Quick goals

[jwdd27]

Julian Broddle after about 10 seconds for Scunthorpe v Halifax in 1986. We got a second inside 2 minutes, so it was all set up for a proper trouncing, but it finished 2-1 and was quite a dull match. It was a Sunday kick off experiment, but the internet tells me I was one of only 2059 in attendance, so it didn't boost the numbers much, and as I recall Sunday games in those days were subdued affairs as it was quite difficult to get a drink on the Sabbath.

Broddle later became a copper in Manchester, and hit the headlines as "hero policeman" (saved drowning man or similar); and "disgraced policeman" (sacked for cocaine abuse).

[Jah Womble]

My lot mightn't have won much in the way of trophies in recent years, but we can at least claim two of the fastest goals in Premier League 'history': Ledley King (9/12/2000, vs Bradford City) - 9.9 seconds; Christian Eriksen (31/1/2018, vs Man Utd) - 10.8 seconds.

[1974ddr]

1991 Villa 3 Forest 1.
Shaun Teale scored the Forest goal inside thirty seconds, and did so from an impossible position practically on the goal line, about ten yards to the left of the goal in front of the Holte End, by hooking an attempted clearance back over his head and over the keeper (Nigel Spink, I think). To be fair to Big Nige- if indeed it was him- I don't think he was expecting it.

[Patrick Thistle]

Yes I did. That's still Shrewsbury's record fastest goal I think.

[Giggler]

4 touches and 10 seconds, yesterday

Matthew Snoddy scores after only 10 seconds for Irish Premiership champions Crusaders against Glentoran. - https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/av/football/45851409

Did you see O’Neill Donaldson score against Bury inside 10 seconds in September 1993? I did.

[Toby Gymshorts]

One of our Sunday League games was once called off as our opponents couldn't raise a team, so we hung around to watch another game. It's the only time I've seen a goal scored straight from kick off, and it only went in because the keeper was putting his fag out on the post.

[elguapo4]

Glenn Crowe for Bohs against UCD in 2001, about 6 seconds, certainly less than 10.

[Billy Casper]

Ricardo Vaz Te. Barnsley v Crystal Palace. 9 seconds.

[Southport Zeb]

I think the two fastest goals I've seen were both own goals - one at Shelbourne eleven or twelve years ago and another at Alton this April. Neither can have been more than ten seconds into the game.

[jameswba]

The fastest one I've ever witnessed was by Keith O'Neill, for Norwich against Stoke in 1997. That took 12 seconds. I doubt I'll ever see a quicker one.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

No, and was it 1993? Course it was, Rogin, you eejit. No, I just meant this thread was likely to spawn loads of similar brilliant examples but that one was bound to be among the most obvious.

[Various Artist]

The Klaxon answer to this among England fans of a certain age is the one San Marino scored after 8 seconds against us in 1991.

Forgive me if I'm being dense here, but what was 'klaxon-worthy' (presumably in a QI sense) about this answer – other than the mistaken year, which I assume was a typo and not your point Rogin? Are you suggesting it somehow wasn't a quick goal?

[Jah Womble]

Ha.

Fairly exhaustive list here on Wikipedia, although a fair few seem to have been from amateur matches:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fast...ation_football

[Crystal Staples]

Does the klaxon still sound if you say it was 1993?

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

The Klaxon answer to this among England fans of a certain age is the one San Marino scored after 8 seconds against us in 1991.

[Patrick Thistle]

4 touches and 10 seconds, yesterday

Matthew Snoddy scores after only 10 seconds for Irish Premiership champions Crusaders against Glentoran. - https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/av/football/45851409