Things that go bump in the night

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Is Paranormal Activity really worth the hype?

I'm thinking of going to see it this weekend, but I've kind of read that it's a bit "Blair Witch meets the Exorcist - Lite", and the only reason it dragged in so much excitement in the States was that stuff about Steven Spielberg saying he was so scared he thought his own bedroom doors locked by themselves, which is kind of the thing a producer would say, isn't it.

If it's just 90 minutes of scared people talking to camera on night camera while things go bump behind them, then a big crash scene at the end, I reckon I've already seen it, every time I watch Derek Acorah and Yvette Fielding on Living TV.

Is it worth it?

[Guest]

Things that go bump in the night

It sounds OK... people tell me it's formulaic with a few scares. I'll probably go to see it tomorrow. Unless I decide I feel like seeing the new Coens instead.

[Mumpo]

Things that go bump in the night

Is it about 'scares' though, this kind of thing? Isn't it supposed to be more... unsettling?

[Guest]

Things that go bump in the night

It's got both really. I am a bit unsettled now I've seen it. But I am a big old scaredycat. The first reel is a bit dull, a bit so-what, but after that it draws you in pretty effectively. Not great by any means, but it kind of delivers what it promises.

[Lucia Lanigan]

Things that go bump in the night

This is the lamest film I have ever seen. The hype really is embarassing, particularly when the likes of the Guardian's main film critic are talking about voiding their bowels in the cinema.

I watched it on a massive cinema screen at deafening volume, and still it didn't make me jump or flinch once. In any half-decent film, a slammed door or someone's face suddenly appearing full screen will do that; the fascism of the cinema experience makes it difficult not to have that kind of impact.

I didn't find it at all unsettling either, because the plot - crucially, and suicidally for the film - is spelled out about ten minutes in (blowing all that "nothing scarier than what you don't know/can't see" stuff out of the water). And its premise is just too silly to carry off without a mega-budget phantasmagoria and some much stronger ideas. From there on in, I was counting down the minutes until I could leave.

There's none of the fun stuff that carries you through a mediocre horror film, even, so I spent the whole time idly pondering at the guy's weird ears and toes, and the woman's inescapable boobs, to be honest. There's not much else to look at in a super-sized home video of people in their jim jams.

In short: it's a good film school project that should never have reached Norwich.

*******************SPOILER*****************

The part where I started punching my own face in dismay? When the three-pronged "demon footprints" appear in the talcum powder on their floor. I wanted Daffy Duck to appear and blow a raspberry.

[Rogin the Armchair fan]

Things that go bump in the night

There's "inescapable boobs"? Hmm ...

[Guest]

Things that go bump in the night

Yes no one wears much because they're always indoors in the evenings/mornings.

I really didn't think it was that shite LL. I was less bored/annoyed than I was by Cloverfield, for example (maybe just because Micah tends to put the camera down more often).

[Lucia Lanigan]

Things that go bump in the night

Ah, see, I've not watched that or Blair Witch , so perhaps I just don't know how lucky I am.

[Guest]

Things that go bump in the night

I think the BWP is sort of worth a watch just out of interest, but if you hated PA there's probably absolutely no point...

[hobbes]

Things that go bump in the night

Blair Witch was excellent, I thought. Because although all the way through, I was thinking "yeah yeah, whatever." I was still thinking about the last scene days later.

[Spearmint Rhino]

Things that go bump in the night

FUCK. Just spend ages writing a post, then my browser mysteriously went back a page and I lost it all. Woooh, supernatural stuff eh? I'll try again on a Word doc, then copy-paste...

Really good film, I thought. 8/10, verging on a 9. I speak as someone who almost bricked myself at Blair Witch (it helped that I watched it home, alone, in total darkness), and as someone who's always believed that a trickle of blood is more effective than 1,000 gallons, and that the creepy beats the gory every time.

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

Scariest Moments:
3. The discovery of the photo. The use of old colour photos in a horror context always gets me, for various reasons.
2. Katie's smile. You know the one.
1. The disapproving glances that Katie's female friends shoot Micah's way.

(I jest only slightly. So much truth in that coldness, that “You're a man, you wouldn't understand” attitude. I laughed out loud for the only time.)

Least Scary Moments:
3. Anything involving the psychic. Fuck off. You're almost as annoying as the squeaky dwarf from Poltergeist
2. The ouija board catching fire. Too close to typical trad-horror pyrotechnics (literally).
1. Katie's fang-mouthed raaar at the end.

(They should have finished it when Katie screams downstairs, and Micah leaves the room to investigate.)

END SPOILERS END SPOILERS END SPOILERS

Mark Kermode reckons that this is a film which becomes more effective the second time you see it, because you start noticing various seemingly innocent objects and fixtures and fittings in the background of the shot, and you know what's going to happen to them later on. I can believe that, although I doubt I'll bother to verify it.

Paranormal Activity isn't groundbreaking as such, because 'found footage' movies are an established genre now (post-Blair Witch, post-Cloverfield, and with The Fourth Kind doing the rounds, which sounds like a big steaming dog-turd), but it's a damn good stab at the genre.

I suspect it will stay with me for a while, and it's succeeded in doing what few horror movies achieve: it's made me afraid of the dark.

(By the way, LL is right about the “inescapable boobs”. They aren't super-huge or gratuitously on show or anything, but there's something about them which unfailingly draws the eye.)

[Wyatt Earp]

Things that go bump in the night

I've wept at the movies, and I've felt uplifted, and I've felt thrilled, and intrigued, and triumphant, and loads of things. But I've never felt genuinely frightened by a film. I lack the gene, or something.

[Jimski]

Things that go bump in the night

I wanted to like this more than I did. I thought Blair Witch was the scariest US horror for years, and was hoping for more of the same. But it never really delivered. There were times when I was almost getting sucked in, but then there'd always be a moment which pulled me right out again. The thing about Blair Witch is it didn't let up. This film kept bringing one back into it with daytime stuff, which was mainly annoying rather than scary.

And the ending was nonsense. Though I've read that Spielberg suggested it be changed to that from an original, different ending.

Still it was ok. And I like the idea that a film made for (relative) peanuts can still do well. Gives hope to everyone.

[Mumpo]

Things that go bump in the night

Just watched it. Downstairs, on the telly. Or, to be more precise, on the laptop, via Windows Media Player, hooked up to the telly. Set to full screen, so the progress bar wasn't showing. Except once. You know how the progress bar only reappears when the mouse is moved? Can you guess which scene the progress bar appeared during, then? Can you?

[Gangster Octopus]

Things that go bump in the night

Bloody hell! Jimski came back! Where's he gone now?