotten manager, though.

                            Comment


                              True, you only come 7th out of 10 for best coach, but as my presence in 8th place shows, that's no bar to winning stuff.

                              Comment


                                Slightly slow to arrive (see comments passim about being on holiday, it’s the official Ladies League Cup, Season 57, Round 3 report.


                                Code:
                                Csiki Girls             1 - 1   JŚlejentene
                                Neaves 37'                      Nilsen 54'
                                
                                JŚlejentene             2 - 0   Csiki Girls
                                Watne 21'
                                Murdvee 79
                                
                                JŚlejentene win 3-1 on aggregate
                                
                                
                                Gastele                 1 - 0   Legend TK
                                Dickson 38'
                                                                Klara (sent off) 49'
                                
                                Legend TK               2 - 2   Gastele
                                Rayner 62'                      Diarra 65'
                                Keller 73'                      Rosey Dickson (pen) 87'
                                
                                Gastele win 3-2 on aggregate
                                
                                
                                Southwesthampton        0 - 0   Coxy Ladies Wulpen
                                
                                Coxy Ladies Wulpen      1 - 1   Southwesthampton
                                Wostijn 22'                     Cristo 65'
                                
                                1-1 on aggregate. Southwesthampton win on away goals rule.
                                
                                
                                Tangerine FC            1 - 3   Viking South Utsira
                                Medarevic 52'                   T.Kvalvik 58'
                                                                L.Hovland 61'
                                                                T.Klovning 92'
                                
                                Viking South Utsira     3 - 3   Tangerine FC
                                N.Austrheim 5'                  Isakovic 62'
                                A.Hovland 32'                   Bare 71'
                                E.Klovning 85'                  Milanovic 73'
                                
                                Viking win 6-4 on aggregate
                                
                                
                                Twin Peaks Owls         0 - 1   Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC
                                                                Dalmiya 40'
                                                                Pitoyo (sent off) 82'
                                
                                Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC  1 - 2   Twin Peaks Owls
                                Ikmal 105'              A.E.T.  Noel 56'
                                                                Walseth 116'
                                
                                2-2 on aggregate. Twin Peaks win 4-2 on penalties.
                                Round 3 presented Csiki Girls with a challenge as they tried to punch up three tiers against Division 2 outfit JŚlejentene.
                                The first half of the opening leg at A kertem was all the Csiki’s though. However Ad Hoc’s side were being denied by a strong performance from the JŚlejentene goalkeeper Yeates… until she was injured in the 34th minute. As the only goalie at the club her replacement was a defender, who was beaten within three minutes when Robin Neaves headed home.
                                Things looked promising for Csiki Girls at half-time, only for JŚlejentene to step things up after the break, deciding they had to attack as defending risked conceding again. The visitors were rewarded with an equaliser on 54 minutes. And that was how things ended.
                                It was touch and go whether Yeates would be recovered in time for the return leg, but there she was between the sticks for the hosts. As it turned out she didn’t have much to do, which wasn’t the case for Csiki’s ‘keeper Emma Laude. Laude was nearly up to the challenge, conceding in the 21st minute but then not doing so again on the 79th. That kept her team in it up until that point, but in truth JŚlejentene deserved to progress overall.

                                The same gap in reverse was present as Gastele took on Division 5 side Legend TK.
                                Despite the league positions Gastele were the lower seeds, so at home for the opening leg. They had the better of possession in the opening half, but only created a single chance from it, the same as their foes. When Rosey Dickson took aim from range in the 38th minute however, she arrowed it home whilst Legend TK did not score with their sole shot.
                                The opportunity grew for Jdsx’s side after the break when Legend’s Runda Klara talked her way into a straight red card just four minutes into the period. Gastele then dominated the rest of the match, only for the second goal to frustratingly fail to arrive. Still a lead and no away goal conceded wa a good basis for the return leg.
                                The first hour of that passed goallessly, but not chancelessly. Not entirely good news for Gastele as their lead was slender. And in fact gone when Legend took the lead for the night in the 62nd minute. However now the advantage of no away goal conceded in the opening leg came to the fore as when Odette Diarra replied three minutes later that was effectively worth double; not only were Gastele now 2-1 up on aggregate, a 2-2 draw overall also sent them through.
                                Soon enough 2-2 was indeed the score, Legend striking on 73 minutes. Nerves frayed in the remaining time up until Hugh Cango pointed to the spot in the 87th minute and Rosey Dickson tucked it away to give Gastele a greater-than-a-goal cushion for the dregs of times and progression to a Round 4 meeting with Division 4m outfit CD Pinhalnovense. The second leg will be at The Lemon Grove.


