Leicester than zero? - Premier League 2018/19

[Lang Spoon]

Yeah and like St Xabi he often needs one too many touches of the ball. But I can forgive him. Def less raking crossfield passes than Alonso (though sometimes I think Xabi was just trolling the Cunt Gerrard with those pinpoint perfectly weighted pearls but)

[The Awesome Berbaslug!!!]

Alonso didn't always have good options in front of him. There was a big gulf in quality between that Liverpool team's central spine, and the wide players.

[Lang Spoon]

Liverpool are fairly pisspoor if forced to have the ball. Not getting yer man with teh trick knee from Lyon may have cost them dearly I fear. No real creativity behind the front three/two and Firmino playing behind Salah bar Power Cube. Who I love dearly, but clearly isn't enough against well drilled teams.

[Lang Spoon]

Alonso didn't always have good options in front of him. There was a big gulf in quality between that Liverpool team's central spine, and the wide players.

The gulf between the best central midfield in the world (bar Xavi/Iniesta/Busquests) and the drek on the wing (Pennant! Yossi!) was terrifying. Fuck sake Rafa. And he barely ever played Yossi in the end who at least was jinksy.

[The Awesome Berbaslug!!!]

There was that guy in the 2008-9 season, a spanish wide left player, and his entire Youtube compilation clip was a minute and a half long, and most of that was repeats of a deflected goal in a uefa cup final. He was a decent enough player, but er,

Part of the problem those players had was that liverpool's game in possession of the ball was very basic. They didn't have much of a plan for when they had the ball. You could see that they practiced defending as a unit, but pretty much left attacking up to the individual players to work out. If you were to watch a game now, and then a game from back then, I think you'd be quite shocked at what you would see. I think the first thing you'd notice is that liverpool back in 2008-9 made 512 passes per game, (Which was in the top two back then) whereas they make 630 a game now which is nearly 25% more. But also Back then they played more long passes than any other team. 73 per game, whereas now they're fifth lowest with 58. I think you'd also be shocked by how little the full backs do with the ball, and how little they link up with the wingers in possession compared to today. But Mourinho's chelsea weren't much different, and to be honest Neither Man utd under mourinho and Newcastle under benitez were very different in intent or sophistication.

[Lang Spoon]

Riera? Yeah, not a world beater. And then there was the eternal promise of Pacheco, till he turned out to be the poor man's Bojan.

The season fucking Gerrard played at right wing, Liverpool were quite good to watch then.

And a series of Moments with Gerrard behind Torres while Masch and Alonso did all the hard work behind Himself. Apart from that Liverpool were an assault on the eyes even at the time.

[Gerontophile]

Leicester are 1 up.

Newcastle have just scored with a scorcher, in off the top of the post. Fabulous hit. (Keep thinking the guy's name is Cher, but it's Schar.)

[Snake Plissken]

13th goal that Burnley have conceded these season from outside the box.

[Gerontophile]

That's some poor Burnley defending there.

Although tbf, Longstaff hit it fairly hard.

[Gerontophile]

And a sitter missed. (Centre-half?)

[Toby Gymshorts]

Yeah and like St Xabi he often needs one too many touches of the ball. But I can forgive him. Def less raking crossfield passes than Alonso (though sometimes I think Xabi was just trolling the Cunt Gerrard with those pinpoint perfectly weighted pearls but)

Xabi Alonso is a Prince and I will cut you if you disrespect him again.

Think on.

[Snake Plissken]

And a sitter missed. (Centre-half?)

Yes, Tarkowski.

We're sounding a bit leggy. Dwight McNeil (who is the brightest prospect we've had since Jay Rodriguez) has been hooked at half time.

[Toby Gymshorts]

If this stays at 2-0 it's a pleasing result for Gymshorts Snr. and, by extension, me.

[delicatemoth]

I know he is a spoofer but I am oddly pleased at the Brendan Rodgers appointment. I just find him entertaining, a quality in somewhat short supply with the previous chap. "I'll give my life to make the supporters proud of their club" - no, no, Brendan, you won't need to do that! Brendan, come down from that ledge!

