Return of the Jedi questions

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

1. "In the Sarlacc, you will be slowly digested for a thousand years"- are these Tattooine years? Do they last like 3 days or something? How does anyone know, otherwise?

2. How does Darth Vader (and the Emperor come to that) know all about Luke being a Skywalker, but not Leia? He's had Leia under interrogation in a bloody cell for days in the first film.

3. How does Lando Calrissian go from being a complete civilian to a General in the Rebel Alliance in about three weeks? That's the sort of direct entrant recruitment policy that fucks the Civil Service, never mind a military operation.

[tone_burst]

Return of the Jedi questions

1) Utter shite, but the answer - rather depressingly, not to mention conveniently - is that the Sarlacc's comprehension of time past, present and future is more or less exactly the same as a MK Dons season ticket holder's. Only there's only 5 days in a week for some reason....

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Galactic_Standard_Calendar

2/3) No idea.

[Beatle Simon]

Return of the Jedi questions

1. Apparently, when ROTJ was released, there was outrage that such a cult character like Boba Fett would have a trivial death in the Sarlaac, that afterwards in some of the fan-fiction, Boba Fett had escaped through the Sarlaac's bum.

2. The Jedi were trained not to show emotions, and as Luke was still a Jedi-in-training, his feelings betrayed him. Isuppose with all the Jedi out of the way for 20+ years, there was no need to look for another Skywalker.

3. In ROTJ, its alluded to that Han and Lando fought together (possibly for the Empire) a few years earlier at some big battle, hence the swift promotion.

[Guy Profumo]

Return of the Jedi questions

2. Do they not take DNA samples from their prisoners as a matter of routine?

Sounds extra-ordinarily sloppy for an organisation as, er, well, "organised", as the Empire.

[Boris Carpark]

Return of the Jedi questions

Yeah, &, right.
How come at any point in episodes 4-7 doesn't Darth Vader look at C3-PO & go, "Oh look, there's that robot I invented when I was a kid."
Or C3-PO go, "Oh look, there's the bloke that invented me."
Or something.

[Beatle Simon]

Return of the Jedi questions

Listen, first of all episode 7 hasn't been made, right, and even then, Darth Vader won't be in it because he died in episode 6.
C3PO and R2D2 had their memories wiped at the end of episode 3 to help hide the identities of the Skywalker twins (also see my answer above).
And finally, I think Darth Vader has a lot more on his mind than checking up on his boyhood past-times, particularly when those sort of androids are quite common in Star Wars.

Does anyone else want have a (Star Wars related) go? Eh?

[Stumpy Pepys]

Return of the Jedi questions

Rogin the Armchair Fan wrote: 2. How does Darth Vader (and the Emperor come to that) know all about Luke being a Skywalker, but not Leia? He's had Leia under interrogation in a bloody cell for days in the first film.

Yeah that's always annoyed me as well.

INT. LOCATION - TATOOINE POST OFFICE

LUKE

Good morning. I'm here to pick up a parcel. The name's Skywalker.

POST OFFICE CLERK

Oh yes, as in Anakin Skywalker? You know, Darth Vader, evil number two of the Galactic Empire … any relation?

LUKE

Well, I hardly think so. I mean I'm just an unremarkable orphan.

[Reed John]

Return of the Jedi questions

The Emperor was probably the only one who knew Darth Vader's true identity.

Perhaps Skywalker was a common name, but either way, the rest of the Imperial leadership was unaware of Luke's significance and or existence. Recall that in Star Wars, Peter Cushing says to Vader, "You, my friend, are all that's left of their religion."

Leia was hidden because she never connected to the Force like Luke did.

Yoda stayed hidden on Degobah because that tree-cave was where an ancient evil had died and left a lot of negative vibes. Yoda's "Force signal" or whatever was obscured by the bad voodoo being broadcast by that tree. Really, I read that in one of the Star Wars reference books.

[EIM]

Return of the Jedi questions

I used to really like Star Wars, you know. Could tell you the pilot names and call signs of Red Squadron at the Battle of Yavin. But a point must come where you stop, take stock, and say "At some point I would like to kiss a girl. Or boy. Or someone who doesn't fit on the gender spectrum. For this is OTF on the eve of 2014 and we respect that. "

That point, Serge, will surely come for you soon.

[Stumpy Pepys]

Return of the Jedi questions

I caught the second half of Revenge of the Sith over Christmas, which I'd never got around to watching.

There was way too much CGI and it was all rotten. It was like watching my nephew play X-Box. Whereas the effects in the nearly forty-year-old original Star Wars still look perfectly fine.

[EIM]

Return of the Jedi questions

Did you see Superman II? Deary me the effects were bad, especially the young lad falling over Niagara Falls.

I've not watched the new trilogy. The thought scares me. Why ruin it? Though I tried rewatching the original films recently and they were shit too. It's sad, that. I'll be dead soon.

[Boris Carpark]

Return of the Jedi questions

Serge wrote: Listen, first of all episode 7 hasn't been made, right, and even then, Darth Vader won't be in it because he died in episode 6.
C3PO and R2D2 had their memories wiped at the end of episode 3 to help hide the identities of the Skywalker twins (also see my answer above).
And finally, I think Darth Vader has a lot more on his mind than checking up on his boyhood past-times, particularly when those sort of androids are quite common in Star Wars.

Does anyone else want have a (Star Wars related) go? Eh?

Thanks for clarifying, Serge. Though I reckon if I invented a robot that spoke all different languages & that when I was about 5 I'd remember it & at some point start thinking 'those robots I invented when I was about 5 seem awfully prevalent these days, its about time I got paid for that.'
Or is that what made him go all bad & that? Cos it would get right on my tits, I can tell you.

Nice to see EIM back an all.

[EIM]

Return of the Jedi questions

Peace and love, Carpark.