                                Two Division 4 sides clashed when Coxy Ladies Wulpen took on Southwesthampton.
                                After a chanceless opening half, the first leg at the South Marys Stadium opened up, mostly in Coxy Ladies favour. The Waders were having more of the ball, and nearly all the chances, four to one. Unfortunately for Janik’s side the only time they got the ball into the net, Noťmie Kerckhoeven’s strike on 74 minutes, the ‘goal’ was disallowed. It leaves the tie delicately poised ahead of the return in Flanders.
                                This proved to be another very tight match. There was just one chance in the entire first half which came midway through, Aurelie Wostijn converting it to put The Waders ahead. Unfortauntely for the hosts they suffered a blow alter in the period when first choice ‘keeper Sarah Asselman suffered a 14-day injury. Reserve Elena Mehedintanu is no mug, but it was still a blow to lose Asselman in her current form.
                                That setback was compounded midway through the second period when Mehedintanu was beaten on the only shot she faced. Once again this was the solitary chance of the half, meaning Southwesthampton took the tie on away goals and Coxy Ladies minds flitted back to the draw that could and should have been an away win in the opening leg.

                                Fourth tier took on fifth when Viking South Utsira faced up to Division 4 side Tangerine FC [Division 4 = fifth tier of course, as there is a Xpert Women’s League at the apex and Division 1 at the second step, etc].
                                For nearly an hour it looked like Tangerine would build a lead to take to the North Sea. They could count themselves highly unlucky not to have been ahead at the interval after having four shots to The Blood Eagles zero in the opening period, but did get their overdue lead on 52 minutes. However, very much against the run of play, Viking levelled with a 58th minute breakaway finished by Tove Kvalvik and then went ahead three minutes later through a Lina Hovland direct free-kick.
                                With two away goals to their names Velvet Android’s side were now in a good position and Tangerine a poor one. Forced to attack, the hosts left holes at the back and were punished for it in stoppage time when Tyra Klovning reacted sharpest to stab home a corner to complete a rather fortuitous victory.
                                Two up with the home leg against a side from the Division below to play and three away goals in their collective pockets. Sounds comfortable? It certainly looked that way when Nina Austrheim fired home after 5 minutes and Anneke Hovland headed in a corner on 32 to have Viking 5-1 up overall. Particularly as VSU had had two-thirds of the possession.
                                It was still a four goal gap on the hour, so few batted an eyelid when Tangerine pulled one back soon after. However people began to shift in their seats pretty uncomfortably when the visitors struck twice more in the 71st and 73rd minutes to go 3-2 up on the night. Now the score was 5-4 overall and just as importantly the away goals account had been drained. One more for the visitors and it would be them going through on the breaker!
                                There was to be one more strike. It came on 85 minutes… and saw Utsira sub Emilie Klovning crash home from 30 yards. A spectacular goal to finally end a spectacular tie, with probably the right winners overall but also a fair scoreline that showed how hard The Blood Eagles were pushed. VA will be hoping things are more straightforward in the next round against Division 5:29 side WFC Rakhat Almaty. Ragnar Rock hosts the second leg once again.

                                Comment


                                  A clash not just within a tier, but within a Division pitted Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC against Twin Peaks Owls.
                                  The first leg at The Black Lodge was the first meeting of four that the sides will have within a month. They will be thoroughly sick of the sight of each other by the end of that. But everything was relatively fresh and unusual for this one in what proved to be a pretty tight encounter.
                                  The two halves expressed this in different ways. The opening period was nearly chanceless, The Sea Spirits having the only sight of goal, whereas after the break the teams trading openings. The only goal of the game was that first half opportunity though, Diksha Dalmiya heading home a 40th minute corner; the eight second half chances, four a piece, all went unconverted. And that despite SeanoftheShed’s side playing the last few minutes with 10 players after defender Andrin Pitoyo picked up the first red card of her career for two bookings.
                                  Things were back to being tight for the return at Merapi-Kraton-South Sea. Just one chance in the first half, and only a handful in the second. Frustratingly for Sea Spirits fans, Twin Peaks converted one of them to take the tie to extra time.
                                  The first period of that was in its dying seconds when a through pass from Tyan Borot sprung the Owls defence and set Rahma Ikmal free to score. It’s very rare on X11 to get more than one goal in extra-time, and even rarer for both sides to score. This, though, was one of those exceptions as Twin Peaks got the winner on the night they probably merited after 116 minutes.
                                  Under UEFA regulations this would have meant the visitors won on away goals, but it appears on X11 this rule only applies at the end of normal time. Who knew? So it was penalties to decide it instead. Maybe Dalmiya was a bit confused about whether the shoot-out should be happening, and that explains her opening miss. Utami Sangaji put away the second, but another miss from Thao-Ap Luangpruksachat put The Sea Goddesses on the brink. Taking first AdŤle Pailloux had a chance to bring the score back to 3-2, but a fourth conversion from four from The Owls saw them victorious in the shoot-out and progressing.


