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Penned It Like Saunders

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    Penned It Like Saunders

    Probably a nil thread, but nevermind.

    Entertaining program notes or newspaper columns from players - I used to read Aki Riihilahti's very amusing website, but hadn't found much else lately until this effort from Farnborough's 21-goal midfielder Rob Saunders:

    "Apologies for the delay since my last column, I have been a busy boy. With the golfing high season now in full swing my work has stepped up and I also had a two day jolly to Paris for the England friendly last week. Whilst it was clear for all to see that the game itself was not of much quality, the banter of an away day with England can never be questioned. Enjoying a pint of Grimbergen lager syrup before lark song, welting a football around a train station, enjoying the finest of Parisian cuisine by "going grande" in McDonalds, and losing money on roulette at 1am are what following the St George are all about. A truly high brow and cultural experience.

    And of course in that 2 weeks we have had a number of games, with some highs and lows.

    Unfortunately I picked up a hamstring strain in the warm up at Uxbridge and missed the Easter programme. Sky TV would have billed the weekend a "crunch time" and that was very much what we felt in the dressing room. The feeling in that same dressing on Easter Monday at 5 o'clock was very despondent. There was a very low attendance in the Fleet Town bar by our lads and we gradually sloped off with our one point from the two games, and in fairness we were lucky to get that after the miss of the season at Uxbridge two days earlier. Clemmo called us in to train the following day but we just sat down and had a casual chat amongst ourselves, a couple of cheeky beers and put the weekend well and truly to bed.

    My injury however did allow me to head up to meet some of the sponsored walkers in the Oatsheaf in Fleet. There was a healthy turn out and it appeared as if everyone had a good day, up until kick off that was! Great credit to everyone who took part and the amount of money raised shows a fantastic effort. The fundraising target is creeping nearer so well done to Bob Perry and his crew of merry men.

    I was pleasantly surprised to pass my fitness test at Andover. Having been here since day one of pre-season, to miss the run in would have been awful. To also miss first hand the show Wheels [Darren Wheeler] put on with his four goals and all round display would have been disappointing too. We, and him in particular, were scintillating at times and 6-0 was a fair reflection of an enjoyable afternoon at a great little club. Once again results were favourable and there was a real feel good factor in the bar after the game. Great to see Harks [Paul Harkness] back in the picture, mainly as he understands adult banter and isn't shy of getting his round in either.

    Barring a mathematical miracle two wins should see us lifting the giant stingray of a shield in the late April sunshine. Whilst we know we are close to achieving our season aim we have not lost sight of the fact that we are not over the line. It would be great to win it at home to Windsor & Eton so we can have two days to remember, but it's a case of closing it out professionally and clinically.

    As you all know there is no game this week. I am sure this means a number of you will be roped into creosoting the fence, traipsing round Primark with a fishing net of cheap smalls, or if you are very unlucky, an afternoon at the mother-in-law's. The boys however have been instructed to go on a team bonding afternoon after training. "Gaffers orders darling....honest." It is very rare that I get ready for a team night out at 11am!

    This week also saw us progress in the Hants Senior Cup. Winning this trophy does mean an awful lot to us and although there was an air of training session at times we are pleased to be through. Personally speaking I have reached my target of 20 goals and finally won the bet that Clemmo and I had at Cowes IOW during pre-season.

    Just a little message for Bethany New, our own 'high street honey'. All the very best in the latter stages of the competition, you certainly have the credentials to go as far as you want.....probably Zoo or Nuts magazine. It was nice to see her in my No 7 shirt, and if she wins I am more than happy to treat her to a Harvester combo meal. I read that she likes hairy and smelly men so I haven't showered for weeks and Wooz [Dave Woozley] is donating some of his shoulder hair clippings for me to glue to my face.

    On to Gosport,"


    Penned It Like Saunders

    Hey Crusoe,

    How has Darren Wheeler been doing for your lads?


      Penned It Like Saunders

      Very well. Didn't do badly to start with and now he's possibly the first choice in the team (well, alongside Ciardini and Saunders in midfield), absolutely terrifies defences at this level. He's got 14 goals in 30 games (from the wing) including 8 in his last 11 games. I'd like to see him tied to a proper contract.


        Penned It Like Saunders

        It's fair to say that when we released him, it was one of the few occasions where it actually was mutual.

        He came on big money (for mangotsfield) and disappointed, looked disinterested and gave us very little.

        On the flip side, he didn't like the travelling and was clearly disappointed with the quality of some of our side.

        After about 3 games he stopped putting in any effort at all, which is what wrankled with the support.


          Penned It Like Saunders

          Really? That's interesting, I'd assumed he'd be a crowd favourite wherever he was.