Masterchef's back...

[Sean of the Shed]

...tomorrow night on BBC 2. And this is the one without the celebrities being right old drama queens (though having said that, the last sleb one wasn't that bad to be honest).
I'm not sure why I like this programme so much, the presenters aren't particularly appealing, and the contestants tend to be somewhat fuck-witted. It just seems to push the right buttons, and the finished recipes look so exciting (mostly). My favourite thing to do is to sit watching it eating my oven ready lasagne and oven ready potato wedges. It's inspired if not inspiring.

[Tony C]

Masterchef's back...

I absolutely love it.

As usual I doubt I'll miss more than one or two episodes in the entire series.

[Guest]

Masterchef's back...

It's weird isn't it. They're all on there gleefully boiling up bits of corpses & consuming the results and yet I really like watching it. The characters last time were brilliant.

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

Nice to see the "professionals" making great big doorstep slices of toast for their chicken livers. Proper fine dining.

[Mumpo]

Masterchef's back...

Black kitchen. Half an hour. Grossman. The only way to do Masterchef.

[Guest]

Masterchef's back...

The 9ft pepper grinders. yeah.

[Guest]

Masterchef's back...

I'm watching on Iplayer. Even now they managed to find people willing to go 'I know I can win this!' before even beginning.
Even I know what a cardoon is. Even I would be able to work out which bits were the good bits.

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

On today's programme we got to see what looked like a bloke trying to shave a fish with a flick-knife.

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

French Cockney geezer Ben seems to be the man to beat so far.
"For dessert I weel be makeeeng ze pear sponge, guvnor, wiz raspberriieees and ze marzipan, you slaaaaag."
He certainly impressed the food critics, Peter Griffin, Superintendent Chalmers and Captain Jack Sparrow.

[Guest]

Masterchef's back...

Ben is a total star. He's brilliant.

[Gerontophile]

Masterchef's back...

I wont watch this or anything else with that little bald twat. He is a fucking greengrocer. Lets see him up against John Torode (who is an excellent chef)... wanker.

(Nothing against bald people, couldnt think of another adjective which was objective enough... big-glasses? mockney? arsehole-ish?, nope they dont work.)

[Ray de Galles]

Masterchef's back...

Mumpo wrote:

Black kitchen. Half an hour. Grossman. The only way to do Masterchef.

Mumpo is licensed to speak for me on the issue.

[G-Man]

Masterchef's back...

The bald twat is compelling to watch though. That shouting shtick that inevitably ends with the hackneyed phrase: "But is he/she good enough?"

Torode looks like someone who can be highly obnoxious in ways only chefs can be (and usually are, the fuckers).

[Guest]

Masterchef's back...

It's awful. He stands for loads of things that I can't be doing with. So does Heston Blumenthal. But they're both kind of attractive. I hate that.

[Lucy Waterman]

Masterchef's back...

The best bits are when the judges confer, when the style of filming makes it look like they are shouting directly into each other's faces. Also, you can tell that they film cutaways of Gregg Wallace afterwards and insert them later to break up John Torode's long spiels. You can tell this because all - ALL - of these cutaways look incredibly stagey and fake. Nod, Gregg, nod! Nod again!

[Etienne]

Masterchef's back...

Anyone watch Australian Masterchef? It's a weird mix of UK masterchef cooking, and bizarre big Brother style reality show.

[Hofzinser]

Masterchef's back...

I love Australian Masterchef. I like the UK version but I reckon the Australian take on it is ten times better.

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

Never seen it. In my mind I imagine it to be participated by stereotypical Aussies.
"G'day John, for tucker today I'm going to be barbecuing some shrimps, with a side of lager, and for dessert I'm going to be having a fight."

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

Did anyone else find themselves willing Kevin to fall flat on his face in last night's episode? The smug twat.

[Mumpo]

Masterchef's back...

I was very disappointed by the female judge. Whilst berating the contestants for their lack of basic culinary skills, she was herself entirely inept at fulfilling the role of villainous antagonist, continually rolling her eyes and adopting a decidedly comical 'Humph!' expression.

You're going to need to bo better than that, love.

[Central Rain]

Masterchef's back...

Sean of the Shed wrote:

Did anyone else find themselves willing Kevin to fall flat on his face in last night's episode? The smug twat.

Yes, though he seemed to be unable to keep up the act once he found himself in the presence of Michel Roux Jr.

[Central Rain]

Masterchef's back...

Oh dear. It actually did go horribly wrong for Kevin and he was unable to serve his dessert in the quarter-final. Poor sod was in tears.

[Mumpo]

Masterchef's back...

Ssh. I'm trying to watch The Apprentice.

[Sean of the Shed]

Masterchef's back...

I knew I shouldn't have clicked on this thread, I still have to watch this yet, but I couldn't stop myself, like peeling the corner from a present you've not been able to decipher by squeezing or shaking.

[Gerontophile]

Masterchef's back...

Its a record token.