                                  Round 4 draw - first listed teams home in opening leg
                                  Code:
                                  CD Pinhalnovense (4m)        vs   Gastele
                                  WFC Rakhat Almaty (5:29)     vs   Viking South Utsira

                                  Comment


                                    I can feel the crushing inevitability of Dragons 0-0 Swine , Mortis 5-0 Ferrets already.

                                    Comment


                                      X11 Ladies Season 57 Matchday 6 report. And I’ve just clocked Nmrfox is back again, so including a general update from our Framley reporter as well.


                                      Code:
                                      Division 2b
                                      
                                      Chelsea Ladies FC       0 - 1   Drakaina
                                                                      Sandrine Petit 91'
                                      
                                      Gastele                 2 - 0   Fembots
                                      Perdao 50'
                                      Dickson 86'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 3e
                                      
                                      St.Hallvards IF         0 - 2   Viking South Utsira
                                                                      B.Austrheim 6'
                                                                      B.Kvalvik
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 4i
                                      
                                      Coxy Ladies Wulpen      3 - 1   Spacecowgirls
                                      Gerniers 26', 93'               Sinton 36'
                                      Wostijn (pen) 61'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 5:16
                                      
                                      LNWR Locomotive         0 - 0   Slytherin LFC
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 5:19
                                      
                                      Ullapool Northern Star  1 - 3   ŽFK Partizan Beograd
                                      Barkho 88'                      Mškelš 45'
                                                                      Rico 75'
                                                                      Milovanovic 86'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 5:21
                                      
                                      Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC  2 - 1   Twin Peaks Owls
                                      Dalmiya 10'                     Richardson 70'
                                      Ikmal 90'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 5:32
                                      
                                      Csiki Girls             2 - 1   Guerreras del Amanecer
                                      Woozley 46'                     Schwarz 52'
                                      Ackland 71'
                                      Smet (sent off) 88'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 6:43
                                      
                                      Hazeldean Inchmistress  6 - 0   Los Angeles Galaxy
                                      Saraiva 1'
                                      GolkŠs 9', 22'
                                      Bunton 16'
                                      Christersson 19'
                                      Barnes 32'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 6:53
                                      
                                      Aperta com Elas FC      1 - 1   Zeugma Dostluk Spor
                                      Cacťm 23'                       Bell 20'
                                      
                                      
                                      Division 6:56
                                      
                                      Tellusdam               0 - 2   Menywod Maeshafn
                                                                      Sanderson 4'
                                                                      Westerberg 76'
                                      Division 2b leaders Drakaina visited a famous name in Women’s Football dressed in unfamiliar garb when they took on Chelsea Ladies FC.
                                      There are a number of reasons to think the Chelsea manager may not be too bothered about his real life side having signed arguably the world’s best player (i.e. he is a sexist prat), which made support for The Dragons in this one even easier than it ordinarily would have been. Fortunately for those feeling that way Etienne’s side delivered a winning performance. But nearly not a winning result, as it took until the 91st minute before Sandrine Petit fired in a corner for the games’ only goal.
                                      Rapidly improving Gastele were looking to continue their upward trend against Fembots.
                                      Jdsx set his side up to play a defensive counter-punching game, which worked to perfection. Gastele had less than 50% of the ball in both halves, but also the overwhelming majority of the chances. The visitors ‘keeper put in an exceptional showing to stand firm to the hosts three first half openings, but she was eventually overwhelmed and unable to stop Fernanda Perdao heading the Gastele ahead on 50 minutes.
                                      Chances continued to come after that, with a second goal arriving (rather overdue if we are honest) on 86 minutes, Rosey Dickson racing clear and sliding home. It was a win that lifted Gastele out of the relegation zone and up to fourth in the 2b table. They are now nearly as close to second (three points ahead) as they are sixth (two points behind). Drakaina remain top, their five wins from six having them three points clear of second.

