Right now, s'the fact that the version of 'Get Happy' that accompanies the current homebase adverts changes 'Get ready for judgement day' to 'get ready for a brand new day'.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
On some shit Fosters ad, they have "Blister in the Sun" by the Violent Femmes with a load of the words changed.
When I'm walking I strut my stuff
and I'm so hung (strung)
I fly like a kite (High as)
I just might
Stop to check you out
Cunts. Shit beer producing cunts.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
Lots of customised metal vehicles belting it down a runway to Queen's 'Don't Stop Me Now'. I think I'll go out and buy some chocolate.
Except I won't. It's like the Benetton ads of old - where the execution of an idea is meant to be so mountainously clever you think it's a great ad. But it ain't.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
Why bother thinking up a new idea when you can just copy that idea someone else had of using loads of different coloured objects moving about? Or the one where you walk or drive around affecting people and/or your surroundings in various ways? Loada toss.
Actually I thankfully don't see very many ads these days. Ad block (on the web) and a PVR (for TV) has seen to that. It's just cinemas where I'm trapped into seeing them now.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
That bleepy beepy music in the Lloyds-TSB ads annoys me immenseley, as does the use started by TSB but taken up by others of dreadful, cheap 3D characters that all look identical across adverts for all kinds of companies.
And the adverts with the cars floating in the air, because after all this time I still end up not remembering what it's an advert for.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
I detest the use of both whimsical sounding music and songs by crooners.
Ah, one exception: I suddenly remember that Guinness ad where a camera floatingly zooms into the chamber of this huge, fancifully-designed tower where a glass of the Good Stuff is stored. It zooms into the swirling foam (I think) and - voom! - we start the journey again.
It's arguable that the song accompanying it - John Barry's Louis Armstrong - sung 'We Have All The Time In The World' - made it three times as acceptable, but it's a jewel compared to the opportunistic crap that followed it.
A bit rough on quality, but here it is:
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
Dirt Devil vacuum cleaners did a whole campaign with dead stars - including Fred Astaire dancing with one - that still pisses me off to this day. Someone does a watch campaign where dead stars are wearing their brand. Just. Fucking. Wrong. Even if their 'estate' officially licensed it.
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
Which one was that then?*
Edith Piaf being subtitled to suggest that she's recommending Specsavers fucks me off no end.
I'm not all that keen on Piaf myself, but I feel the same. There's something especially cheap, mean and hollow about it that gets me.
*No, it's all right, I've just remembered. It's the skydiving one isn't it?
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
The new volkswagon one where they have cleverly jumbled up some real world sounds, to be used on a loop as mental torture for captured soldiers.
Who said ads have no secondary uses?
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Little things that annoy you about ads today
I hate any advert that anyone considers "a good advert", but especially the prog ones. Big budget, award-winning shit - meaningless pseudery and cocaine-crazed pomposity. That disgusting Guinness advert with the horses in the sea - makes me want to fucking throttle someone. The last five years of smug Honda bollocks.
The only ones that don't irritate me at all are the cheap shit adverts for nothing products. Except that one for some sort of low calorie food range where that woman sings "tutti frutti, now my jeans fit my booty", which is (in a very basic, primal way) the most irritating thirty seconds of television ever. Luckily, I don't watch television very often these days.
One relatively little thing that does bother me is the way ad people pick up on the most irritating new phrases, the kind of thing where if you hear someone saying it, you know you don't have to bother talking to them ever again because they just ARE a cock, and immediately cram them into adverts - because that's how the absolute fucking wankers these people know talk, so they assume everyone will love it. It's "edgy", "kinda funky". Lurpak butter has pissed me off greatly with this of late. Every time I take the lid off a new tub of spreadable butter when I'm trying to make my breakfast toast, I'm greeted with a bit of shiny paper saying "Wonky Is Good - Never Trust A Straight Loaf" or "MASH - Food Of The Gods". If any human being tried the "... is good" thing, or referred to something as "food of the gods" in my fucking kitchen, especially when I've just woken up, they would be swiftly ejected from the premises with a snapped-off microwave door embedded in their forehead, so I certainly don't expect it from my fucking butter. Empty-headed, happy-go-lucky yellow shit.
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