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Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

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    Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

    Nil thread.

    Poor restriction on the number of characters we can use in a thread title too. Had to put 'The North' instead of 'The Midlands'.

    Eurosport televises a lot of beach football. Does anyone know whether any real footballers have ever taken part? ie, people we may even have once heard of?

    #2
    Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

    Eric Cantona was captain of the French beach football team for a while.

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      #3
      Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

      'Sous les pavés, la plage,' Eric would tell the squad when they complained at having to train in a car park.

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        #4
        Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

        Eric's got more caps at kicking a ball around on a beach than he got for playing on grass. Because he was pompous, and shit.

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          #5
          Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

          Benjm wrote: 'Sous les pavés, la plage,' Eric would tell the squad when they complained at having to train in a car park.
          I have this on an Eric Cantona badge.

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            #6
            Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

            Rogin the Armchair Fan wrote: Eric's got more caps at kicking a ball around on a beach than he got for playing on grass. Because he was pompous, and shit.
            Pointless trolling. His 45 caps and 20 goals are irrelevant now he's a socialist superhero. A proper one. Not a slum-landlord, property investment guru one like "Robbie" "Fowler".

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              #7
              Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

              didn't robbie fowler and steve mcmananaman play in a celebrity friendly in grozny with that nice man Ramzan Kadyrov? (along with maradona, figo, barthez, baresi, costacurta and some other cunts)

              The banter must have been fantastic

              Kadyrov: "Why did the woman cross the road?"
              Robbie & Steve: "we don't know. Why did the woman cross the road?"
              Kadyrov: "Because the pit where we bury the rape victims alive is on the other side of the road. Ah yes Banter."
              Robbie and Steve: "Top Bantz, you're such a la' Kady. That reminds us of this story that Brucie Grobelaar used to tell john barnes and mark walters about his time fighting in the rhodesian army...."

              anyway, on a lighter note Rogin.

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                #8
                Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                Evidently not "pointless trolling", then, as I got you two to stand to attention for a start.

                Okay, then, having got my nonsense out of the way, how does one view M. Cantona's beach football career? I mean he was quite the man in it, wasn't he, the game was (and probably is) very popular, and the purpose of the OP is to ask well why not?

                My answer to that, btw, would remain because everyone spent five minutes watching it once, and thought it was crap. But as ever, I'm prepared to be convinced otherwise.

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                  #9
                  Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                  Hahaha, Berba you nutter

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                    #10
                    Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                    Beach football is shite. Eric was great in it. He kicked off with some Uruguayans, then won man of the tournament and gave his prize (crates of Kronenburg) to travelling United fans who'd been supporting him. He obviously drunkenly agreed to something and ended up getting sucked in for a few years. It's fine. I've had relationships like that.

                    There was a PS2 game of it. It was amazing. Eric would score mad overhead kicks in glorious beach locations as the commentator shouted things like VOILA MADAME!

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                      #11
                      Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                      I had to google that game (can't find it) but found this

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                        #12
                        Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                        If it wasn't for beach football Brazil wouldn't have won the World Cup 5 times.

                        Well, that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

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                          #13
                          Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                          and this

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                            #14
                            Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEcKMbfJxgc

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                              #15
                              Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                              Elvis Wilbury takes a turn wrote: If it wasn't for beach football Brazil wouldn't have won the World Cup 5 times.

                              Well, that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.
                              And a lot of them would have come back in time to practice in Europe after summer holiday

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                                #16
                                Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                So Solidarnosc Crew wrote: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEcKMbfJxgc
                                The need to give that commentator more ecstasy and less valium.

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                                  #17
                                  Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                  It's pretty dull.
                                  We happened to be in Marseilles about a decade ago on a beano and Cantona was playing in a beach football thing.
                                  It was lovely sitting there in the Mediterranean heat sipping a beer. The players' feet must've been burned to cinders, it was around 40 degrees. Definitely factor 30 and hat time for us Arctic palefaces.

                                  That Cup Final Berba posted above always reminds me that halfway through the match my uncle pulled out a fucking gun and started waving it around in my gaff.

                                  Everyone did the Goodfellas 'whoooooooaaa!' thing.

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                                    #18
                                    Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                    Yeah, the beach version is pretty boring, while Futsal is not. It's (futsal) also a style where you can't just take one of the best 11-a-side, throw him in and he'll be among the best there.

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                                      #19
                                      Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                      The weird thing also about those tournaments is the mixture of international teams and club sides.
                                      You'd almost swear it was a load of contrived old cobblers sponsored by beer companies to sell, um, beer.
                                      Still, brilliant day and the 5 mile coastal road stroll back to Marseilles in the evening sun was fucking joyous.

                                      It'll never catch on here.
                                      Frostbite and radiation poisoning from Windscale puts the mockers on it somewhat.

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                                        #20
                                        Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                        Jonny Scales did a bit of the old beach football didn't he?

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                                          #21
                                          Why hasn't beach football taken off in The North?

                                          He did, aye.

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