                                      After a fairly frenetic and heart-stopping cup-tie where his side nearly blew a 5-1 aggregate lead, Viking South Utsira boss Velvet Android would have been hoping for a return to normality when The Blood Eagles travelled to St.Hallvards IF for a league game.
                                      The visitors were still in explosive mode though, at least for the opening few minutes as they rushed into the lead when Birgit Austrheim lobbed the ‘keeper from the halfway line in the 6th minute. As that was unmatchable things did calm down rather, the rest of the half passing with no goals and few chances.
                                      Bergljot Kvalvik headed home a corner in the opening minutes of the second half to make it 2-0, and at that point Viking shut up shop in a much more effective manner than a few days previously; Hallvards only had one more sight of goal all match!
                                      The win lifted Viking up to second in the Division 3e table, though a fair distance (five points) adrift of the leaders.

                                      The Cup was also on the mind of Coxy Ladies Wulpen as they looked to bounce back from a disappointing exit by putting one over bottom-of-the-table Spacecowgirls.
                                      The Waders had 60% of first half possession and looked well on course for a comfortable win when Sandrine Gerniers put them ahead from a direct free-kick on 26 minutes. But ten minutes later they suffered a setback as Spacecowgirls equalised rather against the run of play.
                                      Janik’s team were in decent form though, and kept plugging away. They were rewarded twice in the second half, both times with a helping hand from referee Michael Steen. First, just past the hour mark, he awarded a somewhat dodgy penalty (the Wulpen view, the opposition may have used fruitier language) which Aurelie Wostijn converted and then in stoppage time he gave another free-kick in shooting range from which Gerniers finally sealed the win.
                                      The away fans left chanting “3-1 to the referee”, whilst Coxy Ladies supporters shrugged and looked up a Division 4i table that now shows their side in third, only goal difference outside the play-offs.

                                      A first league win in round five had moved LNWR Locomotive out of the Division 5:16 relegation zone by dint of pushing them just past Slytherin LFC. Which was exactly who The Steamers played next in an attempt to consolidate their new position.
                                      The game would prove to be one of few incidents. In fact the only memorable aspect of it was a negative one, Locomotive’s Beata RŲnnberg picking up an 8-day injury. On the positive stats, Viktor Boskovic’s side shaded the number of chances and were shaded on possession. But the only one that really counts, goals, was blank for both teams.
                                      That was enough to keep LNWR ahead of their direct opponents. And also the bottom two, neither of whom won. The Steamers stay fifth, out of the drop zone on a goal difference that is one less negative than Slytherin’s.

                                      The league table would have told you that Ullapool Northern Star were strong favourites against winless ŽFK Partizan Beograd. However these things can sometimes be misleading, for example with the Serbians who are a rather better team than their record would have one believe.
                                      Despite this Northern Star had the better of the first half. But they did so without scoring, and that would prove to be a costly error for delicatemoth’s side as Beograd went ahead very much against the run of play on the stroke of half-time.
                                      Having gone ahead the visitors were in no mood to let go, adding two more after the break. The third was swiftly followed by one back, Zebela Barkho finishing off coolly, but as that came with 88 on the clock it was only ever a consolation strike.
                                      Ullapool stay fourth in Division 5:19 despite the loss, but now rather than being two points off the play-offs they are three points ahead of the drop zone.

                                      Match number three of the series between Kanjeng Ratu Kidul WFC and Twin Peaks Owls was The Sea Spirits home league game.
                                      The two had met at the same venue just three days before in the Cup, which had proved a disappointment for Kanjeng as they lost at home on penalties. Twin Peaks opted to remain in Indonesia to train between the fixtures, but even so they still looked jaded early on and fell behind in the 10th minute to a Diksha Dalmiya header.
                                      SeanoftheShed’s side’s hold on the match lessened after the break, the Owls taking advantage to equalise on 70 minutes. But lessened doesn’t mean disappeared completely and in the 90th minute the hosts got the winning goal they just about deserved and did so in spectacular style, Rahma Ikmal fizzing the ball home from 30 yards.
                                      The win not only kept The Sea Goddesses top of Division 5:21, it increased the security of their top two place as Twin Peaks had started (and indeed finished) the day third in the table.

