West Ham

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

Sorry if there's already a dedicated thread, please re-direct me if so.

Seriously, WTF is going on? As a northerner I naturally loathe all London clubs, but West Ham have always been the quintessential "Cockney Wankers", more loathsomely whelk-guzzling, chippy-cheery 'ows ya fatha cor blimey guv London-ish than all the other London clubs. I note they are 4 points clear* now in a notional London mini-league. And under Sam Allardyce of all arseholes. This is kind of intriguingly bizarre but deeply wrong. When will it stop?

* edit - er, except for the Abramovich outfit, just realised.

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

West Ham

I don't know. I don't particularly hate Londoners though. I must be one of those peaceniks.

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

West Ham

I don't particularly hate Londoners. Nor even London football fans (though that requires a bit more zen). I just think it's better if London football is suitably removed from the upper echelons of the top division. That's the proper territory of northern clubs.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

West Ham

They came within a game of winning the league in 1986, the year they had McAvennie and Cottee up front. Going into the last weekend, if Liverpool had lost or drawn at Chelsea, the West Ham - Everton game on the Monday night would have decided the title. Chelsea, of course, couldn't stand the thought of that, so let Liverpool win, so we never got to see what would have happened in that "title decider".

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

West Ham

I should also mention that the only WH fan I've had to deal with in person was someone I met in my gap year nearly 33 years ago, from Lincolnshire with a broad Lincolnshire accent (but presumably some London ancestry to explain his bizarre allegiance). He was a totally moronic knob-end who sang a ditty which started "Spurs are on their way to Belsen...."

I'm sure most WH fans are lovely family-friendly salt of the earth types, but I can't help remembering that bloke. And of course there's the Allardyce thing.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

West Ham

Danny Dyer's a West Ham fan. So's Russell Brand. I think you can build your own dynamic from there.

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

West Ham

Actually, spot the deliberate error (Christmas drinks at the neighbour's, you won't be surprised to learn) - Chelsea are top of the notional London mini-league of course, Allardyce's outfit are second, but still out-performing expectations to be ahead of the Arse and the glory glory Tottenham Hotspurs. I must have forgotten Chelsea are a London club because they're owned by Russia.

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

West Ham

Rogin the Armchair Fan wrote: Danny Dyer's a West Ham fan. So's Russell Brand. I think you can build your own dynamic from there.

Even more worryingly, so is Iain Dale. I'm starting to think Evariste was really onto something.

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

West Ham

Actually, it's Man United who have that ghastly "glory glory ner-ner-ner-ner" thing isn't it. Apologies to Spurs if I got that wrong.

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

West Ham

I asked our old trusted friend YouGov Profiler about West Ham fans. Here's what he told me.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

West Ham

No, Spurs started the "Glory, glory Tottenham Hotspur" song in the 60s, Man U (as with almost all of "their" songs) just nicked it. I think the entire "Man United" shortening of their name itself came about purely to fit into that song, as it was the only one they had through the whole 1970s. And 1980s.

In 1993 they nicked the "Ooh ahh, Cantona" one off Leeds.

[Diable Rouge]

West Ham

You nicked YNWA from Celtic, and it was reportedly also sung at Old Trafford before Anfield.

[Evariste Euler Gauss]

West Ham

Cheers Rogin, I thought I had both club names in my head in relation to that god-awful song.

Pat, that YouGov profile thing is amusing. But before rushing to condemn WH fans on the basis of those results, could I ask whether you've obtained less politically right-leaning results from testing any other club's fans in the same way?

[SouthdownRebel]

West Ham

And this section tells us that a Hammers fan is more likely than the average citizen to be a roast pigeon eater who enjoys painting

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/West_..._F_C/lifestyle

[jeanmid]

West Ham

Here's the yougov profile for Leeds fans

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Leeds_United_A_F_C/demographics

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

West Ham

Here are Celtic, Rangers and Millwall for reference. So far so true to cliché:

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Celtic_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Rangers_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Millw...C/demographics

[sw2borshch]

West Ham

[EIM]

West Ham

West Ham are awful. The porn barons, Karen Brady, Sam Allardyce, Kevin Nolan, Kevin Nolan's chicken dance, Eastenders, bubbles, Cas Pennant, Left Wing Italian ultra's bizarre infatuation with them, Lonsdale trainers, the Queen Mum, the Krays, Bubble and Squeak on a fucking breakfast. Terrible gear, that lot.

Rogin, of course, stole his entire act from Fartle, who in turn borrowed heavily from me. As Mark Twain, and doubtless hundreds of others said, there are no new ideas.

[Kevin S]

West Ham

Alf Garnett

[Magik]

West Ham

[Eggchaser]

West Ham

I, for one, am enjoying Stewart Downing's reinvention as a trequartista.

[AMMS]

West Ham

Pat McGatt wrote: Here are Celtic, Rangers and Millwall for reference. So far so true to cliché:

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Celtic_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Rangers_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Millw...C/demographics

That explains why all those right of centre politicians keep getting elected in the west of Scotland.

[Louis Van Faartle]

West Ham

West Ham fans are a hateful bunch of morons with their knee length leather jackets and tough guy haircuts.

At least Chelsea fans are aware of the fact nobody likes them...

[tracteurgarcon]

West Ham

Those YouGov profiles are a bit odd, aren't they?

Apparently West Ham supporters top 5 celebrities are;

1. Russell Brand (fair enough, he's probably the most famous celebrity 'Ammers fan)
2. Georgie Thompson (erm... okay, she's a Sky sports presenter?)
3. Ray Winstone (see Russell Brand)
4. Tomasz Schafernaker (!!!! I had to look him up, he's a BBC meteorologist)
5. Billy Crystal (Eh? Bit random)

Also, West Ham fan's No. 3 film is apparently manga classic "Akira".

[Vulgarian Visigoth]

West Ham

AMMS wrote:

Here are Celtic, Rangers and Millwall for reference. So far so true to cliché:

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Celtic_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Rangers_F_C/demographics

https://yougov.co.uk/profiler#/Millw...C/demographics

That explains why all those right of centre politicians keep getting elected in the west of Scotland.

YouTube Profiler is written by God and it must not be questioned.