Yuks aside, I think he may have one skill the club would find useful - that towering ego may be able to persuade Leicester's good young players to stay a year or two longer than they might otherwise have done by convincing them "something special" is in the offing. I do find it hard to imagine him taking us down.

[torres]

At least this'll end his teams being absolutely embarrassing in Europe.

[elguapo4]

The Manchester United singing section will be delighted that Pogba and Sanchez and Fred are starting tonight.

[Gerontophile]

Kane just 'nutted' someone. And got away with it.

[Toby Gymshorts]

You've just rescinded your Glaswegian card for calling that "nutting" someone.

(I get your point, though.)

[Gerontophile]

Take it aff me, trainer trash.

[EIM]

The Manchester United singing section will be delighted that Pogba and Sanchez and Fred are starting tonight.

You're not allowed to call the singing section the singing section, otherwise the overly-precious organisers of the singing section will ban you from the singing section. I'm unsure what they'd rather call it, perhaps the Karaoke Block, who knows. You also have to give 100% otherwise you get approached by "one of the lads" who are watching for passengers. If you're not giving 100% you are asked why, then possibly banned. The pitchside cunts don't know the meaning of the word 100%. They want to try walking up the stairs to tier 2 then walking up to row 34. Then they'll know effort.

I was meant to be there tonight, but I woke up feeling fucking rubbish. Every time I go visit my nieces and nephew I come back feeling like patient zero from a zombie film. This time, after a detailed Google, I have discovered I have what is know as 'the lurgy'. There was no way I fancied a fourteen hour round trip to Selhurst Park, so I instead spent the day in bed, only getting up to briefly play FIFA 19.

This is ideal FIFA 19 time if playing online. The hardcore gamers are busy, and instead you get to play the kids, who are allowed to play before bed having completed their homework. These 12, 13 and 14 year old idiots are too slow and dumb to work out my impeccable Phelan-ball tactics. I pull their defence out of place with quick passing, leaving them chasing players like an idiot dog chasing a tennis ball you haven't thrown yet, then slip it through to Martial, Rashford or Lingard who score.

4-0 up (Martial, Lingard, Rashford, Pogba) v Real Madrid after 65 minutes and the little cry-arse disconnected. 2-0 (Pogba x2) up after 26 minutes v France in the next game and sure enough my cowardly opponent disappears. Take your beatings, you swines! Stand up and face your destiny, you miserable cowering mutts!

I'm glad I'm not at Selhurst Park. I despise those Holmesdale Fanatics. They manage to make the singing section divs look good. All clad in their Sports Direct black gear, pretending to be Ultras because they saw the Puma Hard Chorus video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mo2wFptAX3k) and didn't realise it was a pisstake. They turned up at the Tollgate pub a season or two back to try and take it or something, I dunno, whatever they do on the Green Street or that Nick Love remake one about tracksuits. A handful of old Irish fellas in replica shirts carrying a bag of cans and some lads who got their mam to sew a Stone Island patch on their Lonsdale trackies chased them all the way to the ground. No one came out of it well, but particularly not the Holmesdale dickheads.

Anyway. What's the score?

[EIM]

I'm watching Hearts v Celtic here. I've just got tickets to the Hibs cup game at the weekend, so I'm doing my homework. Glad to see Neil Lennon is still manager. He's been there for ages now. Is Jorge Cadette on the bench?

[Toby Gymshorts]

Take it aff me, trainer trash.

Didn't have to, it crumbled into dust out of sheer embarrassment.

[Gerontophile]

0-1 (to EIM, in case someone fronts up first).

[Gerontophile]

Didn't have to, it crumbled into dust out of sheer embarrassment.

Unlike your colour blindness.

[Toby Gymshorts]

IDGI.

Anyway, in other news, Mane has scored an outrageous backheel to put Liverpool 2-0 up against Watford. It might be tempting fate, but I fucking hate Troy Deeney.