                                      Second against third, Csiki Girls vs Guerreras del Amanecer, with just a point between the two at the start of play (in Csiki Girls favour).
                                      The two didn’t seem particularly evenly matched on the pitch though as ad hoc’s side dominated proceedings. Yes, they didn’t score in the first half, but the 60+% possession was tiring Amanecer out. The goal wasn’t long coming after the break, Trudy Woozley firing in directly from a free-kick seconds after the restart.
                                      The Csiki’s continued to be on top, only to receive a shock when Guerreras equalised out-of-the-blue on 52 minutes. It felt like a matter of time until a winner for the hosts though, and that is exactly what transpired, Norma Ackland turning in a corner after 71 minutes. The match ended with the Transylvanians down to 10 after Floriane Smet picked up her second yellow card of the afternoon on 88 minutes, but there was not enough time for this to do any serious damage.
                                      Victory was extra sweet as new filtered through that Division 5:32 leaders Queens in Uniforms had been held to a draw, which allowed Csiki Girls to take back over at the top of the table.

                                      Comment


                                        And welcome to Hazeldean Inchmistress, who Foxy265 has been in charge of since near the back end of last season, something that I had somehow not clocked. Our first visit to Kofi Annan Avenue was a promising one as visitors Los Angeles Galaxy were managerless.
                                        This was something Inchmistress were going to make the most of. Indeed they were a goal up inside 60 seconds, Musa Saraiva heading home and five clear by the midway point of the first half. Half of goals two to five were netted by skipper Kaila GolkŠs, the other two coming from Karen Bunton and GŲta Christersson. Bunton’s goal was the first of the 17 year-old’s career.
                                        Kelli Barnes added a sixth for Hazeldean just after the half-hour, at which point the home players knocked off for the day, job already well done. The Framleyshire girls had begun the day third in the Division 6:43 table, but ended it second after the side just ahead of them were held to a draw.

                                        A top of the table clash was the big game of the day in Division 6:53 as leaders Zeugma Dostluk Spor took on second-placed side Aperta com Elas FC.
                                        The leaders were first to strike, Stacey Bell putting Antepli Ejderha’s charges ahead when she headed in in the 20th minute. It didn’t take long for Aperta to level though. And after they did… nothing. The game rather petered out up until a disallowed goal for home side Aperta in second-half stoppage time.
                                        The draw kept Zeugma top of the tree in 6:53, a point ahead of the side they faced in this one and three points clear of third-place.

                                        Menywod Maeshafn took their perfect record in the league to lower mid-table side Tellusdam.
                                        The game was under four minutes old when the opening game was scored. It was a surprise scorer, defender Mallory Sanderson heading home the first goal of her career in just her second ever senior appearance. She was joined on the scoresheet two-thirds of the way through the second half by a player at the very other end of her career, 37 year old centre-forward Ada Westerberg heading home the clincher on 76 minute. As befits their status as zombies, Tellusdam barely had a shot in the match.
                                        Victory made it six out of six for IsThatcherDeadYet’s side, who stay top of Division 6:56, three points ahead of Iron empress and six clear of third-in the table Danis Ladies.

                                        Comment


                                          Originally posted by Etienne View Post
                                          I can feel the crushing inevitability of Dragons 0-0 Swine , Mortis 5-0 Ferrets already.
                                          I can’t win can I? Well I can’t win anyway, but you know what I mean.

                                          Comment


                                            You can win by maximising your DV I reckon.

                                            Comment


                                              Onceonahill has resigned as manager of Kaikoura Duskies (formerly Steaua). I've messaged Jon to see if he's interested in a glorious return.

                                              Comment


                                                Originally posted by Etienne View Post
                                                I can feel the crushing inevitability of Dragons 0-0 Swine , Mortis 5-0 Ferrets already.
                                                I notice VA has an outside shot of two titles in a week, as Royal Atlantis could still pinch the Heineken League championship from under Sean's nose.

                                                Comment


                                                  I'm also in the same position in the Heineken League as OTF, leading by two points and a handful of goals with one game to play to get promotion from Division 2.

                                                  Comment


                                                    More or less me too. Third place in the Heineken Div 1, 2 points clear of 4th with one game to play. First in OTF Div 1, 3 points clear of 4th with one game to play. Difference is that because 3rd and 4th play each other in the last round in the OTF league I can't fail to go up, whereas I can very definitely fail to go up in the Heineken (goal diff is against me too, so a draw will likely not be enough)

                                                    Comment

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