Matt J's "Word Racing" timewaster/game for the stay-at-home COVID-19 days of 2020

[ad hoc]

Bills onion blini

(accidentally an invoice is sent to a non-orthodox Russian pancake)

[Various Artist]

These more esoteric contexts are turning this thread into something resembling the crossword one.

3 across: Petitioning the highest level of the force? (12)
10 across: Frontman is feeling particularly modernist today (7)
12 down: Accidentally an invoice is sent to a non-orthodox Russian pancake (4,2,6)

[Diable Rouge]

Fling brown bling (because gold jewellery is, frankly, passé).

[Vicarious Thrillseeker]

balls spoil bible

[matt j]

Race entries close like 6-7 hours from now, results after that.

[matt j]

Race #12 results:

Going a linear path from one place, let's artificially call it 'the start' to another place, let's say "the finish", should theoretically be an easy, non-complicated task. To add a small layer of difficulty, to judge a group of these travelers, let's call them 'racers', as to who and when finishes first, again should be simple. One would say.

So for the sake of this report, I will classify the racers into three categories. First, "The good":

Overall, the resurgent, the previously triumphant, the ad hoc team, left nothing behind in the locker room and stormed to both an early and a late lead. The others were left wondering where in Russian delicacies they'd gone wrong. A dominant performance.

Closer, in relative terms, the relative newcomer Balderdasha put the screws into the old hands of word racing. We would not say that new money and extravagant spending on the word racing transfer market had anything to do with the 'dasha's success, but we won't say it didn't.

The "D", the horned one, and the notorious VTS, all turned in what can be described as above-average-to-the-point-of-being-good-but-not-as-good-as-somebody-else performances. The very echo of, say, a Nathaniel Clyne at Liverpool, or a Joe Niekro at his family gatherings. Yes, their flying, rattling motor vehicles did indeed find a way to traverse from a to b. They did, just not 'that' well'.

We would be remiss if we did not include last week's leader lambers in this category, who started quite brightly, but faded like the dawn star seen from a collapsing parapet in the old marsh keep of a forgotten earl.

Second, "The bad":

Sits, too, Trojan Records legend Various Artist, and the colloquially recognized 'of the' all performed meh. Their meh-ness was exemplary however. Various Artist themselves perfected the meh-ness completely in their first leg. A true perfection of the genre.

Third, "the Eli Wallach":

The talked when they should have shot. Down deep in the pits, truly the weakest of the entries, the dismal, the doldrums, the depth of despair. The other end of the ad hoc's team see-saw: Hey that might be Zeb, nmrfox, and Sporting, around the house. Each turned in what can only be described as 'not-up-to-snuff' sentences.

We must, because we must, single-out Sporting for a truly unique and memorable experience, the first ever leg of a word racing race in international competition to rate only 1 star out of 5. Eat your heart out Halle Berry, a challenger for bombs approaches.

[matt j]

Team/User	Place Race #12	Points Race #12
ad hoc	1	32
Balderdasha	2	30
diable rouge	3	28
Wouter D	4	26
Vicarious Thillseeker	5	24
lambers	6	22
sits	7	20
Various Artist	8	18
Sean of the Sead	9	16
slackster	10	14
elguapo04	11	12
delicatemoth	12	10
San Bernardhinault	13	8
Sporting	14	6
nmrfox	15	4
Southport Zeb	16	2

[matt j]

Race #13, the Arnold Palmer:

You want to score low. low-low-low. Low Rider. Jurgi Low. Sid Low. Leopold and Low.

Clue:
Had a great performance from Tim Curry. This has nothing to do with the race, it's just true.

[Sporting]

Eerie tarts scare (dad makes apple tarts in the shape of coffins for his kids thus frightening them sick with nightmares)

[Southport Zeb]

Hexes never sleep

[Balderdasha]

Boils noisy billy

(Fed up with the bleating of next door's goat, a neighbour opts for the Glenn Close solution).

[Vicarious Thrillseeker]

Foxes worry weeds

[nmrfox]

Baker bakes bread

[ad hoc]

Retro otter teeth

[San Bernardhinault]

Chump cooks beets.

[Various Artist]

Wow, I appear to be stunningly 'meh'. So proud. On that note:

Might tread water

[slackster]

Overt rower error (a couple of rooky air strokes blows the oarsman’s race)

[Sean of the Shed]

Tasty wrens liver

[Wouter D]

Sweet steak sauce

[elguapo4]

Sells stale candy, shopkeeper covers up best before dates on the sweet counter .

[Diable Rouge]

Stoke fiery blaze (with the poker, said he).

[lambers]

UTTER QUIET SOUND!

[Sits]

Wheel treat troth

A rare engagement ceremony in which the groom-to-be gifts his beloved a set of bicycle wheels. Clearly.

[matt j]

Race closes sometime in 6-7 hours. I think we already have 15 entries, so maybe only one regular missing at this point.

[matt j]

A surprisingly culinary set of entries. Caught everyone in a peckish mood eh?

andrew7610 only one missing, I think.